It’s not only men cheat, women are equally cheaters
Painting by my friend Sudeep Mukhopadhaya

It’s not only men cheat, women are equally cheaters

It’s not that only men has the privilege to cheat on their wives, a good percentage of women are into romance and sexual satisfaction without any intention or plan of divorcing their husbands. In western countries it was and is common. No one bothers much. No one much talk about it. Still cheating is cheating and this cheating when caught has its own effect on the life of one who cheats  

This phenomenon has started in India with the change in socio culture. Reasons may be varied and can be cited with a brief elaboration.

 Women who are quite social, moves in a society, take drinks with lots of her close male friends tend to develop relationships. Relationship of love and sex! It is quite natural when women drinks in the company of male friends, sooner or later will get intoxicated and once one is in the intoxication stage wants more of everything.

 Women who are alcoholics are tending to cheat because in intoxication they shed their inhibitions. One get bold as their judgement to think good or bad is impaired.  

One opens one’s heart. Human body has sexual needs and when one is in the stage of intoxication, sexual desires rises. If the chance given and there is an opportunity there for male and female together in a room, it is quite difficult to curb the desires at that time. Man is always there to take women in his arms and once the women come in arms then she forgets whether she is married or not. She wants to just fulfil her instant desires. Fire within women is much more than a man. Man at time can control but when women get hot, it is difficult for her to control till she is made cool.

May be these days women are socially active and when she finds that her close female friends are cheating their husbands and enjoying the relationships, they also tend to land on the same ground. What I hear quite often from the horses mouth that women at time talk much dirtier then what male conversations used to. Sangat ka asar toh ho hi jaata hai. Effect of the company is always there.

Some women are quite materialistic and could be easily seduced by wealthy man in lure of making them buy expensive gifts and even providing cash as and when she needed.

 

Like men, certain women are sex maniac and their thoughts always go around how to seduce a man and satisfy their sexual desires. Women who has much more sex drive than their husband she is again vulnerable to cheat their husbands. Present day there is so much is there on internet that one tends to experiment what all one sees. Different way of sex being used by different men makes women try all. And when she finds her husband lacks all the skills she sees, curiosity of to try all those tend them to cheat their husbands.

While other does it to get the thrill of doing something forbidden and are ready to take risk. They are basically planners who plan in such a way not to be caught. It’s their lust which makes them indulge into such extra martial relations without any intention of divorcing their husbands. Most of the women who are into extra marital relations has no desire to leave their husbands. They are the one who kept on reminding their lovers about their overt love for their husband and pose a rosy picture of their love towards their hubby to their lover.

 One thing typical in most of women is that unlike men who have the habit of having multiple relationships, women prefer to have one at a time which satisfies her emotional as well as sexual needs. Men are much smarter than women as far as their commitment is concerned and like women they are also quite careful about the other women’s demand on him to leave their wife and that is one of the reason  they tend to have multiple relationship.

 Women look for love and attention much more than men. If at times husband fails to give the required attention women wants, then she tend to look towards others who pays her the attention and show love and care for them. She becomes quite an easy prey for men and they take full advantage of her state of mind with pretending all love and care for her.

 It is said that with a passage of time love increases. But it is other way round also that the longer the relationship, the quality and the frequency of sex between spouses get fade. And in this case women who have a tendency to get bored easily cheat on her husband just for excitement and to alleviate her boredom. Getting used to be the same body and in turn get bored takes away intimacy of excitement of relationship.

 An ambitious lady who wishes to do things on her own like starting her own business and if the husband doesn’t care and give node for it then she look forward to others who encourages her to fulfil her ambitions. I have seen couple of beautiful ladies who had ambition to become an actress in some corner of their mind first cheated their husband and then eventually left them to fulfil their ambition of becoming an actress. They became actress or not is immaterial. In fact I had seen many who left their husband to become an actress but landed in trap.

 Number of cases where women husband cheats her she tends to equal the score by cheating him in return. It is way of taking revenge of many women. When they find their husband is cheating them, then they get an excuse also to say if caught that when you can cheat I also have the equal right to cheat, where is the problem?

 Scolding of husband all the times makes women look for someone who listen to her and her problem. Certain husbands due to their male ego always tend to make their wives small. I have come across many couple where wife is quite simple, beautiful and above all earning more than their husbands. Still their husbands don’t leave any opportunity to pass some remarks or say something in a taunting way which instantly hits women heart. And this frustration of her takes them away from their husbands.

 Adoring, caring and getting attention from others sometimes goes to women head. Praises makes women soft. Soft to man who praise her like she is a fairy, she is a princess and there is no other beautiful women is there like her in the whole world. She knows very well about her still she loves to be praise and become sexually vulnerable to man. And more women comes in man’s fold when he praises her body, her eys, her lips, her boobs, her belly, her legs and all as her husband stopped praising her body in a period of time and this is the weakness of a women to be praised..sacchi or jhoothi wotever.

 Any women or a girl who love to be a part of party crowd all the time, specially night parties, become vulnerable to cheat his husband or boyfriend as there are all the reasons for the same. She has the opportunity as I already stated somewhere as and when opposite sex gets the opportunity to be alone, chances of sexual interaction increases.

 Most of the women are scared of get caught as that will be going to ruin their family life, they know it quite well. Sometime when accidently they come to cheat and they didn’t got caught, they get bold and tend to cheat again.

 

Certain women, by basic nature are players. They enjoy playing love game with men as it is their time pass and in this process they get caught in their own weaven web in a period of time and then they accuse and abuse the male counterpart that he trapped her with a planning.

 A woman who has been to many sexual encounters finds herself helpless and it is difficult for her to be and remain as one man’s wife. On the other side, a women who has not encountered any sexual experience before marriage may also tend to experience the hidden pleasure of having sex with some other guy and see the difference in between his husband’s and the other guy. And once she tastes and like the fruit of some other guy , she tends to cheat over and again to have taste of more forbidden fruits.

 Loneliness is again a factor makes any women vulnerable to cheat. Loneliness again are of two types. Husband is away for his business or doing service away from his home town and wife is alone living and taking care of children. Secondly, sometimes being together, living together itself one is lonely as there is hardly any communication between them. In both circumstances women want to get rid of her loneliness and find someone who takes away her loneliness.

 It’s a saying “ Ishq aur musk chupaaye nahi chupta” Love and fragrance can not be hidden. Most of love cheatings other partner comes to know but most of the time at the last and that is the time when the other partner already travelled lot of distance and gone ahead quite far. Intelligent ones come to smell the fragrance of his or her partner from the expressions of other faces. When someone’s partner is in cheating mode, his actions starts telling provided the other person is a little bit intellectual to read the facial expressions.

 Men at times are more possessive to their wives. Their cheating on their wives has many other reasons than wives cheat their husband. As already stated by me, unlike women, men tend to cheat with many women at a same time. Many of the time, they make it clear to the partner with whom he is having an affair about his intentions of having affairs with her and also makes it clear not to demand anything like leaving his spouse.

 Interesting part of this cheating story is that through out history and through out in the world man is being called macho and a stud, guy who is truly a man and on the other side women is being called a slut while she is having multiple partners.

 A big question now comes “Whether traditional marriage fits into the present day glamorous and busy life. The way there is an increase in percentage of divorce cases in India, a day is not far that good percentage of people will choose living relationship instead of being tied in marriage relationship. The system of marriage and having love and sex with just one person for whole life has almost failed at world level.

 This is Kalyuga and as time will go passing, adultery, cheating, infidelity, incest and all other alike one can think of will increase with the passage of time.

 Feeling like writing real life stories of many women I came across in my life time knows who cheated. Many of them are living happily without their husbands knowing about it, many of them had big fights and living again happily with their hubbies amd many of them had to face the separation after their husband came to know about their cheating. 

(c) Raj Chawla

Copyright Raj Chawla

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