It's an Assistants thing. You wouldn't understand.

I've been writing my first book for the past few months. Poorly, admittedly. My role as EA to the largest owner/operator of residential-slash-commercial real estate in the city of San Francisco requires me to be "on" 24/7/365. And I do this willingly, not because my arm is being twisted behind my back. Finding focused time to devote to writing is a daily struggle. I wake up at 4:00 am every morning and it still feels like there isn't enough time in the day. But I make it happen.

I'm also a resident manager at one of the buildings in my company's portfolio which requires me to do daily, floor-by-floor inspections of the building, coordinate vendors for maintenance and be an ambassador for the company. This week I've twice had to fly out the door of my already insanely busy role supporting the CEO to handle a couple of emergencies at my building that required immediate attention. Frankly, I'm not exactly sure how we survived without the mobile devices we take for granted on a daily basis. I'm texting answers to questions, moving meetings, purchasing airline tickets and confirming interview requests with national media outlets during my UBER ride to my building to liaise with the plumber who's saving my company thousands of dollars in repairs by fixing a leaky pipe in a timely manner. So, what did YOU do today?

Beginning Saturday, April 22nd I will begin bringing MEGA Assistant University to several cities across the US, and my birthday vacation in Australia. My ultimate goal is to imbue my peers with the same spirit, energy, laser focus and efficiencies that have taken me to the top of the game. My story is a unique one, filled with strategy and opportunism, failures-turned-triumphs, and some clear paths around a lot of the bullshit and bullshit people who try and block our ascension. I've been thrown into some truly ridiculous situations that many would never believe to be true. (They're in the book.) Yet, through years of exposure, I've developed a resilience, persistence. and a bulletproof mindset allowing me to turn the bleakest situations into triumphs, consistently.

So, I've written a bunch of articles over the past 6 months that have pulled me into a spotlight of sorts. And, for that, I'm incredibly grateful. It has allowed me to share a bit about my story and give people a sense of who I am as an Assistant as well as a person. There's no subterfuge in play here. I'm about as WYSIWYG as they come. I'm proud of my 25 years in this game. I'm happy to be one of the new, clearer voices out there who is actually doing something to try and change the misperception of our role as Assistants and push companies to recognize and reward us commensurate with our contributions. I'm also calling bullshit on a lot of Assistants who have checked out and are simply collecting the check and dragging us backward with old-school antics like inappropriate "boobiage," homewrecking for sport, gossip cabals, mediocre work and poor attitudes, and incessant whining/complaining about not being respected while not being able to decode the simplest acronym in their company's marketing materials. We're all complicit to some degree which means we all need to begin calling it like we see it, setting a much higher performance bar, and holding one another accountable, mercilessly!

I was recently scouted to speak at a conference that, in all honesty, I shouldn't even be included in. The heavyweights that are scheduled to present are people I have looked up to for years. On paper, I should be intimidated. However, I've never been more excited. You see, I love a challenge. I love being thrown into a room with a bunch of "big whigs" and left to my own devices. It feels like sport to me. Sure, I may lack the polish or the Ivy League education. But, what I have in abundance is confidence, optimism, relatability and an insane breadth of life experience that no one in the room can rival. I've seen tragedies up close. I've lived through much of the crap they read about in their weekly, home-delivered journals. I've lived all over the world and performed for (and chilled with) the very dignitaries they admire. So, yeah, maybe I shouldn't be in the room per se. But the reality is, they often find me the most compelling person in the room and end up talking my ear off, fascinated by my story.

At this conference, I've chosen to take the gloves off and tell it like it is. I've attended many conferences that have been great networking opportunities and pretty informative, but none have really had the balls to tell the truth about what it takes to get to the top of this profession and the toll it can take on your life, health, and relationships. Those of you who know what I'm talking about, KNOW what I'm talking about. And it's time for someone to shine a light on some of the darkness people are afraid to unearth. It only makes us stronger and more aware, so it's worth the risk. I'm happy to report that this conference is taking a rather bold step by allowing me to present the not-so-pretty side of our profession and speak candidly about my hospitalizations for stress, my not-so-proud moments climbing the corporate ladder, defending my bosses in court, my called-off engagement with the love of my life because of lack of work/life balance, etc. I'm praying that they record it because it's truly TED-worthy. (I'll post info on the conference once it's officially announced.)

As I read back through many of the comments on the articles I've written, the number one theme continues to be, "Thank you for finally saying what I've been thinking for so many years." Which makes me think: What has happened to us, as a community of Assistants, that has caused us to lose our individual and collective voice? What have we allowed from the people and companies we support that has stripped us of our ability to simply speak up? And how do we turn this around as a movement when I'm sensing such systemic complacency across our global community of Assistants?

Trying to decipher this in one shot is like drinking from a fire hose. You WILL drown. So I've tried to craft a simpler approach with MEGA U. We start with the basics. We strip everything down to the most basic elements of our roles and assign new value to each component. We pile the residual emotions way over there somewhere and look at each, remaining Lego piece, strewn across the floor, as an opportunity to build something brand new and exponentially better! We begin viewing our execs as clients, whom we aim to impress and build a relationship based on service vs. servitude. We approach our day-to-day routines as if it's our very own corporation and build processes and efficiencies that perfectly service our client's needs as well as our own. We service and mine our networks to help us procure anything we need at any time. We search for opportunities (read: meaty projects) and ASK for the opportunity to take them on and do everything within our power to execute them flawlessly. And, once we build our brand with the people we support, we circle back for reciprocity. And, we confidently renegotiate our contracts. Or, just as confidently, terminate them and move on to those more than willing to take us on as a service provider on our terms.

We need our voices back. Simple as that. And we need to approach this role from a position of power instead of simply accepting it as what's written in the job description. Define your own role! You have that power. The job descriptions are written by people who often have no clue WTF it is we do on a daily basis, are completely unaware of the ninja shit that only Assistants know about, and are likely cutting-and-pasting from other JDs they find on other companies' job pages that "look kinda good." And we've allowed it. Real talk.

We've got to start over. Doesn't mean we toss all we've learned. Quite the contrary. What we need to do is unpack all that we've learned, remove the emotional baggage that has weighed us down for years, polish it up and repurpose it correctly as we redesign our approach and mindset to our roles. The abiilty is there. The resilience is there. It's exhibited daily in some form. It's just not being used in power. It's being used in defense. And the crazy part is it's an easy flip of the switch. EASY! But you need to know how to recognize it for what it is and make the conscious decision to actually do it.

So it's PSA time. You knew it was coming.

For those Assistants who have been in position for awhile and feel stuck, MEGA Assistant University is for you. For those Assistants who have lost their voice and need a Phoenix-style kick in the butt along with a game plan to turn it all around, MEGA Assistant University is for you. For those Assistants who are at the top of their game, but feel maxed and not sure what to do next, MEGA Assistant University is for you. For those Assistants who are new to the game and want to completely sidestep the bullshit and go directly to the top...hmmm. How do I say this? Uh, NO. Wrong attitude. You can never (effectively) rise to the very top of any game without putting in some miles and going through some shit. And even if you do manage to catch the express train, the shit will always catch up. For some of us, it has taken decades of bashing our heads against the wall, dealing with idiots and traversing corporate minefields in order to get to where we are today. HOWEVER, that's where MEGA Assistant University can help you. You will be in a room with some amazing professionals who have seen it, done it, and lived it all and will share their stories word-for-word. You'll be exposed to information, tips and tricks, and life lessons that will help you recognize calamities well before they happen and increase your intuition and effectiveness as you grow more experienced in position. So, yeah, you will have the ability to line jump years ahead of your peers at the same level. But, let's be clear. This is not a substitute for experience. As much as some of you would love to be handed the brass ring out the gate, in this role, it doesn't work like that. Get your ass to class like the rest of us and we'll all learn from each other and craft an action plan to get you where you want to go quickly, just not overnight. You've got to EARN that ring. Simple as that.

So, I'll wrap by saying this. This class (for now) will cost you $250. Sessions take place on a Saturday, because it's designed to be a "sacrifice" of sorts and not burden your company (and you) by being out of the office on a workday. It occurs in tiny groups of 15 - 20 people max because it's easier to ask questions, share stories, and actually learn something valuable in smaller groups. And, I believe the information and newfound energy you take away from a day at MEGA U is something you can apply immediately Monday morning and throughout the remainder of your career with tangible results. If you feel even the slightest hesitation about paying $250 of your hard-earned cash for a class that will help you level up quickly, put you in a room with some insanely talented EAs, and land you directly in my crosshairs for top jobs across the country that I'm constantly being asked to help fill, then PLEASE GO AWAY. Frankly, I don't want you in my class. Sorry, not sorry. This is an intensely focused session for those who know, without hesitation, that they want to get to the next level, and beyond! They want to join the movement of Assistants who are actually changing the game. They want exposure to those of us whom they already perceive as "killin' it" but are in the same class paying the same $250 trying to take their careers even further. THESE are the people I designed this class for and the ones whose butts will be in seats at "the table." Not the ones who will choose a month of Starbucks over their own career trajectories. #buh #bye

Upcoming Dates and Locations:

San Francisco: April 22

Boston: May 6

New York: May 13

Los Angeles: June 3

Seattle: June 10

Melbourne AUS: July 8

Sydney AUS: July 15 (my birthday!)

For more information or to apply for MEGA U, shoot me a direct message here on LinkedIn or click the APPLY button on my website phoenixnormand.com

Thank you for reading, liking, sharing, asking questions, challenging my stances, etc. We build community and add fire to the conversation by actually having the conversation. I love and appreciate all of you who sacrifice a bit of yourself each day in an effort to make the lives of those you support better. All I ask is that you ALWAYS do your very best and have the self-belief to not only know what's right and fair but to stand up and demand what's right and fair. It will serve you well. And it will allow the rest of us to continue marching forward, boldly while changing the world in ways only Assistants can.

Now, go sign up and get to class!