I’ve coached hundreds of women on their careers. Here’s what I’ve learned.

Let me preface this post with: this is not intended to be a political post. It’s not intended to be a feminist post. It’s not even intended to position me as an expert on women in the workplace.

I most certainly am not.

It’s merely to share with you some observations I’ve found over the past four years, as I’ve coached hundreds of men and women alike. By working with both women and men pretty equally, I’ve gotten a good handle on how work situations affect men and women differently as well as how men and women differently approach their careers.

Maybe you are a woman who identifies with some of these observations as being true for you…and maybe you don’t. There are actually a lot that don’t resonate with me and that’s okay.

For me personally, I’ve actually had a REALLY hard time identifying with the narrative in the media that says that women are hitting glass ceilings and aren’t given the same opportunities as men. While I have seen the statistics, that has just not been my personal experience. By working with other men and women though - specifically with women - I’ve been able to empathize with that experience and see that it’s not just a bunch of words, but a real concern for many women.

It’s humanized the headlines for me: Women have some battles up ahead.

HOWEVER! At the same time, I’m not a huge fan of letting it become a self-fulfilling prophecy for my clients. (Or for you, if you’re reading this!) In my coaching, I’ve encouraged these women to blast through their limiting beliefs and showed them that change is possible and success is attainable.

Let me also preface and say I’m not a scientist, I don’t have stats, and this is purely anecdotal and reflective of my own experience working with clients. It’s not a blanket statement for all women or all men. It’s JUST an observation. Take it or leave it.

The goal with this post is that if you DO resonate with some of these similarities I’ve found: You are not alone. And not only are you not alone, you can start taking action on remedying some of the lies that are keeping you stuck in your career.

Here are some things I’ve picked up along the way:

MEN & WOMEN BOTH STRUGGLE WITH CONFIDENCE.

Again, I’ve worked with men and women pretty equally over the past four years in my coaching business. And in my corporate life, I worked in predominantly male-dominated industries. Hear me when I say: women AND men both struggle with confidence. Women just tend to be more vocal about it.

I’ve had male clients that have choked up on the phone, beat themselves up, and told me that they felt that they were awful at their jobs. Women have done the exact same. Both feel the emotional weight of losing confidence at work. 

In my experience, men however, relate their confidence issues back to circumstantial evidence. For instance, maybe they lost their job or they keep getting poor reviews. Women on the other hand, have an innate belief/lie that they are not confident. That they are inherently not good at their work. It’s a different vantage point from which they see themselves. 

It infuriates me actually. Be gone, Satan! Seriously though, those are lies straight from hell. Do not give it a second thought that you aren’t worthy, good enough or talented enough. I’m a Bible girl, so when it says that Satan comes to steal, kill, and destroy…..you better believe I take that seriously. If you are hearing words that are coming to steal your joy, kill your spirit, and destroy your confidence….it is straight from the devil and is not how God intended it.

If this is you: 

Girlfriend, I am praying right NOW for you in this. I am praying that those lies leave your mind and heart today. But then I also pray that you do the deep work of remembering when you first heard that lie, understanding where it came from, and then make the decision right now to not let it run your life. I see so many women get stuck at this stage. They just sit and sit and sit in the hums of “not enough” and don’t evolve. You have GOT to step out of agreement with those lies and into agreement with who you know you were designed to be. 

 It’s a choice. Once you realize that you’re someone who struggles with confidence in your career, you can decide to wallow in it (become a victim) or start making the small, brave steps to move past it (become a champion). 

 Speak words of affirmation over your life...and then believe them to be true. If you want more resources on how to use these confidence boosts in your life, I partnered with Marigold to create some awesome, digestible content to help you boost your career confidence in 5 minutes a day. Get 50% off the yearly subscription using JENA50 at checkout.

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