Inside-Out Networking
Ashutosh Singh
Life and Consistency Coach | Helping you stay consistent with Self-love and Emotional Wellness
Do you find it difficult to network with people?
As an introvert, I have faced this challenge a lot.
One of the biggest challenges I faced when it came to networking with people,
1.) I can't do small talk.
2.) I can't fake and say things I don't feel like saying, meaning I can't force myself to do it.
Later I learned networking does not have to be that way; what if I have my own way of networking with people that work for me?
To be honest, I never even liked the word networking; it was something that I found shallow.
Therefore, I don't really network with people; I form a connection with them.
May seem like a wordplay, but different words carry different meanings.
In order to form connections, I realized there are basically 3 barriers hold people back,
1.) Mindset
What is the first thing you notice about a person?
Beyond a person's face, colour, nationality, caste, religion, gender, occupation, age, experience, clothes etc, there is something common between any person you are going to meet; what is that?
It is the most obvious thing.
Just like you, they are human.
They are human first and anything else later.
This is one of the most basic things that we know already, but ignore it all the time.
How often do you perceive someone as just human?
We always get lost in what they do, their looks, gender, skills, experience, etc.
If they are human, there is more in common between any person you are going to meet; there are more similarities than differences, and that means there is so much to talk about.
When we come from that mindset, it becomes easier for us to counter the biggest barrier of all.
What is that?
Barrier number 2,
2.) Judgement
Usually, what stops us from connecting with people,
Either it is our judgment about ourselves or the other person.
The?world around us is our mirror, and judging someone does not define who?they?are—it defines who?we?are. More often than not, the things?we judge in others are a reflection of the things we cannot accept about ourselves.
It is because of judgment,
Sometimes, we are caught up in trying too hard to make an impression, trying to act cooler or funnier than we are.
But
People actually love authenticity, and if you are faking it, they will always know, maybe not on the conscious level but definitely on the subconscious level. And they will never talk to you again. (lol)
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Also, when we are being authentic, it means we are not coming from a place of judgment.
The final barrier is that we wait for things to happen.
Imagine you go to a restaurant, and you are really hungry, and find a place in the corner to sit; now there are no waiters; this a self-service restaurant.
You think of all the things you want to eat, and if you keep thinking about it, how likely are the chances that food will come to you?
Zero
Has it ever happened to you that you are sitting next to a person, they look at you, you look at them, you smile, and go back to doing what you were doing?
During that time, both people are thinking if they should introduce themselves. Sometimes it happens, and sometimes it does not.
What you don't realize is that people around you are also watching this exchange. They are seeing what kind of a person you are and if you are open to talking.
When people perceive that you are open to talking, people are more likely to approach you.
The final barrier is
3.) Not making the first move.
The first move can be as simple as a Handshake or Namstey.
Don't worry about what to say; if you are not in your head, you will always know what to say, and the conversation will flow naturally.
Being the first to shake hands shows confidence and makes you seem much more approachable.
You'll also increase the number of people that you'll develop relationships with.
Some people are too shy to make the first move, but they secretly do want to get to know you. By always making sure you introduce yourself first, you'll make it easier for other introverts to get to know you.
Work on these aspects, and enjoy networking like a pro.
Love and Cheers
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1 年We all are already connected with each other though invisible spiritual strings. If only we connect more with love, we could connect more with others too :)
Let the god guide you in happier and sad moments .Cos he never stops loving whatever be the reason or moment in your life. He never judges you anytime.
1 年I totally relate to what you have said. Whenever I hear this word of networking I feel this is not my cup of coffee to move ahead build the network so that I get opportunities through them