The Intentional Path: Life Transitions & Embracing the Mess

On My Mind: Life Transitions

With summer ending and school starting again, I have been reflecting on the past few hectic months. I feel grateful to have ended the season with an amazing family vacation. Of course, as with any family vacation, it had its hiccups, but even those unfortunate events turned into memories we will laugh at for a lifetime. (Like when we paid 17x more for a cab than we should have, and then I got pooped on by a bird while I was fuming over it).??

When we return from vacation, people always assume we are feeling relaxed and energized. Ha! If only that were the case. While my time away did not leave me feeling relaxed, I did experience a mindset shift. Being outside of our normal routine and spending quality time as a family gave me a new perspective, which has made this overwhelming season a little easier.?

There has been a lot happening at once in my world, both personally and professionally. It has been a significant month for our family. I dropped our oldest child off at college last week, a day I had dreaded for over a year. Whenever people asked me about this day, I could feel tears building up. My coach noticed that I was living in a fog because this emotion was taking up so much of my CPU cycles daily, and she told me to cry it out and not let it bottle up. That day came last Wednesday, and it was, to my surprise, an amazing day. I of course felt the anticipated sadness as I reflected on my 4 pound baby growing up and leaving home, but it only took a few minutes before I was overcome with excitement and happiness for her future ahead. I feel proud of who she has become and thankful for the friendship we will cherish moving forward. The sadness creeps up in moments like family dinner when I miss her being there, but the fog has lifted and I now feel more excited than sad for her next chapter and the possibilities ahead.?

While this season has been one of significant personal and professional milestones, it has honestly been a difficult one for me. If you are also feeling overwhelmed, or perhaps frustrated that you aren’t ending the summer feeling restored, know that you are not alone.?

Purpose & Productivity: Embracing The Mess

Everything happening at once is a sentiment I am all too familiar with. But aren’t we all? Whether you’re juggling taking care of your family with managing a team, or trying to take care of yourself while moving your career forward, it’s a lot – in fact, it’s too much.?

Especially over the past month, I have found myself wishing for a press pause button so I can slow down and take one step at a time. The reality is, of course, that the clock keeps ticking forward without a pause and I have to find a way to show up the next day no matter how behind or impossible things may be.?

I committed myself long ago to try my best to accept life as it comes. Embracing the mess is easier said than done. For me, it looks like being OK with myself when I am nowhere having everything under control. It means things are falling through the cracks and I don't know how to catch them. It means allowing myself to get some sleep even though I am letting people down. It means reminding my family that I am far from perfect and encouraging them to not strive for perfection either.?

I used to get down on myself a lot more whenever life felt chaotic or messy, but I am getting better as I practice falling apart. And what's interesting is that after these challenging, everything-happening-at-once moments, things always get better. They push me forward to make positive changes for both myself and the people around me.

What would allowing yourself to embrace the mess look like for you? Is there an area of your life where you are being too hard on yourself and could try letting go? I would love to hear your thoughts on this.

Monthly Me List

In case you missed last month, a Me List is a list that forces me to put my oxygen mask on first. A coach encouraged me to do this years ago, and I encourage you to do the same. I am still learning to do this, and I would not say I am good at this yet, but I see how it helps my family and my work when I am taking care of myself, so I want to encourage you all to try it.

At the top of this month’s Me List is taking time to read (actually listen) to a fascinating book: Building a Second Brain: A Proven Method to Organize Your Digital Life and Unlock Your Creative Potential. I am taking notes on a new way to organize the overload of information I encounter daily.?

People always roll their eyes when I tell them I am reading. How could I have time to read?? I’ll let you in on my secret: I create time to read with my ears. I have slowly learned to read with my ears with faster playback speed, and I can now finish an 8-hour audiobook in 3 hours. And I can tell you that I’m definitely not listening to books while sipping a drink under an umbrella! I am squeezing it in between things, like on a 7-minute drive (if I don’t have calls) or during the cold morning run.?

Other things on my Me List this month:

• Take off Labor Day Weekend and be present for the family. Nine years ago I wrote about a scary phone call I received when I was away from my kids on Labor Day and how it shifted how I spend my time: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-phone-call_b_5694477
• Make time to get a massage

And embrace the mess and accept that there is no “right” way other than doing my best.

Yoky