Introverts and Their Need for Space
Keith Engelhardt
I help Introverts EVOLVE ! ? to develop your highest potential and achieve the success you desire and deserve with Neuroscience based programs that produce long lasting results.
Space is important for introverts for various reasons, yet with only a few exceptions in the work place and in general, their need is overlooked and downright ignored. This has some major consequences for Introverts. And space is not just physical, it’s emotional, phycological, spiritual, mental, and energetic space. At least it is for me, and many Introverts I know.
Introverts are more dependent on acetylcholine pathways compared to dopamine pathways [1] [2] [3] . While dopamine provides excitement and rewards, acetylcholine provides introverts with calm and relaxation [1] [3] .?Acetylcholine?is also linked to pleasure, but in a different way than dopamine [1] .
So, this difference plays a major role in Introverts’ need for space. Yet, there are many common misconceptions about introverts and their relationship with space and need for space.
As an introvert,?I need plenty of quiet downtime. Especially if I spend too much time socializing—or am just “out and about” too much in noisy stores restaurants, etc.. — At minimum, I don’t feel like myself, and at the extreme, it can be downright exhausting.
Recent research shows that?extroverts get worn out by socializing , too. So it’s not just us introverts who need to rest?after chatting and meeting new people. Nevertheless, there are some real differences between introverts and extroverts. On average, introverts really do prefer solitude more than extroverts, and extroverts are more driven to engage in social interactions that elevate their social attention and status (more about this later).
So, scientifically speaking, why do introverts need more solitude than extroverts? As I mentioned, the answer is found in the wiring of our brains. One of the reasons introverts enjoy?alone time?has to do with how?introverts respond to rewards. Rewards are things like money, sex, social status, social affiliation, and even food.?
Of course, introverts care about things like earning money, eating, and having relationships, too. But?researchers ?hypothesize that introverts respond differently than extroverts to rewards. When compared to extroverts, introverts are less engaged, motivated, and energized by the possibilities for rewards around them. So, they talk less, are less driven, and experience less enthusiasm. In fact, they may find levels of stimulation that are rewarding and energizing for extroverts to be tiring or annoying; especially if we don’t have our space and alone time.
As an introvert, it can be hard to get enough alone time. You?may feel guilty when you decline a social invitation or tell your significant?other you want a night to yourself. However, not getting enough alone time can affect you physically and emotionally.?According to Dr. Marti Olsen Laney in her book?The Introvert Advantage: How Quiet People Can Thrive in an Extrovert World ,?you may not be getting enough alone time if you regularly experience some of these symptoms:
And according to a May 6, 2022?article by?Barrie Davenport there are “11 Not-So-Nice Things That Happen When Introverts Don’t Get Alone Time ”
What Happens When Introverts Don’t Get Alone Time ? Well the article says they can experience:
A quick search for information regarding Introverts needing for space and recharge time yielded books and journal articles:
1.???? Cain, S. (2012). Quiet: The power of introverts in a world that can't stop talking. Broadway Books. In this book, the author argues that introverts need space and solitude to recharge and stay mentally healthy.
2.???? Zelenski, J. M., Santoro, M. S., & Whelan, D. C. (2012). Would introverts be better off if they acted more like extraverts? Exploring emotional and?cognitive consequences?of counter-dispositional behavior.?Emotion, 12(2), 290-303. This study found that introverts who acted more like extraverts experienced negative emotional and?cognitive outcomes, suggesting that introverts need to be true to their own nature to thrive.
3.???? Demir, M., & ?zdemir, M. (2010).?Friendship?and loneliness among Turkish?late adolescents: The roles of?social personality traits. Journal of?Social Psychology, 150(6), 681-699. This study found that?introverted adolescents?were more likely to feel lonely than their extraverted peers, suggesting that they need more space and solitude to feel comfortable.
4.???? Laney, M. O. (2002). The?Introvert Advantage: How Quiet People Can Thrive in an Extrovert World.?Workman Publishing. This book argues that introverts need space and solitude to recharge and stay mentally healthy, and provides practical strategies for introverts to thrive in an?extroverted world.
5.???? Costa, P. T., & McCrae, R. R. (1992).?Revised NEO Personality?Inventory (NEO-PI-R) and NEO Five-Factor Inventory (NEO-FFI)?professional manual.?Psychological Assessment?Resources, Inc. This study found that introverts scored higher on the?personality trait?of "need for privacy," suggesting that they need more space and solitude than extraverts.
6.???? Cain, S., & Grant, A. M. (2010). Quiet leadership: Six steps to transforming performance at work. Penguin. In this book, the authors argue that?introverted leaders?can be highly effective, but need space and solitude to recharge and stay mentally healthy.
7.???? Demir, M., & Weitekamp, L. A. (2007). I am so happy ‘cause today I found my friend: Friendship and personality as predictors of happiness.?Journal of Happiness Studies, 8(2), 181-211. This study found that introverts were less likely to report having?close friends?than extraverts, suggesting that they may need more space and solitude to feel comfortable.
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8.???? Zelenski, J. M., & Whelan, D. C. (2011). On the?psychological benefits?of?nature exposure. Psychological Science, 22(6), 733-738. This study found that introverts experienced greater psychological benefits from spending time in nature than extraverts, suggesting that they may need more space and solitude in natural environments.
9.???? Cain, S. (2016). Quiet power: The secret strengths of?introverted kids. Dial Books. In this book, the author argues that?introverted children?need space and solitude to recharge and stay mentally healthy, and provides practical strategies for parents and educators to support introverted children.
10. Diener, E., & Seligman, M. E. (2002). Very happy people. Psychological Science, 13(1), 81-84. This study found that introverts were just as likely to report high levels of happiness as extraverts, suggesting that introverts may need more space and solitude to feel content and fulfilled.
And Cain in her book “Quiet: The power of introverts in a world that can't stop talking.” shares
“…the amount of space allotted to each employee has shrunk 60% since the 1970s; and that open office plans are associated with reduced concentration and productivity, impaired memory, higher turnover and increased illness.[11] ?Cain says that the more creative people tend to be "socially poised introverts",[13] ?solitude is a crucial and underrated ingredient for creativity,[20] ?and office designs and work plans should allow people to be alone as well as to socialize.[23] I have had many experiences over the years in workplaces that the lack of space and quiet were seeds for exhaustion, productivity and creativity loss and much more.
What are some common misconceptions about introverts and their relationship with space?
Here are some common misconceptions about introverts and their relationship with space:
1.?Introverts don't like people: This is not necessarily true. Introverts can enjoy socializing, but they may prefer it in smaller groups or with people they know well. They may also need more alone time to recharge their energy.
2.?Introverts are shy: While some introverts may be shy, not all introverts are.?Shyness?is a separate?personality trait?from introversion, and introverts may be confident and assertive in certain situations.
3.?Introverts always want to be alone: While introverts may need more alone time than extroverts, they can still enjoy spending time with others. They may just prefer more meaningful or?intimate interactions?rather than?large social gatherings.
4.?Introverts are antisocial: This is not true. Introverts can have fulfilling?social lives, but they may prioritize quality over quantity when it comes to?social interactions.
5.?Introverts don't like to have fun: Introverts can enjoy fun activities just like anyone else. They may just prefer activities that are more low-key or involve fewer people.
In terms of their relationship with space, other misconceptions include:
6.?Introverts always want to be in a quiet space: While some introverts may prefer quiet spaces, others may enjoy?background noise?or music. It depends on the individual and their preferences.
7.?Introverts don't need a lot of space: While introverts may not require as much physical space as extroverts, they may still value having their own?personal space?or a designated area to retreat to.
So, it's important to recognize that introverts and extroverts have different?personality traits?and preferences, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach to understanding or interacting with them.
Here are some ways to create a space that is conducive to balance:
1.?Declutter: A cluttered space can be distracting and stressful. Removing unnecessary items and organizing your space can create a more peaceful and focused environment.
2.?Natural light: Natural light has been shown to improve mood and increase?energy levels. If possible, position your workspace or living area near a window or invest in natural light lamps.
3.?Plants: Incorporating plants into your space can improve air quality and reduce?stress levels. They can also add a natural and calming aesthetic to your environment.
4.?Comfortable seating: A?comfortable chair?or seating area can encourage relaxation and make it easier to focus on tasks or personal reflection.
5.?Personalization: Adding personal touches to your space such as photos, artwork, or?meaningful objects?can create a sense of belonging and inspire creativity.
6.?Quiet space: Creating a?quiet space?for reading, meditation, or reflection can provide a sense of peace and help you disconnect from distractions.
7. Inspirational materials: Surrounding yourself with?inspirational books, quotes, or visuals can help motivate and inspire personal growth.
Remember, personal growth is a unique journey and everyone's needs and preferences may differ. Experiment with different elements in your space to find what works best for you.
So fellow Introverts, what are some of the ways you have or currently use to achieve balance as an Introvert related to space and quiet time?
Share in the comments.
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