Inspiring

When your child dies, it feels like the whole world looks at you and asks you how you get out of bed every morning. The truth is that two years ago, I would have thought the same thing. I would have wondered how it was physically possible for a mom to go on living without her child.

Almost two years later, I have gotten up every single morning and lived my life. Some days are extremely tough, others are easier, but overall, every day, I get out of bed for one simple reason--my daughter Colette. My beloved Coco is my inspiration. On my bedside table, I have a small frame given kindly to me by my husband's cousin and in it, a picture of Colette. I have it there for two reasons: (1) so I can say goodnight to her every night and (2) so that there is a physical reminder each morning of my inspiration.

My beloved Coco is my inspiration.

Once I get going, my mental pictures and the many reminders I have of Colette continue to inspire and push me along the day. And then I get the chance to be inspired by so many more. I am inspired by every single family we help who are living life after loss, or dealing with the fear and unknown of a child in the NICU, or with a child with special needs, or uncertainty about their pregnancy and its outcome. I am inspired by the social workers, nurses, and doctors who deal with all of these emotions on a daily basis, who feel the impact of loss as well and still manage to get up another day to do it all again.

My mental pictures and the many reminders I have of Colette continue to inspire and push me along the day.

On a personal level, I am inspired by the friends I already have and all the friends I have made since losing Colette, who have dealt with NICU stays, children in and out of hospitals, and dealing with special needs children. I am inspired by my younger sister who was a preemie herself and now is a badass, black belt in karate, who gives of herself as a social worker. I am inspired by my parents who were parents to a preemie and who continued to have PTSD and worry about their kids' health, even to this day. I am inspired by my husband who even after losing Colette remains an eternal optimist. I am even inspired by our gestational carrier because it amazes me that there are people so willing to give of themselves to complete strangers.

I am inspired by my younger sister who was a preemie herself and now is a badass, black belt in karate, who gives of herself as a social worker.

Who are you inspired by? I would love to hear!