THE JOURNEY OF A MOTHER’S LOVE

A Black History Month Tribute with Tassany C. Henderson, Ed.D

The tapestry of our nation’s history is woven with threads of resilience, courage, and unyielding strength. As we immerse ourselves in the richness of Black History Month, we are wise to celebrate the luminaries who helped weave our history’s tapestry with their remarkable contributions of grit, determination, and forward progress. These luminaries are often sitting right next to us, within our circles of family, friends, and colleagues.

Today, I am honored to amplify the voice of a wonderful friend and respected colleague, Tassany Henderson , who embodies the essence of this significant month. Her journey is a testament to the transformative power of resilience and the enduring legacy of those who paved the way before her. As Tassany will tell you, she draws inspiration from her mother—who serves as her cornerstone—modeling resilience, hard work, and the steadfast refusal to give up. Join me as we embark on a journey guided by Tassany's wisdom, passion, and unwavering dedication to honoring the past while shaping a future brimming with possibility. Here’s Tassany:

“When you gaze upon me, what you perceive is an African American woman. For some, my worth is diminished solely by the hue of my skin. To others, these identities seem like formidable obstacles that almost push me out of life’s arena. As women of color, too often we find ourselves having to exert twice the effort of those who don’t bear the same traits.

Thankfully, I have not let those obstacles limit who I am. While I could attribute my accomplishments solely to my education, it would only scratch the surface of my narrative. Truth be told, I am here today because of my mother. My mother is the cornerstone, the very foundation that has enabled me to stand strong. From my mother, I learned three very important things: the power of resilience, the value of hard work, and the importance of never giving up.

The Power of Resilience

Growing up, my mom faced considerable challenges and adversity. My mom was the oldest daughter of eight children, but still somewhere in the middle. Growing up, she never witnessed unconditional love. Despite not having that example, she raised her children in an environment full of love. She is living proof that even if you don’t know the way, you can still forge a new path to success. There is always light. It is important to remember that when we are overcome by darkness, we should always reflect and focus on that light within—God’s light.

By the time my mom graduated high school, she had given birth to my brother and became a single parent. Unlike myself, she didn’t have an example of what good parenting resembled. Google didn’t exist, and she did not have access to parenting classes. In the 1970s, as a teenage mother, she was already dismissed and considered ‘just another black girl on welfare.’ Despite becoming a young mother, she had dreams and aspirations of enrolling in computer science classes. Accomplishing her goals seemed impossible, as she had very few tools or resources available to her.

I was born 11 years after my brother. My mother was a single parent twice if that makes sense. Even though she was parenting a toddler and a teenager, she always found a way to juggle things. My mom’s mother was nonexistent and did not have a relationship with us, even though we lived in the same city. Thankfully, my mom had wonderful friends who acted more like aunts than friends. They were always around. My paternal grandparents provided childcare for me before I went to kindergarten.

As a child, I never felt like I went without anything, in part because my mom was a planner and sacrificed many things to ensure that my brother and I had what we needed. I played in the band for eight years, and each year we’d take a trip to another state. It was always a wonderful experience. Looking back, I noticed a pattern. She would always take more shifts at work because she knew that the trip was coming, and she wanted to be sure I could attend. She sacrificed her body, time, and health to make sure I had as many life-changing moments as possible. She is one of the most selfless people I know. She never gave up on her children.

Through my mom’s sacrifices and support, my mother nurtured within me a spirit of resilience that continues to drive me forward. Her unwavering belief in my potential has been a constant source of inspiration, propelling me to push beyond my limits and strive for excellence in everything I do.

The Value of Hard Work

My mother embodies the essence of hard work. Every day, she labored tirelessly in a factory, manufacturing auto parts for twelve grueling hours, six days a week. Despite her aspirations to further her education, her dreams of enrolling at Trevecca or completing a certificate at Nashville Tech (now, Nashville State Community College) remained out of reach. Faced with the responsibility to provide for her family, she persevered, driven by her commitment to us.

Her singular focus was clear: to ensure the well-being of her family. Despite moments of doubt and fatigue, she never succumbed to the temptation to quit. Instead, she pressed on, fueled by a determination to secure a better future for those she loved. She endured physical discomfort, and sometimes pain, from working in a manufacturing environment. The facility itself was neither heated or cooled, so the inside reflected the weather outside. It did not matter to my mom. Her job was a means to an end: success for her children.

Over time, her dedication and diligence were duly recognized, propelling her into a leadership role within the factory. Through her example, she imparted invaluable lessons of resilience and perseverance to my brother and me, showcasing firsthand the true meaning of hard work.

Today, I work hard because my mother worked hard for our family. I work hard because I want to show my mom her hard work and sacrifices were not in vain. I am currently the Associate Director of Career Development at Vanderbilt University at Peabody College, a role that allows me to help others. I am a helper because someone first helped me. My mother was my first friend, teacher, and partner.

The Importance of Never Giving Up

Typically, the greatest challenge lies in the unknown—what we don't know can often be our biggest obstacle. We never had anyone from our family attend college. We had no idea what college entailed. When my brother and I wanted to go to college, it was an unknown world for us.

Yet, my mother refused to give up on our dreams. She actively sought out conversations with anyone she knew who had experienced college, eagerly absorbing any information that could help us on our path. Each bit of knowledge she collected became another piece of the puzzle of higher education. In the face of uncertainty, she could have easily discouraged us from pursuing further schooling. Instead, she chose the tougher, less traveled route. My brother and I became the trailblazers among our extended family, the first to embark on and complete a postsecondary program.

Her unending encouragement and supportive guidance served as our guiding light in the unfamiliar world of academia. With each gentle nudge and uplifting word, she helped us navigate this new landscape. Her belief in our potential propelled us forward, instilling within us the confidence to pursue our dreams despite the challenges that lay ahead. In her steadfast determination and support, we found the strength to overcome obstacles and defy expectations. My mother’s legacy is not merely one of sacrifice but of empowerment—a testament to the transformative power of boundless love and determination.

Honoring My Hero

In my life, certainty can be scarce, but one constant has endured: the unwavering support, love, and encouragement of my mother. As Black History Month unfolds, it feels only fitting to elevate my mother as my hero—to cast light upon her, lifting her from the shadows where society often hides black women. Her strength, resilience, and boundless love have been my guiding light, illuminating the path forward through life’s twists and turns.

I hope to honor my mother by continually being the best version of myself. I honor my mother by raising our children to become thoughtful, driven, hard-working adults who care about others. Each day, I hear little things that she would say in my head. Aside from that, I talk to her most days. She taught me that life is better lived with a village. She always said that you can count your true friends on one hand. I draw my strength from my village, my mother, and of course, God.

When I think about my heritage, I think about all the sister-friends, adoptive aunts, and godmothers who made the world of this little black child go around every day. If it were not for this village of women, I shudder to think about where I would be. I celebrate every single mother, sister-friend, adoptive aunt, godmother, or any other woman who has taken on a role in helping to raise a child. I salute you and thank you for your sacrifice and love!

In a world where black women are too often relegated to the sidelines, my mother stands as a beacon of resilience and grace, defying stereotypes, and defying expectations. Her constant presence, her quiet courage, and her steadfast love have shaped me in ways I can hardly articulate.

So, as we honor the richness of Black history and celebrate the legacies of those who have paved the way, I pay tribute to my mother—the unsung hero whose strength and spirit have brightened my journey and inspired me to reach beyond the stars. In her, I find not only a source of boundless love and support but also a testament to the power and resilience of the human spirit.”

- Tassany C. Henderson, Ed.D