Issue 12 | Peeling the Layers & The 5 Masks

What does it really mean to be authentic?

A question I have been pondering for quite some time, and the basis of this newsletter.

There are those who say being authentic means to act naturally, to be aligned to your values, and to be honest and truthful to yourself and others. And I don’t want to invalidate this notion.?

AND when you start to uncover which parts of you are truly "natural," you may find that there are actually very few parts of you that are. For example, I have found that my being naturally inspires and uplifts those around me - it’s like an energy that wants to express itself through me.?

When I started to look and explore myself - peel back the layers so to speak - I discovered that:

• The part of me that is reliable and dependable forms part of an identity I created.?
• The part of me that goes quiet during conflict stems from trauma.?
• The part that feels unworthy at times is shaped by a story and/or past decision.?
• The part of me that quickly understands is there to help me feel in control.

Just to mention a few layers I discovered over the years. Many of you are probably familiar with the terms pattern, programme, ego, identity or story. I'm meeting more and more people who recognise that "this thing I always do ... that's not really me!"

My addictions, my bad habits, my child hood trauma, the identity I created over the years, my changing values even, my limiting beliefs and insecurities ... that's not authentically me, that's not who I truly am. It's just something I do or believe or have become accustomed to or adopted as a survival mechanism. There is a "true self" underneath it all.

And so, there are those who say that - so long as you are a human - it is impossible to become completely authentic. Because it's kind of a human thing to have an identity, and false beliefs, and habits and so on. Instead, they suggest that the best you can do is to become completely authentic about your inauthenticity. In other words, you become conscious to all the parts/patterns/stories of you that aren't truly you. Once you see them, you are able to own them or outgrow them in case they no longer serve you.?

If I’m not all of those things, then who am I??

When you explore this question, you will ‘inevitably’ (I think) come to the conclusion that who you are is both human and something beyond human - call it soul, spirit, consciousness, I AM, a multi-dimensional being …?

The I AM, our soul’s blueprint carries a unique vibration.?

I have connected to my own soul's vibration during meditation. In my experience, this vibration cannot be described through words. Who I AM is something I can feel, or recognise, or just know (beyond the mind).?It makes sense, no? The same way we can 'feel' what's true for us, and what resonates with us. We can feel, sense, know who we are beyond our fives senses.

Lately, I felt the urge to rename this newsletter. Instead of authentic living, I feel like it should be living in alignment or perhaps conscious living. But now I’m pondering what it means to be in alignment. ??

Alignment to what? To who I AM, to my purpose, my soul’s mission? How do I know when I’m in alignment and when I’m not? To be honest, I haven’t found words yet to articulate this. Perhaps it is something we all need to distinguish for ourselves in the experience.?

• Sometimes living in alignment means to sleep or take a rest in preparation of what’s yet to come.?
• Sometimes living in alignment feels like being in flow.?
• Sometimes it means to let go of resistance or expectations about what life should be.?
• Sometimes it means to listen to subtle signals and to take intuitive action.?

Living in Alignment or Conscious Living are all expressions that intend to get away from this notion of “finding our purpose or mission”, or something to get to, but rather, a way of living. An expression that is meant to bring us into the conscious experience of now.?

Now is all there is. We can only experience life in the now. The past and the future are just stories about the experience of life.

So maybe I'll rename for the next edition, you'll see! If you have a vote, drop a comment. ??

The Five Masks?

Quite often, we will find that we are not who we think we are. To illustrate this, let me introduce you to the characterology of the Five Masks, developed by psychotherapist William Reich and his student Alexander Lowen in the 1970s.??

“The characteristics of the 5 basic archetypal character structures are predictable outcomes based on Reich’s armouring theories, and tell us much about a person’s personal history which is written into the body.” (energeticsinstitute.com.au)

Reich’s theory described “life force” as an energy that flows through our body, but gets partially blocked by the development of “muscular armouring”.?This "armouring", by the way, can also be referred to as "survival mechanism".

“Armoring is the condition that results when energy is bound by muscular contraction and does not flow through the body.”?(energeticsinstitute.com.au)

These character masks or "defences" begin to develop as early as being in our mother’s womb to about the age of 6. Many of us wear multiple masks at the same time. Typically, we have 1 or 2 dominant ones.?

The Five Masks are:?

• The “Escape Artist” or “Unwanted Child” or Schizoid
• The “Needy Child” or Oral
• The “Controller” or Psychopath?
• The “Exhausted Giver” or Masochist?
• The “Rigid Perfect” or Perfectionist?

They offer a shockingly accurate description of our typical behaviours, relationship patterns, body shape, and areas where we hold tension. They can also reveal blocked energy around specific energy centres (chakras) and indicate our deep underlying wounds and desires.

For example, the “Needy Child” or Oral mask describes someone who tends to take up a lot space, the so-called “energy vampire”. They will try to draw attention to themselves, often creating drama in order to get what they need (which never seems to be enough). They may give, but they give in order to receive. One version of the Oral is to pretend not to have any needs, whilst at the same time, become resentful and bitter. As a child, they would have experienced some form of abandonment, of not having their needs met, or an emotional disconnect, especially from the mother. Orals often suffer from stomach issues and are prone to overeating in an attempt to “fill the hole”. Healing becomes possible for the “Needy Child” the moment they become present to the underlying “emptiness” and allow themselves to grieve on behalf of the child who didn’t have their needs met.?

Do you recognise this mask? Perhaps you have a "Needy Child" in your family or friends circle? ?? (hey, be compassionate!)

Remember, it is not about what our parents did or didn’t do but rather about our child self’s experience in the moment. As an adult, we may think, oh well, I got lost in the shopping centre for five minutes. No big deal. But for a 2-year old child, who doesn't have any concept of time yet, and who may have experienced a moment of panic and being left alone, it may well have been a “big deal”.?

It is not about shame, blame or guilt. The key here is to bring consciousness to the actual experience.?

Now, I’m conscious that this is a very brief introduction to the Five Masks. I cannot go into detail here in this newsletter. But I will leave a link in the resource section for you, if you’d like to read into them in your own time. You may recognise yourself in one or all of them and then might ask, what now?

I have spent the last six months discovering and recognising my own masks and have started detaching from them. So, I can tell you from my own experience, yes, it is possible to loosen the grip of these masks, to unfreeze its stuck energy from our BodyMind, and to outgrow our old ways of being. But it is not a quick process, it takes time and courage.?

For me, it was one of the most profound discoveries, a perfect example of “peeling a layer”, of recognising a way of being that doesn’t determine who I truly am.?

As always, if there is anything I have mentioned in today’s edition that you would like to discuss or know more about, send me a message or email and let’s connect.?

I love hearing from you!

Manuela

• Reich’s Characterology Types https://energeticsinstitute.com.au/characterology/
• Character structures: what are the 5 Reichian character defense patterns? https://bodymindassessment.com/blog/character-structures/
• I still have spaces over the next couple of months offering up to 3 free coaching sessions as part of my maturation coaching training. We could reveal your top masks and start to unfreeze some the stuck energy in your BodyMind. Get in touch if interested.