It’s Time To Put Yourself First!

You’ve heard the lines:?You can’t pour from an empty cup!?Put your life vest on first!?In the event the oxygen masks drop, put your mask on first before helping others.?Sure, sure, sure!?That sounds great!?It is easier said than done!?Do we do it? ?I see you all lowering your heads as you say to yourself, NO! ?How do I know??I did it as a mom for years overextending myself for others and not taking care of me! ?Super Mom, Super Nurse, wife, and now family caregiver.?Luckily, I learned how to take care of myself first to give more to overs over the past 6 years.???

Little did I know that learning to be unapologetic in putting my selfcare and health first, it would serve me well to being in this current season.?What am I talking about??Last week, I reflected on what dealing with my dad’s dementia has taught me.?Every day continues to teach me more about patience and the importance of keeping a routine for him.?We don’t rush because rushing leads to confusion.?Lists are his life.?Checking in is important and visiting frequently gives him something to look forward to.

It pains me to see him search for words and not remember things like where he had lunch earlier in the day, recall what he ate or even recall the name of the family friend that so graciously takes him to breakfast on Sundays.?I can see he is realizing his short-term memory is failing him and he realizes we are trying to keep him safe and in his familiar surroundings as long as possible. ?Being the fixer, it is so hard to watch him struggle and slowly loose his independence.?My nursing background lends itself to want to help people.?I can only make every day a good day for him!?We go back to see his doctor in a few weeks, and they will consider adding and 2nd medication to help him.?At that time, we’ll have further discussions about living arrangements.?Sadly, he doesn’t remember being present for the conversation where he was told he should no longer drive.

People have asked me to write about how to take care of the caregiver!?Many things are common sense steps.?We have to take control and change our mindset to fill your cup first.?Whether it be caring for an elderly parent, a spouse, or a child with all the other millions of obligations we have, it has to start with selfcare.?Selfcare isn’t trips to the hair salon, retail therapy or a girl’s weekend away.?It is the daily check list of basic care:?Healthy eating, hydration, exercise, down time, sleep! Where have you heard that before?

Here are a few other tips to consider:?

?? Plan breaks during the day.?Get out and walk to relax, clear your head, and recharge.

?? Relax by reading or journaling to decompress at the end of the day.

?? Give yourself grace each day by using positive affirmations.

??? If you are religious, you can pray and seek support from your higher power.

?? Try meditation or practice yoga.?These activities help you center yourself and clear your mind.

?? Be sure to maintain your nutrition to give you energy and to support your immune system.

?? Be sure to stay hydrated with water.?Avoid excess caffeine and alcohol.

?? Get plenty of sleep.?Ask for help so care can be given in shifts if needed.

?? Be in the moment when you are around family and friends.?This means to be physically and emotionally present with others.?Don’t take this time for granted.

?? Ask for and accept help from others and know your limitations.?Have alternate plans in place for the next steps in care.?

Take Action!

Self-care is not about being selfish.?It is about taking time to give yourself the oxygen you need so that you can maximize your ability to care for others. ?If you neglect caring for yourself, it will lead to health problems such as high blood pressure, diabetes, obesity, and even personal relationship problems.

If you are currently a caregiver and you are not taking time for your own selfcare, it is time for a family huddle!?It is time to start!??

If you are a current healthcare provider burning your candle at both ends and burning yourself out, it is time for you to start selfcare! Would you tell your patients to neglect themselves like you are neglecting yourself??Absolutely not!?Practice what you preach!

If you know you will be faced with caring for a family member one day, start your selfcare routine now so that you will have a routine and the right mindset in place for when you need it later in life!?Your loved ones will need you!?

What season of life are you in now??Caring for a child, another family member??Perhaps you are a burnout caregiver in your professional role.?Taking these tips to heart will energize you to serve others better!?

Please share this with those you know can benefit from these tips.?Help them by helping them be accountable to themselves!?Help them put their oxygen mask on first each and every day!?