Is it our flaws and failings that make us more human ...

Many stories explain how the beautiful art form - Kintsugi - was invented. My favourite tells of a perfect bowl made for a Chinese Emperor. As the potter goes to present the gift, she slips on the polished marble floor, drops the bowl, and watches it break. Feeling humiliated, she fears she has dishonoured her family and her Emperor? Death itself may be on the cards! But the Emperor takes pity, he liked the bowl, and asks her to repair it and bring it back to him. Since that time, the repair of bowls with golden inlay's has become much prized, and the story so famous, that it is trotted out as part of a #wellbeing mantra that tells us how our flaws are the most beautiful aspects of our personalities. Yet such saccharine explanations jar with most people's lived experiences. Instead, the real world likes to pretend that we can be perfect! Witnesses the perfectly honed profiles on Linked in, curated lifestyle choices on Facebook, and 'fashion shoot' poses on tic toc & 'insta'. Whilst we all know this relentless perfection is fake, it still makes us uncomfortable when we don't match up. Orwell called it the 'tyranny of perfection'. At a deep level our human desire to fit in with the tribe means that if we don't have 'that' perfect outfit, brand of shoes, or body shape', then we fall down the human pecking order! And there is no escape! Wall to wall social media has created an immersive inadequacy experience. No wonder so many feel the need to wear a 'mask' 24-7!! But doing so has a corrosive effect on our sense of self, our #wellbeing, and dare I say - our souls. It is creating a sense of inadequacy driven by consumerist forces, whose powers persuade us, this is the only way to live. With 5 hours spent daily on social media young people bear the brunt of this assault on our idea of self and what makes us worthy as people. They are swimming in a sea of #insecurity and it is fuelling a #mentalhealth crisis, that is now all too evident.

How then might we help find more solid ground?

Listening to @BBC4 'In Our Time' BBC Sounds - I caught snatches of Melvin Bragg exploring the story of 'Julian of Norwich' a woman who advised that it is only when we get things badly wrong (or sin, as she might have put it), that we learn about who we really are..... She believed that it is only then, that we can ask others for #forgiveness and be forgiven. She observed that through the acknowledgement of our imperfections we learn humility , and - 'through this process start to respect the imperfection and #humanity in others'. To put this 14th Century Anchoresses wisdom into current day psychological speak. We only grow as people where it is possible to fail, and when we are encouraged to take accountability for our actions.

But anyone who has spent any time in a big corporates or government departments knows, finding such environments is as rare as hens teeth! Indeed - Covering our tracks when we fail is a cultural trait we see all too often at the root of scandal (Anyone watching the covid enquiry knows lying comes easier than facing the music).

We also know from our personal lives, that being in trusting #relationships helps us relax and be #honest enough to say we got things wrong. It is here then that the bonds of trust are formed, precisely because forgiveness for failure is possible. Such relations do take time but become strong because we show our partners that we are #human too. Such openness breeds #solidarity and the prospect of deeper fulfilment.

Whilst it is sadly lacking in in so many places, fostering forgiveness might be the human glue that fills cracks in broken organisations and builds back the #resilience needed in uncertain times. Perhaps more importantly remembering that to 'err' & stumble is what actually makes us all More Human may help rebuild environments in which 'people can be people' instead of pretending to be perfect. In the end it might be the only thing that differentiates us from the AI that Elon Musk tells us is coming to steal our jobs!

For more on this kind of thing do check out Association of Camerados , A Blueprint for Better Business , Together for the Common Good , Jenny Sinclair , Loughlin Hickey , Charles Wookey , Soulla Kyriacou , Maff Potts , Leeds Church Institute , Leeds Trinity University