It’s Not Me, It’s You

Followers, contacts, likes, clicks, retweets…in today's world, it's easy to mistakenly believe that a person's popularity translates into leadership ability. However, despite the fact that we have a favorable approval rating, we may not have a positive long-term impact on others. The opposite is also true: it's possible to be at the head of a group, but the group may secretly hate our guts. There is however a rare breed that can have their cake and eat it, in other words, successfully rally people to move toward a constructive vision while being liked, admired, and supported. To join this exclusive club, we must first determine whether or not true leaders are born or made. This is a question philosophers, historians, and psychologists have grappled with throughout history. The best estimates offered by research hint at leadership being about one-third born and two-thirds made. This is encouraging news because it shows that we can indeed grow into leaders (it comes as no surprise to a USD366 billion global leadership industry ).

In Great Leaders , Simon Johnson presents the biographies of some of the greatest political and military masterminds of the last quarter of a century. Three of them stand out, starting with Napoleon Bonaparte, who rose to prominence during the French Revolution. He was a strategic thinker, an efficient organizer, a multi-tasking prodigy, a master of publicity, and a deft shaper of public opinion. But don't think he was born with such a diverse collection of abilities. Napoleon was a lifelong learner who was always striving to better himself and gain knowledge that would aid him in future endeavors. To represent the strategic advantage that learning affords us, he coined the expression "Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."

Another outstanding example is Abraham Lincoln. He was approachable, truthful, and caring. He was aware of his flaws, and as a result, he was able to collaborate with others, accepting advice and criticism frequently. Lincoln was compassionate, expressing concern and seeking to comprehend others' worries. He acted with humility, fairness, and kindness toward everyone he met. When Lincoln talked, he did so authoritatively, but also with a sense of humor. "If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?" he would often ask his troops, partly to amuse them and keep their spirits up, but also to reassure them about the trust they had placed in him.

Finally, consider Winston Churchill, who, in addition to being a successful politician, was also a remarkable lifelong speaker. Or was he? Churchill, according to Johnson, was born with a handicap that prevented him from thriving in school and, as a result, from having an innate ability to address audiences. However, over time, he developed into a skilled orator, studying the world's greatest works and borrowing eloquent tactics from them. Churchill used to rely on careful planning and meticulously crafted scripts for his speeches. He thought that hard effort paid off, and as a result, had clerical assistance to take dictation at any hour and in any location, whether at his desk, in his bed, or in his bath. " Continuous effort – not strength or intelligence – is the key to unlocking our potential," he said.

To summarize, these leaders teach us three qualities: humility to learn, empathy to connect, and passion to strive. Now, there's a fourth one that I believe deserves special attention: real leaders recognize that they can influence others because they serve a purpose. John Maxwell explains in The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership that, contrary to popular belief, the bottom line in leadership isn't how far we develop ourselves, but how far we advance others. Serving people and giving value to their lives is one way to accomplish this. Are we improving the lives of those who follow us? If we can't say yes without hesitation, we might as well be subtractors. Maxwell recommends that we make "adding value" a part of our daily routine, starting with those closest to us. To do so, we shall consider how we can help the people on our list based on what they value rather than what we want.

So, leaders are formed through serving others before themselves. The origins of this dynamic can be traced back hundreds of thousands of years to the appointment of alpha males and females by early humans. We are a species that evolved during a time when resources were scarce and dangers were numerous. The tribe was better equipped to deal with the uncertainty of the outside world because of the safety given by a strong leader. In his book Leaders Eat Last , Simon Sinek expands on this principle, explaining that "eating last" is rewarded with loyalty and hard work. People reciprocate our protection with strong allegiance when we fulfill the anthropological role of an alpha, which is to safeguard those in our tribe. They do it because they want to, not because they are obligated to.

It will take time and effort to instill these four characteristics in our life. It will also demand the development of values such as patience and diligence, both of which will help us become better leaders. Do you wish for more? Let's go on to the fifth and final trait, which many people believe we are born with or without. This is charisma, or the capacity to captivate and inspire others. Researchers from the University of Lausanne identified 12 ways to learn charisma and become more powerful, trustworthy, and leaderlike, according to the Harvard Business Review . Using metaphors, similes, and analogies, telling stories and experiences, and showing confidence that high goals can be accomplished are all examples of verbal techniques. In addition, facial expressions and gestures are nonverbal cues that help us connect with others.

I can see Napoleon on the battlefield, oozing confidence and radiating a victorious aura. Or Lincoln offering a reassuring smile to the countless families whose lives had been shattered by a harsh civil war. When terror was taking control, I can envision Churchill with his impressive physical presence motivating people to dream of a brighter future. Hmmm...perhaps they did learn to be charismatic. Who knows, maybe their focus on personal development, their capacity to understand people's needs, and their courage to act, as well as their emphasis on putting others first, were acquired rather than innate. I'm not sure if this is true for you, but I'm encouraged by the notion that we can learn to become positive, caring, and inspiring leaders.

Allow me to paraphrase Simon Sinek as we consider the type of leaders we aspire to be: “Leaders are the ones who run headfirst into the unknown. They rush toward danger. They put their own interests aside to protect us or to pull us into the future. Leaders would sooner sacrifice what is theirs to save what is ours. And they would never sacrifice what is ours to save what is theirs. This is what it means to be a leader. It means they choose to go first into danger, headfirst toward the unknown. And when we feel sure they will keep us safe, we will march behind them and work tirelessly to see their visions come to life and proudly call ourselves their followers.”

Author: Esteban Polidura, CFA. February 26, 2022.