Isolation against our needs

I was in Italy during lock down of the whole country. I left Liguria via Bologna, flight to Poland was the only one among all the scheduled and cancelled flights. Terrifying view of the departures timetable: cancelled, cancelled, cancelled...

Kids are waiting at home to see me.

When prime minister of Italy proclaimed lock down, I was about to pack my stuff and go to France or Austria, untill I can, in the night. Well, fear is not a good advisor. Thanks Gods, I had reasonable person right by my side.

Today is my 9th day of quarantine. I started on monday, March 9th with whole Italy. I had only a short break in the plane, alone and far from anyone anyway.

While school is closed, my kids are with grandparents in a safe place. Safe for grandparents. I am alone at home.

Lucky me: I have a phone, computer, very good internet link, many people calling me, many people waiting for something for me. I am not alone. Contact with society is maintained. We are all lucky, we are living in XXI century, we have each other via internet.

And in whole this crazy coronasituation there is one question: if we have each other, we are ready for live online instead of real, when we can contact anyone anytime via net, what, the hell, is wrong?

Marshall Rosenberg, nonviolent communication founder, usually answers my questions very precisely.

>> Closeness. That's what is wrong.

Internet is a communication channel. Let's be gratful for having it. We can send the information, nad receive it. But exchange of informations will not replace the contact, and closeness is part of it. In privat relationships as well as in business.

Contact is an exchange, is a touch - handshake is a touch, did you mind?, is an inspiration, is a bond - worst or better, is being considered, being seen, is a feedback, and many other social needs that we don’t even know they exist and are present in our daily life.

>> Efficacy and power. That’s what is wrong.

We feel harmless in face of the virus, we cannot realize our plans, goals. We are forced to stack in one place, not to go anywhere, not to meet anybody. Yes, but we are not forced to think, learn, create, and sort things.

>> Choice and independence. That’s what is wrong.

Quarantine is a prison, separation, lockup. Yes it is. But it’s still our choice, if we go to quarantine or not. You can knock to the door of your neighbors. You can go to the shop, for a walk, to the library, whether it’s close or not. You can, but do you want? Who’s choice it is?

Marshall is talking about basic needs of all the people. Kid from Greenland or businessman from Hokkaido – it doesn’t matter who you are. You need all the things mentioned above.

Internet is our blessing in time of pandemic. Internet is not the solution for all our social needs.

What we can do that time for ourselves in time of separation?

:) Talk daily with someone you love.

:) Talk daily with someone who makes you think, and take your time to think about it.

:) Create. Learn something and create (song? origami? treehouse project?). No ideas? Reach your concepts from youth or childhood. Why not? 

:) Produce all the things – texts, projects, ideas - you usually have no time for.

:) Take care of your body. Touch is a very important need, although it’s a taboo. Take a hot or cold shower, make a massage of whole your body with a sponge. Make some exercices laying on the floor or leaning against the wall. Make a massage to your shoulders, legs, hands, feet, face, brush your hair.

:) Use your imagination: how do you want your life to look like after coronavirus and start preparing it.

Good luck. Good time. Stay healthy!

Na razie, até mais!