It’s Subtle
Joy Youell
SEO & AI Consultant and Speaker | B2B Marketer | Deep thinker, community builder, happy human
It’s a weird moment to remember, but I can still recall it with absolute clarity:
I’m on a video call interview for a consulting gig at a pretty large company.
The woman is German and has swooping platinum blonde bangs.
She asks the boilerplate questions - my experience, perspective, etc.
I answer. She nods along.
Then, in a micro-instant, she looks away from the screen, then looks back and…
…I knew I didn’t get the job.
Nothing changed. Nothing was said.
She didn’t perceptibly wrinkle her nose, exhale forcefully, purse her lips, or give any other physical indicators.
I didn’t do or say anything wrong. I just knew that I wasn’t what they were looking for.
The subconscious is a vast and wonderful thing.
“The unconscious mind is still viewed by many psychological scientists as the shadow of a ‘real’ conscious mind, though there now exists substantial evidence that the unconscious is not identifiably less flexible, complex, controlling, deliberative, or action-oriented than is its counterpart.”
**
I think love is the best place to catch your subconscious in action.
Why do we fall in love?
No one knows.
Why do we love our mates?
No one can really say.
**
There are two schools of thought about the subconscious - one says it controls everything and we’re powerless against it; the other says it controls nothing and just think, you idiot.
I don’t know that an ontological debate is relevant.
What is relevant is that we honor the fact that something in our beings - perhaps something spiritual or psychical or cerebral - is capable of meticulous, lightning-speed perceptions.?
And if we slow down enough to let our processing speed catch up, we can often realize
we know something we didn’t think we know…
we saw something we didn’t realize we saw…
we've already made a decision...
we are certain which path to take or what an outcome will be.
**
There are two resources I can’t leave out of this.
1-
“Insight is not a lightbulb that goes off inside our heads. It is a flickering candle that can easily be snuffed out.”
Malcolm Gladwell, Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking
2-
“we can be blind to the obvious, and we are also blind to our blindness.”
Daniel Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow