Interview with Daria Sivovol, CEO of American Chamber of Commerce Estonia

"Inside Out" is an interview series exploring individuals' journeys. Our focus is on the inner challenges, victories, and growth that led to their success, with an occasional discussion of how it applies to their professional lives. We believe that true success stems from inner development and aim to inspire others to follow their callings. Our guests help connect the dots between internal growth and external achievement by sharing their stories. This initiative is part of Spirit X.

Please meet Daria!

## Could you tell your story?

First, imagine you have amnesia and have forgotten all aspects of your life. To remember who you are and the type of person you've become, please reflect on key moments, realizations, and milestones that have shaped your evolution from the earliest memories you can recall until the present day.

I'll start from the beginning. Growing up, I was surrounded by certain expectations and societal pressures. I was born into a family where every member had attended, graduated from, and worked at the National Aerospace University. It seemed predetermined that I would follow this path, focusing on subjects like mathematics and physics in school. However, I always felt slightly different, especially during the tumultuous times of the 1980s and the collapse of the Soviet Union. This period sparked in me a desire to explore beyond my known world, particularly the United States.

In 1991, the U.S. Department of State launched the FLEX scholarship program, originally called the Freedom Support Act. This program offered a one-year exchange for students to live with a host family in the U.S. I secretly applied, not even telling my parents, driven by an inexplicable urge to go abroad. After progressing through various stages of the competition, I reached the final interview. They asked about my parents' thoughts on the program, assuming their support since I was only 15. I assured them of my parents' approval and was eventually accepted into the program.

When I broke the news to my parents, they were initially opposed, citing concerns about my inexperience with travel and the unknowns of living in the U.S. I remember telling my mother that I couldn't bear the thought of living with regret, wondering how my life might have differed had I taken the chance. Eventually, they relented, and that decision became a turning point in my life.

I spent a transformative year in Spokane, Washington, attending an American high school and living with a host family. This experience in 1994, during an era of technological advancement and cultural differences compared to my home country, profoundly changed me. I returned home with a new perspective and aspirations, deciding not to pursue the path laid out for me in Ukraine.

Instead, I enrolled in the same university as you (Kharkiv National University of Economics), studying international economic relations. My interest in economics and marketing, which I discovered during my time in the U.S., led me down this new path, despite my father's initial skepticism.

During university, I participated in a character development and sailing camp in North Carolina for five summers. This experience, which emphasized sports as a means of character building, profoundly influenced me. The camp's principles, like 'integrity is doing the right thing when nobody's watching' and 'if you stop getting better, you stop being good,' deeply influenced me. After graduating, I worked there full-time as a camp director for three years.

Eventually, I married a fellow university alumnus. When he received a job transfer to Tallinn, we decided to move there for what we thought would be a year or two. Nineteen years later, we are still here, having fallen in love with Estonia, despite missing certain energies from the United States.

Now, I work with the chamber to inspire positive change, aiming to improve the business and living environment in Estonia, ensuring it remains attractive for investors and companies. This role allows me to live out my aspirations and continue inspiring change.

## What drives you?

I am driven by the sense of progress and positive change. Meeting interesting people and engaging in energetic exchanges truly energizes me. I consider myself a person attuned to energy - I draw it from the atmosphere, from people, and from intriguing ideas. The feeling that I, personally, have made a difference is what motivates me the most. On the other hand, if I sense that my actions are having no impact, that I'm merely existing without contributing, then that's a disheartening day for me.

## What is behind this??

My Estonian neighbors often joke, asking if I'm on drugs, because I'm always smiling, happy, and greeting everyone warmly. While it's amusing, it also raises an interesting point that might intrigue a psychologist. Perhaps there's an event from my childhood that sparked this disposition. I'm not sure what it could be, but this cheerful nature has been a part of me for the last 20 years, without a doubt.

## What is more important, the result or the process?

For me, the process is as important as the outcome. I believe it's crucial to enjoy the journey, as life itself is a journey. I don't want to endure suffering through the process just to achieve a result. While some people prioritize the end result and are indifferent to the means of achieving it, that approach doesn't work for me. I need to find joy in the process because that aligns with who I am. However, a pleasant process without any tangible results isn't satisfactory either. I consider myself result-oriented and need to feel that I've accomplished specific goals I've set for myself. If I don't fully achieve a goal, I try to mentally break it down into smaller objectives. This way, I can appreciate the smaller achievements that contribute to the larger goal. Both the process and the outcome are important to me.

## What do you do when you achieve the goal??

This mindset is actually what led to the development of many new programs here at the Chambers. There's a common saying, 'don't fix it if it ain't broken,' implying that one shouldn't change something that's already working well. However, I find myself getting bored when there's a lack of novelty or challenge. So, despite it sometimes resulting in extra work or additional challenges, I believe it's these very elements that make the process fun and interesting. Seeking out new challenges and innovations keeps things dynamic and engaging for me.

## What would it mean for you if you lost your current work activities? What will you do??

If I were to lose my current job, I think I would start my own venture in the same field where I excel: being a connector. Facilitating connections and bringing people together is not just my talent; it's my strength. I envision creating a company or a club dedicated to this purpose. In this new venture, I would continue to connect people, offering them valuable insights and information. For instance, I could organize events featuring expert speakers from leading companies like Oracle or Microsoft. When these experts share knowledge that is new and thought-provoking, it has a significant impact. I feel a deep sense of fulfillment when attendees walk out of our events with fresh perspectives, thanking us for the insights that sparked new thoughts and realizations. It’s incredibly rewarding to know that I've played a role in channeling that new emotion or information to others.

## It is tough to measure your impact because it is not tangible at first look.?

The value we offer at the chamber isn't tangible, yet it's immensely impactful. This is evident in the loyalty of our members; many have stayed with us for over 20 years. When I inquire about their longstanding membership, they often express that joining was one of the best decisions for themselves and their companies. They feel consistently connected, like they're always in the loop and well-informed. It's a 'one-stop shop' that offers them real value. To me, this is the ultimate measure of our success. If we weren't fulfilling our purpose effectively, these members would likely have left. Their continued presence and satisfaction are a testament to the work we do.

## Are you a proactive or reactive person??

Absolutely, I strive to be proactive, but I also recognize the importance of being reactive in certain situations. While my goal is to anticipate and act in advance, it's not always possible to be perfectly proactive. Sometimes, especially in areas where I lack experience, I might miss the early signs and find myself needing to react to situations rather than preventing or predicting them. However, each experience is a learning opportunity. With time and gained knowledge, I become more proactive in similar situations in the future.

## When making decisions, do you incorporate analytics or intuition??

I would say my approach involves both intuition and analytics, but it leans more towards intuition. Often, I have a gut feeling about certain matters. However, to present these ideas effectively to my board and members, I need to back them up with solid analytical reasoning. It's not feasible to rely solely on my intuition in these cases. So, typically, I start with an intuitive idea and then build an analytical foundation to support it. This approach is essential to convincingly communicate the value of my ideas.

## How do you feel about people in general??

I'm truly a people lover; I never tire of interacting with others. In fact, I often find immense joy in engaging with the most introverted individuals, many of whom I encounter here in Estonia. It's almost like a fun challenge for me to see if I can 'crack' their reserved exterior. Whether it's through small talk, an insightful question, or a well-timed joke, I enjoy gradually opening up a channel of communication. There's a particular thrill in sensing that initial 'little door' of interaction opening up, and the moment I feel like I've made a genuine connection, it's incredibly rewarding.

## How do you react to pleasant and unpleasant situations??

Of course, pleasant situations are always welcome. However, dealing with unpleasant situations used to be a challenge for me. As someone sensitive to energy, both positive and negative emotions impact me deeply. I would become particularly upset when things didn't go as planned, or if someone disappointed me unexpectedly. But my father taught me a valuable lesson that has helped me manage these feelings. He advised me to mentally 'allocate' things and people to different 'shelves' or 'boxes.' By doing so, I set realistic expectations for each situation and person. This approach prevents shock or excessive disappointment because I'm prepared for what to expect from each 'shelf.' It's a more philosophical way of looking at things, understanding that not everyone and everything belongs on the 'top shelf,' and that's perfectly okay.

## What if people appear in the end on completely different shelves??

As an optimist, my natural inclination is to place everyone and everything on the top shelf initially, giving them the benefit of the doubt. If they prove otherwise, I adjust my perception and mentally move them to a different 'shelf.' This change isn't fixed, though. If they later surprise me with something positive, I'm more than willing to reassess and move them back up. This demonstrates my flexibility in adjusting my views based on new information or actions. It's a dynamic process of constantly reevaluating people and projects, always open to the possibility that they might exceed my initial expectations.

## Are you satisfied with what you have today??

Yes, I consider myself to be quite balanced, which is important to me. Work is a significant part of my life; it drives, stimulates, and inspires me. However, I also place great value on my roles as a mother, wife, and daughter. I make a conscious effort to be equally engaged in all these areas, aiming to excel in each one. This balance is crucial for my overall sense of fulfillment and well-being.

## Do you do charity work?

It's fascinating to work on various charity projects through AmCham, which we make public. This transparency is vital as we raise funds from our members and partners, and they deserve to know how their contributions are utilized. On a personal level, I'm also actively involved in support projects, though I don't necessarily label them as 'charity.' For example, one of our significant efforts has been supporting Ukrainian refugees. Utilizing our connections in the U.S., my husband and I have managed to supply three SUVs from the United States to western Ukraine. These vehicles undergo military upgrades to aid in the conflict. While we're not directly involved in the combat, we feel that this contribution is our way of being a part of the support chain. Additionally, I focus on helping children locally, finding ways to provide clothing and other necessities, recognizing the challenges they face.

## Do you regret anything from your past??

I try not to dwell too much on the past because it's like sitting in a rocking chair—there's a lot of movement, but no forward progress. Constantly pondering 'what if' scenarios keeps you stuck in one place. Although I've occasionally wondered about the paths not taken, especially when recalling opportunities I passed up due to personal reasons or a lack of confidence. Looking back, I realize I had the capability to seize those chances, but at the time, I didn't recognize my own potential. Sometimes, I think I should have just said 'yes' or taken a leap of faith. However, apart from these reflections, I don't harbor any significant regrets.

##? What makes you happy??

What truly makes me happy, as I mentioned earlier, is achieving balance in life. This balance encompasses my family, including my children who are both successful and motivated, as well as my career, which I am passionate about. It's crucial for me to have a job that I love, not one that I endure solely for financial reasons. The fulfillment I derive from having all these essential elements of my life – the ones I dreamed of as a child – in harmony, is what brings me true happiness.

## Do you eat a lot, and do you sleep a lot??

I'm mindful about my food intake and actually wish I could manage to eat even less. Currently, I'm experimenting with intermittent fasting, specifically by skipping breakfast. I've noticed that eating can sometimes make me feel overly relaxed, almost as if it diverts blood flow from my brain to my stomach, which can be a bit draining. On another note, I do wish I could get more sleep. On average, I sleep around six to seven hours a night, but I often feel that a bit more sleep would be beneficial for complete restoration.

## How do you recharge your batteries??

Travel is a major source of rejuvenation for me. Whenever I have the opportunity to visit a new place, I return feeling fully recharged, as if I've been plugged in and my battery is fully restored, much like recharging a phone. This energy boost can last me for several months before I feel the need to travel again. And it's not just about beach vacations; any form of travel that offers a different perspective or environment is refreshing. For instance, earlier this year, I fulfilled a long-standing dream of visiting Tokyo, Japan. That trip left an indelible impression on me, recharging me to what felt like 150% of my capacity.

In addition to travel, attending trainings and conferences with my colleagues from across Europe is immensely energizing. These experiences are not just about relaxation but also about learning and growing professionally. Hearing about their work inspires me to try new things and ask myself, 'Why haven't I been doing this?' These interactions are incredibly stimulating and play a crucial role in recharging my mind.

## Do you practice some activities to train your self-discipline?

I have a long-standing passion for sports, especially running. I've completed at least 14 half marathons, though I've yet to run a full marathon. I came close in 2020 when I trained for the Paris Marathon, scheduled for early April. By March, I was fully prepared, having completed my longest training run of 34 kilometers. However, the marathon was canceled due to the Covid situation, which was a huge disappointment.

Since then, I've reverted to focusing on half marathons. Additionally, I've explored yoga and found it quite enjoyable. I plan to integrate yoga more into my routine during the winter months. Running in the cold climate here can be quite unpleasant, and treadmill running in the gym just isn't the same. So, for me, my sporting activities are somewhat seasonal, with a shift towards more spiritual and indoor practices like yoga during the colder months.

## How do you understand the term “call of the soul”?

I believe that we enter this life with a purpose to evolve and reach a higher level of development than where we started. To me, the soul's primary goal is growth — spiritual, mental, and experiential. This growth is fundamental because, without it, life can feel somewhat unfulfilled. Simply existing without progress or advancement feels like a missed opportunity. In essence, life is about moving forward, continually evolving and enriching our experiences.

## How will you help your kids to find the call of the soul for them?

For us, parenting has always been about leading by example rather than just through words. We believe it's crucial for our children to learn by observing how we achieve our own goals. For instance, to instill the value of physical fitness, they see us actively engaged in sports. This has influenced them as well; both are competitive tennis players and have never shown an inclination to quit, likely because they've never seen us give up on our pursuits.

We also emphasize the importance of continual learning. Our habits of reading, traveling, and exploring museums are shared experiences that inspire their own love for learning. We don't just tell them to study; we show them the joy of acquiring knowledge.

Our social interactions also serve as a model. We love hosting gatherings and believe in the joy of sharing and celebrating with others. This has been reflected in our children's behavior with their friends—they enjoy being hospitable and giving.

In essence, we see children as mirrors of their parents. They are more likely to emulate what they observe than what they are simply told. This is my current philosophy. Ask me in 10 years, and I’ll be able to share whether this approach has been effective.

As for their future, we don't dictate specific professions for them but rather encourage them to set and pursue high goals. We emphasize the importance of aiming high and thinking big. While we don't expect perfection or fear failure, we do expect them to strive for more than just 'good enough.

## Can you name several inner wins that you're proud of internally?

I take great pride in the courage I displayed at 15, deciding to travel abroad despite reservations from my parents and my own subconscious fears. It was a significant leap into the unknown, as I had never traveled before and had concerns about the family I would stay with and potential dangers. However, choosing to not dwell on these fears and going ahead with the trip was a major inner victory for me, boosting my confidence and strengthening my soul.

Another significant win was the decision to immigrate. As you know, moving to a new country is a monumental challenge. It transforms your entire life, including your social circle, environment, language, and cultural surroundings. The courage to embrace this change and adapt to a new setting was a substantial achievement.

Lastly, I am proud of my commitment to long-distance running. It's not just about physical endurance; it involves a regular training regime and a strong mental discipline to not back down. Learning to enjoy this process and stick with it has been another important personal victory for me.

## What about your principles?

Many of my core principles were shaped by my family, which had a profound influence on me. I was fortunate to grow up in a nurturing environment, in a complete family characterized by high moral values, supportiveness, and kindness. I am deeply grateful for this upbringing, as it provided a stable and positive foundation in my life.

Additionally, my experiences at the camp I mentioned earlier helped to solidify my understanding of my life’s guidelines. The key principles that guide me are: being kind, always assuming the best in people unless proven otherwise, striving to do my best, and always doing what's right. These are the values that I hold dear and try to live by in my daily life.

## Have you had anyone who influenced you a lot?

Certainly, my mother stands out as a pivotal influence in my life. She is a strong and wise woman who has been an exceptional mother. I believe I inherited her strength and wisdom, and she has been a mentor in shaping my approach to relationships and motherhood.

Another significant influence was the camp director who hired me in my late teens. Being an older and experienced figure in her 50s, she took me under her wing. As an international staff member, I was welcomed into her home and treated like family. Her passion for the camp's environment deeply inspired me, and I learned a great deal from her mentorship.

However, the biggest influence comes from my husband who is my best friend, my soulmate and my ‘partner in crime’ throughout the last 23 years. He knows how to support me, stimulate my personal growth, boost my energy and spirits, and give me the freedom and resources I need to continuously grow and achieve my goals. He is a high-achiever as well which inspires me to do more and aim higher all the time. I? am truly blessed to have such incredible support by my side!

In Estonia, my experiences have been enriched by many people I've encountered through my work. Depending on the situation, anyone I interact with could serve as a mentor at that moment. For example, even completing this interview has sparked new thoughts for me. So, my mentors are the numerous individuals who contribute to my growth with their unique perspectives and insights, rather than just one specific person.

## Do you do anything for your self-expression?

I have explored various talents, one of which is sewing. I particularly enjoyed making dresses for my daughter when she was younger, especially because she was actively involved in singing competitions and performances. Instead of buying outfits, I preferred creating unique dresses for her, a skill I learned from my mom.

While I initially thought I had a knack for drawing, and I've even completed a few paintings, I now view them with a more critical eye. Nevertheless, I'm glad I gave it a try. Gardening is another passion of mine, likely influenced by my Ukrainian heritage. Growing up, we had three dachas where we cultivated everything from tomatoes to potatoes. Although I no longer need to garden out of necessity, I still maintain a greenhouse at home where I grow tomatoes. It's more for enjoyment and to relive the flavors of my childhood.

## Are you reading books?

I do enjoy reading, though not as much as I would like, given the demands of my job, family, and life in general. Often, I find myself running out of time, and when I do settle down with a book in the evening, exhaustion takes over, and I tend to fall asleep. However, I find that traveling, particularly on flights, offers the perfect opportunity to immerse myself in a book without distractions.

The most recent book I've read, which was recommended by my colleagues, is 'The Strategy of Blue Oceans.' It's more intellectually stimulating than a leisurely read, and it really made me think deeply about various topics. Though it's not a light read like a detective novel, I found it to be very insightful.

I'm currently on the lookout for new reading material, but finding the right book can be challenging. Much of my reading time is occupied with work-related materials, such as healthcare legislation and digital policies, for advocacy work. While this reading is necessary, it's not always what I would choose for leisure. I'm definitely open to suggestions for books that could capture my interest and offer a break from professional reading.

Thank you!

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