Just Because You’re Great at Something Doesn’t Mean That’s Why You’re Here On Earth

I’m fairly certain I figured out the science behind pure joy and the graceful creation of success.

It’s taken me quite a few years and an exceptional journey to learn that just because I rock at I.T. infrastructure and operations, that’s exactly what I should be avoiding! I have this gravitational pull toward everything I'm great at, and it took me until this year to figure out I’m destined to just point out suggestions to the Chief Operating Officer (COO), based on my knowledge, instincts and experience, but to then run away as fast as I can...and keep my focus on the reason I'm here on earth...to write, market and mentor!

I’ve had a new boss since February this year. It just so happens he is a visionary who naturally practices what I’m trying so hard to master…he stays in his lane and it fully enables his magic to flow. In his case, when he allows himself to get into the weeds of I.T. infrastructure or people operations, it creates noise that disrupts his natural, magical flow. He stays (relentlessly) hyper-focused on exercising his expertise in geriatric psychotherapy and in-home concierge care for adults in need. Okay, and nurturing his venture capital fund:)

We’ll because of this very discipline he practices, when he sees certain magic in others, he shuts down the noise and points that person toward his or her magical path. When I use the word magic, I refer to the brilliant talents a person might have that also aligns with why they’re here on earth.

“Why they’re here on earth” seems to align with what comes easy, causes that person to work so hard they lose track of time, and they create extraordinary results…but it seems effortless.

Funny that it sounds so simple, but why do so many leaders, organizations AND individuals struggle with these temptations that cause interference with our happiness and our natural collective flow? In my case, I would argue or justify my dysfunctional gravitation toward IT and operations by claiming, "In order for me to soar as a multi-channel strategist, branding expert and inspiring marketing communicator, I need solid IT infrastructure and operations bolted below it all." Just to clarify, if there were no COO or I.T. guy for me to turn to, I'd do it, and do it with glee, but these types of functions do not define "my happy place".

As of this year, I’ve noticed I’ve been able to enjoy creating, impacting and delivering without caring much about the noise. I’m just doing what I need to do and caring about ‘my lane’ and the people I touch every day. Now I want to put a science behind it because I’ve seen a special infusion of magic happen with our business this year.

What’s the formula?

First you have to recognize the difference between what you’re great at and dislike doing, then consider turning away...and turn toward the things you love. For instance, I just love being interviewed in the media, speaking at conferences, and passing on success tips. It's exciting, it enhances lives, and doesn't even seem like work to me.

One day a few years ago, we were visiting colleges with our daughter and talking about majors and her future. She had been involved with Boys and Girls Club as a member since she was 6 years’ old, and was then hired on as staff through high school. While she excelled at everything in school; math, science, art, music…she absolutely loved community service and organizing community improvement projects. I pointed out to her that she might want to look into degrees that can point her toward managing people, community efforts and maybe heading up a non-profit. She replied (very quickly) with, “MOM! I HATE MANAGING PEOPLE!” That was a life-changing moment for me! At that point, I had been a Managing Director and CEO for a decade and thought, ”How funny, I don’t really like managing operations or people either. What am I doing?”

Second, when you turn away, know what is it you should be turning toward?

What are you great at doing AND love, AND see it makes a difference?

The funniest thing happened several years ago. We always knew our daughter absolutely loved computers and art. Even as a tiny kid, we had both our kids set up with computers and automated games that would prompt them through learning how to build amusement parks (Roller Coaster Tycoon) or how to design spaces (SketchUp). They both just loved it, and would create things together for hours on end. Each kid took on a different role in the projects. During their free time, they’d also finger-paint at an easel (naked-easy clean up), draw, read books and work on puzzles. They ignored other games and toys we had.

We knew our daughter loved reading, designing things and painting since she was 2. We didn’t realize she was a spectacular photo-realistic freehand artist until she was a senior in high school. She combined this with her love for creating artwork with computers AND AVOIDING HAVING TO MANAGE PEOPLE, with a pursuit of Graphic Design.

WOW! She turned into an AMAZING graphic designer, and THEN realized through the years that even though she’s a great designer, her happy place involves building/coding and making graphics move (motion graphics) over designing. Again, while she's great at designing, the designing part has not been her happy place. It's so easy to misunderstand this and think you hate designing and leave the field all-together, right?

We often take these micro decisions that guide our happiness for granted, but we are all wise to think about ourselves as children. Ask your parents or guardians or mentors who know you deeply, what they see in you. Let that information sit for a while and make mental decisions about what you’re great at AND that brings you joy. It’s perfectly fine to go more niche! Actually, I’m highly recommending it!

Third, look at some of the other things you gravitate toward to help determine what type of people you want around you, what you want to learn for the rest of your life…or for the short term 3-5 years, because life is a journey you are wise to write and live it chapter-by-chapter.

Now we’ll study our son. He always gravitated toward studying things versus running around flailing. Granted, he’s very athletic and loves team sports and long-distance running, but it’s not “THE thing that makes time fly by without even noticing”. He was once sitting in the grass trying to make sense of how it worked, pulling out single blades and looking at the roots. A friend of ours pointed out how lucky we were he was so easy to manage. It didn’t occur to us as stand-out until our friend made that comment...and years later!

We also noticed he LOVED biographies and learning about history. Now that I think of it, he also LOVED when his dad and I (we ran a huge company together) would talk business at the table. He’d pipe in with little kid ideas and ask questions. Lots of times those very uncomplicated/pure thoughts would make my hubby and I look at each other and laugh. Our son, even when he was as young as 8 years’ old would say things that would get us on track and that we totally agreed with; ideas that solved our quandaries.

Okay, you may have guessed it, he pursued a degree in Finance and Business Data Analytics. During this journey of his, he worked several internships and noticed that while he was very good at sales, marketing, math and accounting, that is not what brought him joy and made him get engrossed to the point in which he’d lose track of time. He finally hit it…not banking, not financial planning, not sales (even though that’s where the big bucks and opportunities are...and he loves market research), he wanted to be an equity analyst, investment analyst, or business valuation specialist. He LOVES learning about the economy, historical trends, elements of business that create value, learning about leaders and leadership strategies, and building financial models. He also loves managing his own stock portfolio and the type of studying of data that goes along with choosing stocks, and determining buy and sell opportunities.

He’s also made himself a good amount of money investing and managing his money in the stock market. Most people would have guided him toward being a financial planner, but he noticed that path is a sales position, and it’s “the guts of it all” that brings him extreme excitement. Who would have guessed?

Because HE loves all this, he assumes EVERYONE has to love it. He also feels "there's no way I can make money doing this, I love it too much...it's not work." Isn't that strange? It seems so common to feel that way about our destined path. Why?<--REALLY! Let me know! I’d often point out to him that most people would find what he loves to be grueling. His sister mentioned to him that if she were hired as an equity analyst she’d literally cry.

My new boss, Jon Siegel, and his #2 Kasondra McCormick, happen to run an In-home concierge caregiving company and they assigned me to a couple of VIP clients so I could develop my knowledge as to what the caregivers experience from corporate, and to get a feel for what our clients experience. They knew it would make me connect with "how they're different"..."how they do it"...and fuel me to exercise my true magic to help them scale and triple+ the business seemingly effortlessly. Gosh darn it, they kept me in my marketing lane and we have done it...and perfect clients and exceptional caregivers keep flowing in.

I learned I'm great at caregiving and I actually even love the exercise and fulfillment associated with the role. Days would just fly by and I was getting my eyesight back from not being in front of a computer all day. I could also see how certain personality types would hate being caregivers, but others who are either behind computers, feeling unfulfilled, or unemployed...and who love serving and creating happiness, would absolutely love it, make more money, feel so much happier, and they wouldn't be able to understand why they didn't train to become a senior caregiver sooner!

You’d think I’d just love being a caregiver, but Jon and Kasondra knew it would spark so much more value in me. (Thanks Jon!)

In my case, I love this new narrower path I’m on in regard to multi-channel marketing strategy, branding, non-traditional lead generation, and curriculum development and training.

I learned that I love to caregive adults in need because:

1.      It’s physically active,

2.      It causes smiles despite the inevitable challenges,

3.      and it absolutely improves lives for everyone involved when it’s done right.

In my case, my love of caregiving actually fed my “destined path’ by It sparking some service-excellence ideas and new approaches to building culture, care, and training we’re implementing. Other people just simply LOVE CAREGIVING AND THAT’S THAT!

(BTW, if any of you in Arizona or Beverly Hills want to try caregiving P/T for extra money and fulfillment, Jon’s company trains and treats you right. [email protected])

I sure hope these stories hit home with you in some way. I believe if we spend deliberate time paying attention to what brings us joy that we’re also extraordinary at creating results from it…and time flies when we’re digging in and doing it…well…it’s time to narrow your role down to your destined niche. Sounds funny, but we're supposed to be happy!

I highly recommend you try the following in writing or “selfeo” (selfie-video):

1.      Look at your professional life right now. What would you want to cut out, what would you like to keep doing that would bring you more joy?

2.      With that said, what role could you take on you’d think is fun if you modified your role? …Or write yourself a position description,

3.      What type of technology are you great at and truly enjoy?

4.      How can you leverage your existing knowledge or connections to get up to speed quickly and differentiate yourself as invaluable if you made a pivot toward a better/tighter path?

5.      Put effort into searching job boards/recruiting websites with those key words and see what comes up!

The results can guide you to a tighter role in your existing organization, a new path, or a new hobby or side-gig.

You can get what you ask for, but it better be clear and it better be good! ??

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