An interview well spent...

"You are into sales, ok sell me this pen" he said holding a striped Natraj pen in his hand above his desk.

"Sir, I am into software sales, that too portal sales. I dont have any experience of selling a Re 5 thing"

"A Salesman must be able to sell anything that comes his way. Come on give it a try! Btw, call me Naren." Somehow I did make a sales pitch.

"I need atleast ten thousands of these every month. Now what is your offer?" . This drove me irritated but nevermind, he's the BSO of a large sized company I would love to work with, possibly reporting to him.

"Naren, right?" a gesture confirming the name. "Naren, I could have asked for Re 6 per piece and then offered you a 20% discount to earn a better revenue. But I wont play that trick with someone who are highly professional."

"Make a better pitch !"

"I am from a land of Gandhi and dont brag about my product as Gandhi taught me to be humble and down to earth. My manufacturing cost of this product is Rs 4.35 per piece. A monthly profit of Rs 6500 doesnt even pay a half a day worth of my salary which have not even been considered."

A small pause (interviewer confused) I continued "If you still insist and plan to place a contract for atleast 22 months and 10000 pieces per month, I can offer one month or 10000 pieces free after the 11th & 23rd month. I am sure this is an offer you wont be able to refuse."

"Ah! That DishTv strategy. It always works with me as well."

"So what do you think? I am able to convince you buy the pen? Is the offer something you think you cant refuse?"

"But you didnt tell me any features. Why should I buy it?"

"Sir, we are having a meeting to discuss this, I am sure you must have checked out the pen and had a look at the brochure. I can always suggest you, its India's highest selling pen, free flowing ink, and soft grip to ensure fast note taking while being in a meeting. that is one neglected pain points in an organization like yours."

"Well, you have made up your pitch. Lets meet in the next round after sometime."

After 10 minutes of waiting at the reception, another call for round 2

"Now tell me, what targets can you achieve in our organization?"

"I need to know how does your org works. My last company I would easily touch up anything between usd 30k and have gone till usd 70k of new business. And that required me to work smartly hard over upwork and direct leads."

"Talk about the present, if I hire you, how much business can you promise?"

"I am not sure of the numbers here as I lack the info about process followed, support of team mates & tech teams and also the kind of projects you cater to. Would be happy to adjust here for a few months and then start upon my targets. Maybe from the fourth/fifth month I can have a target of 8k usd, increasing every second month."

"But you achieved 30k in the last company, why start from 0 and 8k? I ensure you a situation of great support from all corners."

"Let's start with a 20k from second month then, every lagging support elements deducts a 10k of target."

"Are you offering me a target or negotiating with me? If later is the case, you are wrongly negotiating it."

"Naren, I hold a certificate of specialization in negotiations and portal sales. We are both into negotiating mode. Let's get into a real thing. We both are both trying to sell ourself. You have a brand name and I have my CV."

"Arent you too sharp to respond here? I reject such discussions usually."

"I apologize for sounding loud to you, my intentions are communicating my real self and how I make my sales pitches & client handling. I wont deny, but the one you talked to is the real me. Not this short tie guy, I am more of informal jeans tshirt one, except for client meetings. I usually do keep a shirt handy in office incase a video call pops up."

Nekait, what about the package you are expecting? Based on the interview, I can offer you a 20% hike to your current ctc. Here is what I have to offer." handing me a piece of print out with several elements of a salary package, something pretty complex.

"Frankly speaking I was expecting something similar, Naren. However, I am unsure of my inhand salary, my incentive & its calculation."

"Here is what you receive at the end of the month as a fixed element, 20% of the package would be how much you book new business at the end of each quarter based on the targets."

"Thats something new to me. Eventually, I get no hike on the fixed salary? I am unsure of this one. Basic, allowances, taxes, gratuity. The incentive one can be the deal breaker here Naren. I need time to be considered in other agencies I have applied to and then see how does this offer stand. I will wait for your offer in written."

"Oh! you are pretty frank in discussing your displeasure here. Why do you need an offer then?"

"Just to make sure that what we have discussed is documented well. This is one bad habit of mine I dont want to work on. If I receive your offer well documented, I will have a better insight of the same and also have better idea of my candidature for this opportunity."

A week later, unexpectedly I received their offer of 30% hike (20% incentives), but I had accepted another offer by then. Names hidden or changed to hide the identities, a real-life non-constructive interview where a software sales head thinks selling a pen is equivalent to selling software services.

I am still unsure if I should have accepted their offer and reporting to this guy.