"It's Not My Fault"

Mutually accusatory conflicts seem pervasive, and they seldom lead to effective problem-solving.

But, humans have always struggled with taking responsibility and it’s perceived to be much less painful to blame others rather than to beat ourselves up!

Human nature being what it is, as individuals in our daily lives, we have a tendency to hold others responsible, or in other words, blame others, when we are not getting our needs met or our goals achieved.

If we choose to continue on the path of blaming others, it basically means we have no desire or need to take concrete steps to find actual solutions.

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind – Mahatma Gandhi

Read the statements below and assess if any of them resonate with you:

• It’s not my fault that I lost my job, the entire economy is shattered due to Covid-19
• It’s not my fault that I am overweight – it runs in the family
• It’s not my fault that the task was incomplete or delayed, all members did not work as a team
• It’s not my fault that I am late, there is just too much traffic in the city and bad infrastructure
• It’s not my fault that customer is angry, the quality team was ignorant
• It’s not my fault that……

The catch is that there is a difference between finding faults to blame others and taking responsibility for oneself. Learning the difference between the two is life-changing. 

Just because something may not be your fault, that does not mean it is not your responsibility.

• Covid-19 may not be your fault, but it is your responsibility to up-skill and be employable again
• Overweight may run in the family, but it is your responsibility to manage it
• It may not be your fault that the members did not work as a team, but it is your responsibility to complete the task on-time
• It is not your fault that there are traffic jams in the city, but it is your responsibility to find alternatives or start earlier
• It may not be your fault that the customer is angry, but it is your responsibility to ensure good quality

As Stephen Covey in his famous book “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” taught us.

Be Proactive – Do not be a victim of your circumstances, rather choose to be a product of your own actionable choices.

You cannot change the past, but you can choose to manage and take the present head-on.

It may not be your fault – but that does not mean it is not your responsibility. Chances are good that it is.

Originally published on - https://www.vineetsethi.com