It's Time to Come Undone

Welcome to the Emotional Mastery Newsletter with Moksha Grace Coaching.

A weekly newsletter bringing you new perspectives and shining a light on some common missteps and limiting beliefs that hold us back on our path to emotional liberation.

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If you’re just getting to know me, my name is Michelle and I am an Emotional Liberation Coach.

I guide clients through releasing limitations and learning to work with their emotions so that they can show up more fully in every area of their lives.

When I left my role in corporate healthcare, it took me a while to go through my closet.?

Partially because I wasn’t sure what direction I wanted to go in my career. Partially because there was a part of me that didn’t want to let go of the amazing work I did in my role.

So I saved all my dresses and suits for four years.?

When I started to go through them, one of the dresses had a thread loose at the bottom.

As I often do, instead of grabbing scissors I tried to tear off the loose thread.?

When I did that, the whole dress started to unravel.?

It reminded me of how I felt before I left my corporate position.

At the time I didn't know what was happening, but I felt out of control, I felt lost, and I didn't know who to turn to or who to trust. I was frantically looking for somebody who would give me answers.

I got some answers, like:?

• “Move on!”
• “Conform!”
• “Toughen up!”
• “You’re going to have to accept it and be happy you have a job.”

But those weren’t going to work for me. I was only looking for the ones I wanted to hear.

And so I started to unravel just like the hem of that dress. My thread was being pulled and I was coming undone.?

I remember I would walk through the halls and wonder who knew what was really going on or how I was feeling. It always felt like there were eyes on me - watching, waiting, expecting.?

Was any of that real? Probably not. But it felt real.?

There were plenty of times towards the end of that career that I would make excuses to stay in my office because I didn't even want to be seen.?

When a bully tells you enough times that there are “a lot of people out there who don’t like you”, at some point, you start to believe it. If you don’t have the tools to work through it. Which I didn’t at the time.

When we're coming undone and we're hoping for someone to guide us, even voices spoken through a forked tongue can start to sound helpful.?

And so I isolated myself until the end of that career.

The thing is, I didn't stop the unraveling. I didn't even know I was being unraveled or coming undone. When the hem was finally out and the thread was no longer holding anything together, I didn't know who I was because I had tried to conform to what everybody wanted me to be.?

Including the coaches that the company assigned to me. Their main prerogative, however, was to ensure I played the part the business needed. They weren't coaching me to be the best me.

I even had a therapist say, “Just put your armor on and take it”.

That didn't make sense to me. It still doesn’t.

Now being years away from the situation, I look back and know that I stood up for what was right and I would make the same decisions all over again.

That’s not to say I didn’t have a lot of anger and resentment though. I used to get so anxious even driving by the buildings that I would break out in hives.?

So I worked with my own coach who was able to help me pull out the rest of the thread still stuck and replace it with a new hem.

When you’re in the midst of this type of experience - where you feel like everything is falling apart and you're coming undone (or on the brink of it) - it’s scary. You don't know where you're gonna end up.

What's on the other side of coming undone??

When we come undone, in all of that chaos, is where we find rebirth.?

The death of something always gives birth to something new.?

In that unraveling, you’re left with a pile of thread. And you get to decide what you're going to do with it.?

Some pieces of the thread may be knotty, and we cut those off. Much like emotions and memories that no longer serve us.

The rest of the thread is woven together to create something new.?

Out of chaos, everything is born. So we have to come undone.?

When we come undone, we get to unlearn things that we once thought were true and give up old limiting beliefs.?

What's meant to stay is going to stay. What's meant to go is going to go. It’s unavoidable.

If at your core you feel that something is not right, it’s not right. Something needs to be addressed.

In an alternative Universe, I could have decided to push through and heal what needed to be healed within me to be able to withstand the negativity I faced. But I don’t believe that was the journey meant for me.

So if you feel like you're unraveling…

If you feel like things are coming undone…

If you feel like your emotions are warning you that something is going on…

There's something seriously going on.?

And what's on the other side is not bad. It's actually good.

Just like I got rid of all those dresses, when you clear out what you don’t want, you have space for what you do.

In that space, you can welcome beautiful opportunities and experiences.?

A perfect example - Yesterday, I was driving in my car and my windshield was a mess. My daughter said, “Why don't you use the wipers and clean the windshield?”

I said, “Because I think that if I do that, it's just going to get dirtier.”

She insisted, so I used the cleaner. And you know what??

It took a couple of sprays, but that windshield became clean, and I could see clearly.?

When things aren’t perfect, we may be afraid to make changes because things could get worse. But they can just as easily get better.

Celebrate the coming undone.?

Let it all go. Let that hem come out. Clean out that closet. Make space. Open your heart to receive what is on its way to you.?

It's the best thing you can do for yourself and an amazing gift.

It's also an amazing gift to give to everyone who loves and cares about you.?

I followed the path and it led me right here. It led me to the clients that I now get to help because of these experiences.?

So welcome it in. Use the last three months of 2024 to pick up the pieces of what you want to keep, get rid of the old, and make space in your closet for all the cool stuff that's coming your way.

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