It's Been Emotional
Ceri Mescall, CPP CAP APMP Fellow
Managing Director, Strategic Proposals Canada | Award-Winning Thought Leader | APMP Trainer
Hi, I’m Ceri Mescall. I’ve been a proposal professional for over 15 years. In the last two years, a great coach inspired me to tap into my full potential as a leader, and rediscover my love for proposals. My coach recommended checking out Brené Brown's work to help me develop my emotional intelligence.
Brené Brown is a Texan, research professor and author of Atlas of the Heart . The premise of Atlas of the Heart is that if we can better define our emotions - beyond “I’m happy”, “I’m sad” or “I’m angry”- we’ll make more meaningful connections.
Why should you care? Because, like the New Texas Giant , proposals can be a rollercoaster. While Brene’s book explores 87 emotions, I've chosen five to focus on - curiosity, pride, relief, freudenfreude, and belonging.
Curiosity
Brené defines curiosity as "recognizing a gap in our knowledge about something that interests us, and becoming emotionally and cognitively invested in closing that gap through exploration and learning."
What are some examples in proposals?
How about interviewing Subject Matter Experts – while you don’t have the answers (they do), you know exactly the right questions to ask (and exactly how to ask them) to translate the technical into client-focused, compelling copy.
Or, throughout the conference, you asked your peers how they manage similar challenges to you working within very different sectors (from Fed Gov to fintech), geographies (the US, Canada and beyond), and business types (from PLCs to small businesses to self-employed).
Pride
Brené?defines pride as "a feeling of pleasure or celebration related to our accomplishments or efforts".
Pride often gets a bad rap (e.g., "pride comes before a fall"). However, you need to celebrate the wins where you can.
What are some familiar examples?
How about you attend a debrief for that proposal that you gave everything to, and the client evaluator says, “your executive summary made me feel you were the only provider to truly understand our needs - you made it so easy to choose you”
Or, when Rick, Steven, Julia or Jay read out your name at APMP’s week of winners earlier this month. And yesterday you stepped onto the stage to receive your award in front of all your peers to the sound of their applause.?
Relief
Brené defines relief as "the feeling of tension leaving the body and being able to breathe more easily, thoughts of the worst being over and being safe for the moment, resting, and wanting to get on to something else".
What are some examples of relief in proposals?
How about when you hit the submit button for your proposal on that client portal that you had to upload all of your documents to individually while the countdown timer ticked down to the deadline, and the salesperson promised “one more change” to that pricing return?
Or maybe it’s when you force yourself to get up from your desk to go for a walk or to the gym or to yoga, and you feel all that tension in your brow and in your jaw and in your shoulders just melt away.
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Freudenfreude
This one was a new word for me to add to my vocabulary and I love it.
Freudenfreude is the opposite of schadenfreude. Brené defines it as "the enjoyment of another’s success".
So what are some examples in our world?
How about that time you celebrate a colleague’s winning proposal? The team I worked with did a lot of this virtually to keep up our morale during the pandemic.
Or, how about when your peer gets a well-deserved promotion?
Or, when you spent days coaching a team for oral presentations (including an attendee who was visibly nervous in the first rehearsal), and after they leave the client’s office they text you – “It went so well! There’s nothing we would change if we could do back and do it again!"
Belonging
Brené defines belonging as "a practice that requires us to be vulnerable, get uncomfortable, and learn how to be present with people without sacrificing who we are."
For me, belonging is one of the main reasons I’m an APMP member, and attend BPC.
What are some other examples?
How about that time you were asked to work on that proposal for a client in a sector that wasn’t really in your wheelhouse? So you connected with one of your colleagues and admitted, “I’m struggling”, and asked for their coaching, and they said, “I’ve got you”
Or, that time you introduced yourself to a team and one person kept pronouncing your name incorrectly. You were frustrated and the account manager you were working with corrected them on your behalf and asked them respectfully to get it right in future.
What now?
We all know proposals can involve pressure, personalities and politics. Emotions can run high.
Though the examples I provided were not exhaustive, I want you to feel empowered to:
Thank you for listening.
Proposals, Capture, and BD are how I roll!!!
2 年Hey Ceri -- I hope all is going well since the conference. I have started a new position and things are going swimmingly!
Organiser & problem solver that wants to do things right the first time ? Leads winning bids and proposals by removing chaos and delivering what clients ask for with innovation and integrity. Loves films.
2 年I love the ignite talks. I wish I had seen your live. Thanks for sharing it Ceri Mescall CPP CAP APMP Fellow
Ernst&Young | Assurance ... i may get lost, but not in the crowd.
2 年Ceri - sharing your writing with my kids ... thank you
RFP & Proposal Management Software ★ Customer Success ★ Value Consulting ★ Strategic Response Management ★ 2022 Chair, APMP HQ ★ 2021 CEO, APMP UK
2 年Thanks for sharing, Ceri!
Bid Director @ ISS Facility Services UK | APMP? Professional
2 年I've just saved this for later Ceri... when I have time to sit and read it with a cuppa :)