Just Be Grateful

Gratitude is everywhere these days—featured in popular articles, podcasts, and even corporate initiatives. But are we truly getting it right?

Last Thanksgiving, in November 2022, I came across a perspective on gratitude from Srikumar Rao that fundamentally shifted my mindset. His wisdom has made all the difference for me, and with Thanksgiving upon us again, I’d like to share what I’ve learned, so we can reflect together on the essence of gratitude.

Srikumar Rao on the Layers of Gratitude

Rao, a renowned teacher of the course Creativity and Personal Mastery, advocates a unique approach to gratitude—one that transcends lists and comparisons. In his words:

"You cannot think gratitude. You have to feel it."

This distinction is profound. Many of us diligently note three things we’re grateful for each day. We check the box: food to eat? Check. A roof over our heads? Check. Family? Check. Yet this mechanical exercise often leaves us cold, failing to deliver the profound joy and peace we expect.

Rao explains why this happens. Gratitude, when reduced to comparison (“I’m grateful because I’m better off than others”), carries an undercurrent of exploitation. By positioning ourselves as “better off,” we risk overlooking the richness in others' lives—or the transient nature of our own circumstances.

Instead, Rao suggests moving beyond being “grateful for” anything specific. Why? Because anything we’re grateful for—a job, good health, financial stability—can vanish in an instant.

Just Be Grateful

Rao’s invitation is simple yet transformative:

“Learn to be grateful. Just grateful. Not grateful for anything.”

He advises us to practice gratitude as a state of being, untethered from possessions or circumstances. This shift frees us from fear, anxiety, and the weight of “what if.”

One practical way to cultivate this mindset, according to Rao, is through immersion in beauty. Recall a moment of breathtaking natural splendor or quiet stillness. Relive it in granular detail. With practice, gratitude will emerge organically—unforced and enduring.

From Thinking to Feeling

Gratitude becomes transformative when it moves from the intellectual to the emotional. Take an item from your gratitude list and reflect deeply: How is it woven into the fabric of your life? What stories does it carry? How does it connect to other elements in your world?

As Rao points out, this requires conscious effort and patience, but the rewards are unparalleled.

“When you are feeling gratitude, you are not angry. You are not fearful. You are not anxious. These feelings cannot coexist with gratitude.”

This Thanksgiving, I encourage all of us to embrace gratitude not as an exercise, but as a state of being. Let’s step beyond the “grateful for” mindset and simply be grateful.

Happy Thanksgiving to all! May your holiday be filled with awe, connection, and the quiet joy of simply being grateful.

You can read Srikumar Rao’s original posts here.