Insights from monk life: Why more is less?

This Friday, I began my day early to connect with the team in the U.S. By late afternoon, I ventured out to a nearby farm to buy some vegetables and enjoy a meal. For a single day’s earnings, I could purchase several months' worth of food. However, the farmer seemed to be living from one day to the next, despite their hard work. Some might argue that farming requires less skill/intelligence, leading to lower pay, but I couldn’t disagree more; I’ve spent years as a farmer myself.

In a world where wealth often breeds inequality, I've realized the transformative power of generosity. My life as a monk and later as a farmer taught me that true abundance lies not just in financial success but in how we share our resources.

People with?some understanding of economics and finances already know about unequal distribution of wealth. I am not going to talk all that here. I am coming here to share something that I felt runs deeper. As wealth becomes easier to acquire for a section of people, it skews our expectations of giving and taking in relationships.

We get a sense of entitlement and assume we'd get more for little or for next to nothing. We even actively seek out deals like that. The imbalance leads us to expect more from others while giving little in return, even in relationships, it is a conditioning and it creates isolation leading to loneliness and a kind of depravity.

Think of life as a garden. If you take from it without giving back—whether by planting seeds or nurturing the plants—it will eventually wither. Wealth can often contribute to societal imbalance, which is a stark reality today

On the contrary, if individuals possessing wealth become aware of larger working of nature, they realize that the wealth that has come to them has come because of efforts and achievements from people in the past and present, from resources of Earth. Yes, they have put effort, so they have this wealth, but others indeed have a share and it is up to them to distribute it fairly, share. Then you feel a greater sense of responsibility with increase in wealth, and cultivate greater capacity to do good.

With clarity and a sense of fairness you think of ways of giving back to family, community and spending in a way that gives back to Earth. This sets the wheel back in balance and happiness, life thrives.?

You feel a greater sense of responsibility with increase in wealth, and cultivate greater capacity to do good. This sets the wheel back in balance and happiness, life thrives.?

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Here's a bit of my story:?

During graduation, I stood first at Delhi University. I was also supporting my studies by freelancing as an editor for Cambridge University Press. I then?joined an IT company and thought this is it, I made it. But I noticed I started to become stingier as I was getting richer. I wanted more rewards for less effort,?this attitude encroached?on me subtly and low-key without my?knowledge. The environment around me was so supportive of this, with supermarkets overflowing with cheap food, and the same went for clothes and shoes. While I was aware of sweatshops and recognized that someone, somewhere was paying the price for the comfort I enjoyed, I felt trapped by the city's regulations. I couldn't keep cows or grow my own food due to a lack of space and time. Growing food didn't give monetary value for my time. I chose to stay in the city and rely on supermarkets even though I knew about broad 'exploitation' of farmers, and the realization filled me with guilt, yet I found myself losing genuine empathy because I felt powerless to change the situation.? My loneliness was increasing. I lost my appetite, felt no real hunger, and derived little enjoyment from things.

Strangely, despite eating well, I grew anemic and started to lose bone mass for no apparent reason. I was otherwise healthy, but just felt weak and lost interest in life. I ended up seeking intense activities like paragliding and kayaking in big rivers just to feel a sense of "life" in me. Eventually, I left it all to become a farmer and stayed outside IT for many years, working on forest farms, organic farms in western ghats in India. This was before Corona, so work from home wasn't really a norm. I spent all my savings over the years and ultimately grew poor, mysteriously I was gaining youthfulness and health. *Meanwhile, meditation was always a part of my life. I was taking silent retreats for meditation once a year on average for the past 22 years. That was always there. I spend more than two hours of the day meditating upright in half lotus posture, no matter where I am or how busy.?

When I was a struggling farmer, people would often say, "Farmers are amazing; they feed the world!" But here’s the kicker: if I mentioned I worked for a big-name company like Microsoft, the respect I received was real. It’s fascinating how money and tech jobs can unlock doors of social acceptance! And l I became a lot more desirable as a potential partner in those circles.

Personally, I knew I wasn't good enough as the?farmers ... I wasn't as willing to give/share and wasn't as happy inherently. The simple farmers were incredibly resilient, with families that seemed to thrive in a way I couldn't help but admire. Their laughter had a unique ring to it—an echo of freedom and carefree living. They were always ready to share, often tossing in a few extra vegetables just for good measure. In their company, I felt like family, and our conversations about life were rich and meaningful. They lived more life!

This was something I'd not find even in a tech environment. To this day, my connections with farming friends are much deeper than any relationships I’ve formed in publishing or technology. Here’s what I realized: when a society is truly tilted and rich getting?richer relying on unequal pay and exploitation of a section of people ... this section of people get used to giving less and receiving more. This same dynamic extends to relationships—you expect more while giving very little in return. Outcome is loneliness.? We are human and it would happen to the best of us. It is also very subtle. We can. of course, close our eyes to it, affects us nevertheless.

Wealth, when approached with intention and awareness, can be a powerful tool for creating abundance not only for us but also for the community and society at large. With greater wealth, comes greater responsibility. You become the treasurer of the resources of the Earth and have the power to use it for the good of others.

Microcosm is inbuilt in the macro, and macro in the micro. We know systematically disrupting ecosystems affects ourselves in the long run. What about the opposite? When we work for everyone's benefit, we are in fact working towards our own happiness, isn't it? Key is in learning how to do this, and what are the values and vision that drive this sense of purpose. Skillful giving comes by practicing it and learning incrementally from experience.

Farmers are indeed more skilled in life and in their profession. Farming requires a higher level?more diverse set skills of skills apart from grit and physical strength. They know about soil, weather, moisture, seed preservation, storage, pest control .... endless stuff. Farmers also face the?sun, rain and frost as we work from temperature controlled environments. I don't?see a reason why they should be paid less ...but that's a discussion for another day.

*Expectation of Minimal Effort: Research suggests that when people are accustomed to receiving without significant effort, they may develop an implicit belief that they should not have to exert themselves in relationships either. This attitude stems from a psychological phenomenon called the “entitlement mentality,” where individuals feel justified in expecting more from others while giving less in return. This can lead to shallow connections, as the expectation is not matched by genuine investment from either party.