It's Not About the Hat

Retiring is all about getting in touch with you. 

Long ago my sister and I had cow-kid outfits. Weren’t we cute? I think it was fitting that the picture was taken at my Grandfather’s farm.

In those days TV shows about cowboys were very popular. Do you remember John Wayne, Gary Cooper, Jimmy Stewart? Long before them, the craze ran toward cowboys who sang.

A whole bunkhouse of buckaroos would ride along together singing in lovely harmony. Or, we’d find a conveniently placed guitar just next to that tree. What a lovely ballad opportunity!

Different names like Tex Ritter, Roy Rogers, Gene Autry, and many more proved that you could be a man’s man, fight the bad guys, and still woo the damsel with song. Or if you were Dale Evans, you could be a woman’s woman.

I loved those guys. You too Dale.

In fact I was so enamored that when I grew up I thought being a singing cowboy would be just the best gig in the world. I wasn’t too hot on Mom’s idea about tap-dancing lessons, but when she proposed singing, I was in. So at age six I was sent along with most of the guys from my class to a new choir—my first. Mrs. Helen Smith, bless her, took the young boys of our small town under her wing and got us to sing. She couldn’t get a whole lot of enthusiasm out of most; football, basketball, and baseball were far more interesting. 

But in my case, the lessons took, and I’ve been singing ever since. These days I sing with a group that does gospel and old hymns in nursing homes three or more times per month.

The most delightful transition in this whole story was finding my cowboy hat. 

Ahh. Back in the saddle again.

The outfit wasn’t all that made the trip, however. These men made a real impression on me of what it meant to be a man. You could woo the girl. You could sing the song. You could ride and rope and wrangle.

But you could also save the day. Fight villainy. Chase bad guys. There was a difference between good behavior and bad and these men and women like always placed themselves on the side of good no matter the odds. They exemplified what it meant to stand up for those who could not stand for themselves. 

They had integrity. They did not take the easy way out. They did not accept bribes. They were decent, truthful, fair and exuded sincerity, truthfulness, and trustworthiness. 

Not too shabby! 

So when I don the cowboy hat I’m not just reaching for my gear. I’m putting on my armor against all the insincerity, lies, and distrust that are so easy to come by these days. These things are the modern bad guys.

When I get in touch with me, when I look back to my childhood and forward from there, I see how this interest in cowboys as heroes helped define who I am. When I look forward to tomorrow, I will always ask whether I’m still the person who deserves to wear the hat.

Ed Zinkiewicz

p.s. My videos in "Retirement Surprises Lesson 1" are all about crafting meaningful, engaging activities for your retirement. Part B might be of particular interest because it guides you through an exercise to find out what rests under your hat. Check out Retirement Kickstart. Try the introduction video; it's short and free!

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