Join us this week to challenge perfectionism in the aid sector
Gemma Houldey
Author, Keynote Speaker, Space Holder on Ending Burnout Culture in Humanitarian and Human Rights Movements
I am looking forward to resuming the Vulnerable Humanitarian Circle of Practice after the Christmas break, and this week we will be exploring perfectionsim in the aid sector.
Perfectionsim takes many forms - and I should know, as a recovering perfectionist who still backslides on a regular basis! In the humanitarian and human rights space there are specific ways in which perfectionism shows up. In my book, I talk about ‘the perfect humanitarian’. Here are some of their qualities:
The perfect humanitarian must be free of family responsibilities. Preferably single, with no plans for having children, so that they can be available 24/7 for their job - and assume that this is more important than anything else in their private life.
The perfect humanitarian must be strong and tough. Public displays of emotions, struggle, vulnerability are not welcome in the workplace when others are suffering far more than you are.
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Sound familiar in your work environment or even within yourself?
If it does, let me tell you now: this is not your fault. There is a system at play, both within organisations and society at large in many countries, that forgets we are human beings: with different interests, worries and doubts, flaws and limitations.
The best we can do is start to recognise this, for ourselves and for each other. To give a listening ear to where we might be struggling, where we feel we are failing or where we simply want to express our grief or our rage.
The Vulnerable Humanitarian Circle of Practice is your opportunity to pause and understand your own perfectionist tendencies, and with kindness and compassion see how you may move beyond this in ways that benefit you and bring radical change to your work environment.
Come along on either Tuesday 14th or Wednesday 15th, according to your time preference. I will share some of the systemic problems that lead us to be perfectionists, and we will explore practices to support you in challenging the ‘shoulds’, ‘people pleaser’ and ‘imposter syndrome’ that so often accompany perfectionist tendencies.
This is your chance to show up in your wholeness and messiness, and to come away feeling more more confident in transforming diminishing and exhausting habits and narratives into new stories, routines and practices that support your wellbeing. I hope to see you there!