It's okay to not be okay right now

"How you doing?"

"Good, a little tired. I worked late again after the kids went to bed. Don't mind the noise in the background. " ::awkward laugh::

If you're reading this right now, there is an extraordinarily high likelihood you've had this exact conversation in the last two weeks. Perhaps you heard this from a co-worker? Maybe you've said these words yourself?

I think it's time to be honest with each other. It's okay to not be okay, to not be good, to not be well, or not be hanging on. It's okay to be overwhelmed, exhausted, anxious and struggling to maintain concentration.

It's really important to note that it's not just people with children. It's everyone. While some are overwhelmed with the chaos of their household, others are deafened by the absolute silence. People who live alone, are feeling really alone right now. If they weren't New York animal shelters wouldn't be running out of dogs to foster. 

Honestly, it's okay to not be okay right now.

There are some among us who truly want to be buried in work right now. Business as usual is the exact medicine they need to forget about the world outside. For those people you need to communicate this to the others around you. Tell the people nearest you that you're heads down in all business mode and don't want to open up every meeting with 10 minutes reviewing the current days statistics. That's perfectly okay.  

There are others out there refreshing their news feeds, looking for the most up to date metrics, watching press conferences, while battling for normalcy and finding it hard to focus. For them it feels weird to keep opening their laptop and taking calls as usual. The uncertainty consumes them. That's perfectly okay.

There is nothing wrong with either reaction or any reaction in between. There are many unknowns right now in our lives and our business. We are all managing our own realities and the realities of those closest to us. Whether you have a loved one who is fighting on the front lines, been deemed essential, or filing for unemployment, it will weigh on you. It's okay to recognize, it' really okay to not be okay.  

Most likely will not emerge from this situation looking like we did before. Things will be different, we will be different.  I live in the shadow of New York City, in an area wedged between Westchester County - NY and Fairfield County - CT. The nearest hospital to me has dubiously honor of having the first confirmed cases of COVID-19 in Connecticut. Today that hospital put out a message asking for ordinary citizens to donate Clorox, peroxide and bleach wipes.

Let me say it again louder for the back of the room: My local hospital needs basic, essential supplies to clean and disinfect. 

These are not ordinary times. I need everyone to know, we can say that out loud. It's okay to not be okay.  

Yes, I'm getting on with work. Keeping things moving. Having virtual happy hours with my friends and using video chat to stay connected to my co-workers. I am also contemplating what happens if we have an emergency and need to get to a local hospital which is likely to be overrun with sick patients in the coming weeks and running out of cleaning supplies.

Yes, I am focused on activities which bring my mood up, I'm working out on my Peloton and taking breaks from the news. I am also worrying for all of my friends, especially those who are in medicine, I worry for my own elderly parents, I worry for my clients and our industry as it navigates these waters.  

 So let's just get it out there one more time, it's okay to not be okay.

But let's be not okay together. Let's be one big team of not okay.

Let's keep checking in on each other, keep having virtual happy hours. Let's keep fostering animals and donating supplies to our local hospitals. Let's keep sharing (and making) funny videos and memes. Let's keep thanking our front line workers and sharing optimism with our unemployed acquaintances. Let's be not okay together.