The JOB of a godly father - unlocking generational blessings

It is said fatherhood is the hardest job in the world. Do you agree?

Every job has its job scope. What are some of the job scopes of a father that the Bible teaches us?

I can list 3 of them, although there are probably more. ?

1. To train up godly children: Proverbs 22:6 says, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it."

2.? To impart God’s values daily. Deuteronomy 6:6-7 commands us, "These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts.?Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up."

3. To be able to impact our children and the generation after them: This is a multi-generational call in Proverbs 13:22, "Leave an Inheritance to your children’s children"

Giant of Faith may not result in Godly Father.

If we can accept these as some of God’s idea of a good father, let’s us evaluate the following biblical heroes of faith about their fatherhood.

I am not discrediting all the fathers above. Noah is in my opinion one of the closest model father to fit the bill. I said almost. Let’s see. For 120 years, he managed to turn his sons away from the darkened world and even convinced his three daughters-in-law to stay focused on God’s task to build the Ark. That’s 100% of his family who did not turn away from God and stood firm for 120 years! No wonder Peter calls him the preacher of righteousness.

Unfortunately, Noah did not finished strong. His last action of drunkenness and laid a curse on his son Ham and his descendants was a BIG slip up that should not be ignored.

You get my point now. In fact, there were a few godly mothers mentioned, such as Hannah and Eunice (Timothy’s mother whom Paul praised), but godly fathers are conspicuously rare in the Bible.

No wonder the world does not celebrate Father’s Day as much as Mother’s Day.

A big reason I became a Christian only in my 30s was because I wanted a sound foundation to father my children. I think a lot about being a good dad. Hence, you can imagine how the relatively absence of biblical father role model had troubled me for some time. This is more than a pressing social issue; there is a greater concern if fathers do not rise up.

Malachi 4:5-6 gave a grave warning of the imminent need for godly fatherhood: “And he [Elijah] shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the child to their fathers, Iest I come and smite the earth with a curse.”

The 3 JOBs of a godly father

Very recently, a sister pointed my attention to JOB for my answer, widely believe as the oldest book of the Bible. That’s also the double meaning of this article's title. Let’s look into the Book of JOB.

I want to share 3 JOBs of a godly father that will bring generational blessings.

1. To be a model of Christ in the family

The FIRST JOB of a godly father we can learn from JOB is to Model Christ’s ministries in the family. International Bible teacher Derek Prince described the 3 roles of a father as a Priest, Prophet and King, with the Priest as the first and foremost role. In fact, these 3 roles are essentially what Jesus’ ministries on earth: to reconcile man to God, to proclaim the kingdom, and at his second coming to reign as King over His people.

How did JOB do in these three aspects?

Chapter 1 told us Job had ten adult children who lived on their own and probably had their own families. And they all respected him.

A.????? Priestly role

Job 1:4-6. During the weekly gathering and feasting among his children and children’s children, he discharged his priestly duty to offer a sacrifice to God, for “maybe in his children’s heart, they have sinned against God.” Job existed in a time before Abraham, before Levite duties, but he already understood the importance of intercessory prayer as the head of the household.

B. Prophet role

A Prophet proclaims God’s truth to man. An example, when God tested his faith by taking away his possessions, live stocks, all his children and caused him bodily sores from head to toe, his wife was so upset of his blind faith that she told him to curse God and die. But he replied, “Should we accept from God only good and not adversity?” There is reasons to believe that's how he taught and guided his children

C. Kingly role

JOB 31:13-40 described how he cared for his servants, he took care of the poor and the widow, when he sinned, he didn’t hide like Adam did.?

Job probably checked off all the list of Derek Prince’s definition of a good father. What were his rewards? All his ten adult children respected him and also was harmonious towards each other.

When I first came to RCA, a sister taught me how to pray intercessory prayers over my son because of his emotional dysregulation. One of the verses I prayed over him almost every night for a season was from Ephesian 3:14-19. Some of you may be familiar with this. It starts with “For this reason, I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name….” Incidentally, the Greek word for family in Ephesian has its root word as patria, the same root word as patriarch or father. So I know this verse is for me to pray over my son and the other 3 children and my wife. Countless nights later, my son became better in regulating his emotions. That's the power of priestly prayer from a father.?

2. Best husband to your children's mother?

The second JOB of a godly father is to be the best husband to their mother.

JOB 31:1: “I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman.”

Verse 9, he continued, “If my heart has been enticed?by a woman, or if I have lurked at my neighbor’s door, then may my wife grind?another man’s grain, and may other men sleep with her.”

Job's commitment to his one and only wife was extraordinary, long before the 10 commandments and in an era where polygamy was practiced everywhere else and the order of the day.

Do you know in Gen 2:18, that the Hebrew word for the helper God sent to Adam was called Ezer. This was not the inferior helper that modern days word translated to. Ezer was used a total of 21 times in the OT - 2 times to describe Eve, and 16 times to describe God the helper to man. It’s means rescuer, savior, ally. It’s the powerful, urgent and vital kind of help.

Husband, we need to recognize that Ezer in our wife. Many counsellors tell us that there is no effective parenting without a strong marriage. Likewise, a father cannot be loving towards his children without being first a loving husband to his wife.?

Sharing from my own journey, I had not been a loving husband to my wife for many years. I believe I am dutiful and responsible, but due to my upbringing, I lack gentleness, compassion and empathy towards Lynne.

In the first marriage retreat organized by my home church in 2019, the facilitator Steven Chan introduced this powerful phrase: From Husband and Wife to LOVER for LIFE. After the camp, I changed Lynne’s contact in my phone to Lover for Life, as a visual reminder of how I should cherish her. It has been 5 years now, and loving her has been a conscious effort for me. We still have our arguments, but that’s my commitment towards her, irrespective of what she does or behave.

Another point. Lynne also frequently reminded me not follow our kids to call her ‘mummy’. Fathers, do you also call your wives ‘mummy’? Words can subtly influence our thoughts. When we call our wives ‘mummy’, unconsciously, we begin to see her duty as a mum. And very often, we would project our frustration and disappointment with our kids to them.

Recently, after 19 years of marriage, I told her I want to court her as a girlfriend again. This is not some young man's romantism. Rather, it consciously makes me renew that initial sense of adore, respect and fondness of her, that 19 years of marriage and 15 years of parenting four kids can roughen and jaded.?

Have a Generational Mindset

The THIRD job of a godly father is to Have a Generational Mindset in our legacy plan

Job 42:15, Job left an inheritance to his 3 daughters along with their brothers, against the Mosaic law that came much later during the Exodus. This was an unusual estate distribution in a masculine culture where daughters were often disinherited and sons received double shares. Not only that, did you realize his three daughters were named? Job clearly went against social norms to love all his children equally.

In 2010, in my second year as an estate planner, God led me to a seminar entitled, The Christian perspective of estate planning. It was held in a church, but as a pre-believer, I decided to go and learn. Throughout the session, only one verse (that didn't have God or Jesus) stuck to my mind. That verse literally blew my mind and set me off on a transformational journey both professionally and personally.

Proverbs 13:22, "A good man [father] leaves an inheritance to his children’s children."

First, the word inheritance in this context refers to not only monetary wealth but values. The average Jews in Solomon times were NOT rich. Many were even slaves and definitely didn’t possess wealth to last three generations. That’s why the verse did not refer to a rich man or an old man. It was a good man, irrespective of their age and wealth.

I had not been a good father. But I think a lot of being one. Following that verse, I upgraded my Will in my estate plan to a values-driven trust that includes my future grandchildren. A Will strictly speaking is an instrument for a 2-generation wealth transfer, but I believed most in Singapore had the financial ability to pass down their wealth beyond three generations.

But a trust would be useless if the corresponding values transfer is missing. We do that through a family document called the Letter of Wishes attached to the Will or Trust document. Job was already one of the wealthiest man in his times but had it not been his own version of values transfer to the next generations, his children and grandchildren would not have lived in unity and harmony.

The true test of a good inheritance is that it should last three generations or more. Nowadays, my fatherhood end-game is not just to raise my four kids to be godly children. This is a good goal, but it shouldn’t stop there. I aspire to make them better parents than me towards their own children. That’s the true test of godly parenting. Multi-generational mindset.

Some of you fathers may feel a bit like me. It’s too late. My kids are grown up, and I have lost the golden years or growing up years to impact them or train them in the ways they should go. Now, they are rebellious, unkind to each other, total opposite of Job’s children. Friends, when Job’s children perished in the trial, God gave Job a second chance to raise another set of children. I believe it’s the same with us. Once we have a right understanding of who God the Father is, He will grant us another chance, definitely not another set of children, but another opportunity to impart our children. Or perhaps, it is towards our grandchildren. Generational mindset.? ?

The rewards of multigenerational blessings

What was the outcome of a generational mindset when it comes to inheritance planning.

The concluding verse of the book of Job says this: After this, Job lived a hundred and forty years; he saw his children and their children to the fourth generation.?And so Job died, an old man and full of years. Wow! Job was a great grandfather of a big tribe (10 children reproduced three times over) and extremely wealthy. Before he lost everything, he was already the richest man in the East. After his trials, God doubled everything! I don’t know about you, but I think Job is that archetypical father I want to study closely. What was his secret recipes shared from Chapter 2 to 41? I desire his unshakeable faith in God to achieve generational blessings for my family.??

A modern example: Jonathan & Sarah Edwards

There is another story outside the Bible about a JOB-type of father that brings generational blessing.? Jonathan Edwards, was a Puritan Preacher in the 1700s in the United States.? He was one of the most respected preachers in his day. He attended Yale at the age of thirteen and later went on to become the president of Princeton college. He married his wife Sarah in 1727 and they were blessed with eleven children. Every night when Edwards was home, he would spend an hour conversing with his family and then praying a blessing over each child. Jonathan and his wife Sarah passed on a great, godly legacy to their eleven children.

An American historian, A.E. Winship decided to trace the descendants of Jonathan Edwards almost 150 years after his death.?His findings are remarkable. The Edwards legacy produced 1,400 descendants by 1900 - all learned and of good character. Among them includes: 1 U.S. Vice-President, 1 Dean of a law school, 1 dean of a medical school, 3 U.S. Senators, 3 governors, 3 mayors, 13 college presidents, 30 judges, 60 doctors, 65 professors, 75 Military officers, 80 public office holders, 100 lawyers, 100 clergymen, and 285 college graduates.

Winship described, “There is scarcely a Great American industry that has not had one of this family among its chief promoters.”

President Roosevelt also gave the highest praise to Mrs Sarah Edward’s home-training for her children, “She who rocks the cradle rules the world”. “Has any other mother contributed more vitally to the leadership of a nation?”

To conclude: the three Jobs of a godly father that unlocks multigenerational blessings

• To model Jesus' ministries in the family - the role of a priest, prophet and king
• To be the best husband for the children's mother
• To have a multigeneration mindset in our legacy plan

I pray for every father including myself a fruitful and fulfilling fatherhood. ?