Introducing Grief Days to Employee Welfare Packages: A Compassionate Approach

Grief is a deeply personal and unpredictable journey. It ebbs and flows, often catching us off guard when we least expect it. This week marked the fourth anniversary since my mum passed away from cancer, and despite handling the day last year, this time was different.

I woke up with a knot in my stomach, overwhelmed by a wave of sadness I couldn’t quite explain. Fortunately, as someone who works for myself, I was able to take the afternoon off, head to the beach with a book, and give myself the space to feel my grief—a luxury not afforded to many in the corporate world.

Reflecting on my past experience in the corporate world, when my father died 20 years ago (cancer again ??) I was granted only five days off to process my grief, bury him, and then was expected to return to work as if everything was back to normal.

There were no allowances for the long-term impact of such a profound loss. This stark contrast highlighted the privilege I now have to control my own schedule and honour my emotions when they arise.

It made me realise how desperately companies need to rethink their approach to supporting employees through grief.

The Case for Grief Days

Grief doesn’t adhere to a timeline. It doesn’t come neatly packaged in five-day blocks that can be ticked off like vacation time. Grief is messy, unpredictable, and can resurface years later on anniversaries, birthdays, or even random moments that trigger a memory. The idea of "moving on" within a set timeframe is a myth, yet many companies still operate with policies that suggest grief can be managed like a simple task on a to-do list.

Research shows that 85% of people believe companies should offer more flexible time off for grieving employees, beyond just the immediate days following a loss (Grief Recovery Institute, 2020). However, only a small percentage of companies actually have policies in place that extend beyond the traditional bereavement leave of a few days.

Grief days, a concept relatively new to the corporate landscape, would allow employees to take time off specifically to deal with grief, whether it’s the anniversary of a loved one’s passing, a sudden wave of emotion, or a personal need to reconnect with memories. This isn't just about providing time—it's about recognising that grief is a lifelong process that can impact an employee’s mental, emotional, and physical health.

Why Grief Days Matter

The stigma around grief in the workplace often forces employees to hide their emotions, pushing through pain in a bid to remain “professional.”

In the UK, grief in the workplace has significant financial implications, costing the economy around ￡23 billion annually. This figure includes the impact on reduced tax revenue, increased use of NHS and social care services, and decreased productivity due to absenteeism and presenteeism. Furthermore, about 7.9 million working-age people in the UK experienced a bereavement in the past year, highlighting the widespread nature of grief among employees(Sue Ryder Main Website ).

Many employees do not feel adequately supported by their employers during these difficult times. Nearly 24% of bereaved employees felt they did not receive the right level of support, and 22% reported not being granted sufficient time off to grieve.

The absence of formal support structures has led to a call for official bereavement policies, with 74% of Brits believing that there should be one in place for all workers(HRreview ).

Grief days acknowledge that employees are human and that their well-being extends beyond the office. Allowing grief days—or at least providing the flexibility to navigate these difficult times—sends a powerful message that the company values its employees not just as workers, but as people with real, complex lives outside of the office.

Flexibility and Sensitivity Around Grief Anniversaries

For companies that feel unable to implement formal grief days, offering flexibility and sensitivity around anniversaries of losses can be a compassionate alternative. Grief anniversaries can hit just as hard as the initial loss, sometimes even more so, as the passage of time doesn’t necessarily lessen the pain. It’s not uncommon for grief to be reactivated by milestones, reminding individuals of what has been lost.

Companies can support employees by creating a culture of understanding and openness around these dates. Managers can offer flexible scheduling, remote work options, or simply a day off without questioning the need. This requires a shift in corporate culture, moving away from the taboo of discussing grief to an environment where it’s okay to not be okay.

Grief Isn’t Linear—There’s No Prescribed Timeframe

One of the greatest misconceptions about grief is that it follows a linear path, neatly progressing from one stage to the next until it’s over. However, grief doesn’t work this way. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s famous five stages of grief—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—were never meant to be a roadmap that everyone follows. Grief is cyclical, non-linear, and unique to each individual. You can feel “fine” one day and utterly devastated the next.

“Grief is not something you get over; it’s something you go through,” says Dr. Alan Wolfelt, a renowned grief counsellor and author. “It changes you, and the goal isn’t to ‘move on’ but to find ways to live with the loss.”

This perspective challenges the corporate mindset that grief should be quickly resolved. Companies need to move beyond the belief that once the immediate shock of loss is over, employees should be back to their usual selves. Recognising that everyone’s grief journey is different—and that it doesn’t have an expiration date—is crucial in creating compassionate workplace policies.

Breaking the Taboo: Bringing Grief into the Conversation

One of the biggest hurdles to implementing grief days or more flexible policies is the pervasive taboo surrounding grief in society. We’re often taught to keep our grief private, to “be strong” and “carry on.” In the workplace, this translates to a reluctance to discuss personal loss for fear of seeming weak or unprofessional. This silence only adds to the isolation many feel when grieving.

By normalising conversations around grief, companies can foster a more supportive environment. This can be as simple as training managers to recognise signs of grief, encouraging employees to share their experiences if they feel comfortable, and implementing Employee Assistance Programs (EAPs) that offer counselling and support. Creating a culture where it’s okay to say, “I’m having a tough day,” without fear of judgment or repercussion can make all the difference.

Moving Forward: A Call to Action for Companies

While grief is universal, the way it’s handled in the workplace is often inadequate and outdated. By introducing grief days, providing flexibility, or simply showing empathy around significant dates, companies can play a pivotal role in supporting their employees’ mental health and well-being.

Not every company can implement grief days immediately, but every company can start by listening, understanding, and creating space for grief. It’s time to bring this conversation out of the shadows and into the workplace, where it can make a profound difference in the lives of employees.

Grief isn’t a burden to be managed; it’s a part of being human. By honouring that, companies can build a more compassionate, connected, and resilient workforce—one that understands that life, in all its messy, beautiful complexity, continues even after loss.