"It's OK to not be OK"

May 2023 – Mental Health Month

Michael Peterson

May is Mental Health Month and I title this article with “It’s OK to not be OK” as a launching pad for my feelings and thoughts about Mental Health today.?That saying has been around for a couple of years and it’s one of the best ways to convey the message without mentioning Mental Health specifically.

Mental Health discussions still bear a stigma of somehow making you less of a person and being weak.?I grew up when Mental Health just wasn’t discussed and you were told to “Suck it Up”, “Be a Man”, “Men don’t Cry”, and the list can go on.?For much of my life, I approached Mental Health discussions and my struggles like the proverbial Male Driver, in the era of paper maps, that even though he didn’t where he was going……there was no way he was stopping for directions.?But, just like paper maps being replaced by GPS and virtual maps, my beliefs had to change……for me and the people around me.

There are days when I struggle with confidence, surety of direction and purpose.?As the author of “Embrace the Rising Sun”, I try to approach each day with an attitude of making each new sunrise an opportunity to be better with a clear mind and a confident heart.?But you know what??Some days, that’s just a mask and I still struggle with the thoughts of “Suck it up Big Boy” because I don’t want others to know that I struggle too.?For me……writing about these struggles is often easier than talking out loud, I am still not the person that’s going to start the conversation about my mental health, it’s far easier for me to write about it and have someone ask me…..”How are you doing today”……and mean it.?Even then, the easy answer is “I’m good”, when I’m not.?It’s not about the trust I have in people, it still the stigma in my mind that “It’s OK to not be OK” isn’t…..

It helps when people in the news, sports stars & names we all know talk about their mental health and take time away from their passions to take care of themselves, but it still comes down to me and my feelings about the topic.?I’m getting better, but there are still times……and there will be times in the future where I’ll take the easy path and be “good”.?Like many the mantra of “It’s OK to not be OK” must beat like a drum in my head and overtake the drum beat of the past and the stigmas attached.

Mental Health is not to be a focus for a month-only, but it’s a start and you cannot achieve anything good by waiting it out.?Nothing ever changes if you don’t take that first step.?But it’s also a reminder that if you’re feeling the strain/pain, so are others.?I’m not as good as others about asking people…..”How are you doing?” and mean it.?This road goes both ways and often the prescription for your own success starts with assisting others.?When you feel like it’s only “me”, it’s hard to think about “we”.

I encourage you all to reflect on your mental health this month, it’s impossible to “be good” every day and when you don’t to talk about it and seek assistance.?It’s only by acknowledging the opportunities in you that we do the work to improve and grow.