John & Nicole: Goals & Themes

John: you had asked me the other day about what are my themes for 2021. I noticed you didn’t say goals – we had that talk last year. Goals set you up for failure while themes do not. I do not have any bias toward goals per se. But when you keep setting them higher and higher there is a chance that you won’t succeed with them, through no fault of your own. However, themes are different. If you set up good themes, then by doing them every day you set yourself up for greater success. Previously my themes have been around focus, finances, being a good person. This year the biggest one is congruency. Do what I say, say what I do all the time. Do my actions match my words. ALL THE TIME. If you said you are going to do something, do it. If you didn’t say you would do something don’t do it. That is the takeaway. For example, if I want to get together with a person and they say they need to check their schedule, and then I reply with, great, check it and get back to me, then I have to be good with that, no matter how long that takes. If they don’t, that is a response in itself, and probably they were not that close with me anyway. I am fine with that. Also, if I said I am going to do something, then I need to do it. Finish the report, turn in the paper, take out the trash. Kiss the girl. Whatever. You said you will do it – then do it. Be congruent. People will trust you and most importantly, you trust yourself.  

 Nikki, what are your themes for 2021 and how did you decide upon them? Did you look back at yourself to discover them or are they ideas and focus points that are different from last year?  

Nicole: John, I know you are a fan of themes and not so much goals. You have always been congruent with this thought process. When you say previously your themes were…why the change? I find it interesting that your theme is congruency. From as long as I’ve known you, you have always been congruent. When you say you are going to do something, you do it. I admire this characteristic in a human being. It shows me that you are honest and transparent. That in return gains trust. 

 My theme is to practice gratitude every day. Not just think it but say it. I think it’s important that you show and tell people that you care and appreciate them. It doesn’t cost a thing to say thank you and it takes one second to say it or write it.  

 John, thank you for writing this piece with me and helping me realize I needed to start writing again. You are a true inspiration. Keep doing what you do best.