The Investment
By: Jordan Johnson
We are all familiar with the investment of money. You want to invest in something that is secure and grows. Now if you are more aggressive you may invest in something less secure with the opportunity for faster or larger growth.
What about investing in people and more importantly investing in ourselves. There are givers and takers in this world (well demonstrated in Adam Grant’s Give and Take). We have a major problem that has been compounded by social media but is fundamental in nature. It is the core component of the need for acceptance. This is not a bad thing but needs to be analyzed and moderated. Some people strive to become chameleons of society and simply want to fit in at any cost and any environment. Others just want to look the part. Social media has exacerbated this into an epidemic, where life is defined for many by the number of “likes”, “views”, “hits” and “follows”. For others it is the inability to give a black and white answer, and the always giving a “PC”/ neutral answer. This may be great at first but is not sustainable over time, it becomes mentally and physically exhausting and will actually strain the relationships that are worth the investment.
This is true in business and your personal life. The saying from when we were kids is still true: “you can’t please everyone”, yet we make so many bad investments in trying to do so. There has to be reciprocation in a relationship personal or business at some point. We live in a “cut throat” world where the push for “success” and money and closing the deal or “keeping up with the Jones” has become the driver. This is bad for the “givers” as your kindness will be mistaken for weakness. You will have the tendency to be taken advantage of in your personal and business life. You must identify this when it occurs and either continue or draw a boundary. Interestingly, when you choose to draw a boundary, the “taker” will generally try to play the victim. Strange how that occurs. You will often find out who is true and who is not. Many have a hidden agenda or motive that your boundary will expose.
For those that insist of “sucking the life” out of a relationship, riding on coattails, or getting mileage out of someone for gain---you need to limit and greatly moderate this. Why do I not say STOP it all together, because that is not going to happen and there are short bursts of time when this may be necessary. However, if you do it too long and too frequently, you will soon develop a reputation.
So, to decrease your stress and increase your longevity, make smarter investments with people, friends and business relationships.
Things to remember:
· You are not for everyone
· Don’t waste energy on meaningless friendships, relationships, forced interactions or unnecessary conversations
· You will say the wrong thing and irritate someone
· Life is short
· Some people and clients are seasonal, learn to let go and move on
· Ask yourself if the deck was stacked against me, who and how many would be there
· People are inherently selfish, they just are. It takes work to not be that way
· What goes around, comes around---We all must answer one day
· It is lonely at the top
· What will you be remembered for or by
Al Capone said- Don’t mistake my kindness for weakness. I am kind to everyone, but when someone is unkind to me, weak is not what you are going to remember.
Jordan Johnson