A journey of grit & determination

When one is overwhelmed with emotions, words are hard to find. For those living with Aphasia, it is anyway difficult to find words. Being overwhelmed with emotions or not, doesn’t really matter. One experiences a lot of frustration to get their thoughts, emotions and ideas across. It’s like being in a maze and feeling lost, even though you have a faint memory of the way out.

My husband, Vasant Salian has been living with Aphasia for the last 3 years. It was one of the effects of having suffered a brain stroke…just 2 months after we celebrated his 39th birthday.

He was the fittest person I’ve known all my life. He had been cycling to work daily for 5 years or so. He frequently rode 100 kms on weekends and had started riding 200 kms too. The stroke happened out of nowhere on one such ride, far away from home. We couldn’t get him the right kind of medical help in time. We, (the family and friends) often wonder ‘what if?’ What if we had known earlier that it was a stroke? What if we were able to rush him to a hospital that was equipped to diagnose and treat him earlier? What if the pandemic hadn’t begun a month after his stroke? What if he had access to better rehab facilities during lockdown? We live with these and many more ‘What if’s?’

While he has come a long way, it continues to be a long and arduous journey for him. Yet, he smiles a lot more than he did earlier. He laughs a lot more and cries a lot more too. His face is expressive of all the emotions he feels. He’s able to communicate what he wants to say through his actions and sometimes spelling a word out. His sense of humour is still intact and he often cracks us up with his funnies.

When you’re close to completing a 200 kms bicycle ride but instead wake up in a hospital bed with tubes sticking out of you, being unable to talk, unable to move your right arm and leg, imagine the kind of grit and resilience one would need to get through this ordeal.

He has always been confident and perseverant, surprising all the doctors who treated him. Some of them told us that he wouldn’t get this far. Some of them chose not to comment and encouraged us to try our best. We’ve had a lot of good help – doctors, nurses, attendants, instructors, therapists, nutritionists, counsellors, cyclists, coaches, trainers, singing teachers, music therapist, house help, drivers, friends who went out of their way to help in any way they could. Family who made us feel anchored through this storm. His organisation who stood by him, while he’s been on a health break.

Vasant kept smiling through it all. There were bad days. But then he’d bounce right back. He made it through lockdown.

For someone who has always been on time, time hasn’t really been on his side…or so it seems. When the lockdown happened it paused everything for Vasant to regain his strength and catch up with the world. However, it also limited his access to rehab facilities that were at covid risk.

Healing is a slow process. It takes its own path no matter what you do. The key is ‘Don’t give up. Be stubborn!’

We will continue to persevere because Vasant wants to and he believes in himself. We will continue to work towards his rehab and recovery of his right arm – wrist and fingers. His right leg – knee strengthening and ankle drop. He can’t run yet but I’m waiting for the day when he will run those marathons again. We have been told not to hope but then again, Vasant and I have always been rebels of a kind.

He’s now cycling on the tandem bicycle until he can find his balance and strength to ride a regular cycle all by himself. He’s cycled 28 kms last weekend in 3.5 hours.

Vasant has been an inspiration to me and so many others who have met him and experienced him. Today, on his 3 year stroke anniversary, I wanted to share a bit of his story with you too. And along with that, the gratitude that we feel towards so many who have been our lighthouse in this rough ocean. We’ve met so many new and wonderful people without whom, we wouldn’t have been able to get this far. There are far too many to mention and maybe most of them aren’t even on LinkedIn.

I hope our gratitude reaches each one and a bit of inspiration reaches you too.