An Inner Journey of Ahimsa — 4 Jan 2022

A friend called today to share about how a comment they made at work was misconstrued as a remark bordering on sexual harassment and led to an investigation that has been going on for several months now, and how they have been feeling low and stuck as a result. I noticed, even as I was listening to them, the subtle violence in me of wanting to side with the woman in the situation, even though I did not know the woman involved. It took a lot of effort to centre myself, not take sides, and stay truly available for my friend who needed to be held in that moment.

Much as gender-based violence across the world is skewed heavily against non-males, the solutions to it can arise only when men are also involved in the process. Often, our collective anger towards men does not allow for collaboration, and sometimes, even conversation. As someone who has been on several corporate committees to deal with sexual harassment, I notice in myself, and in systems, the anti-male stance that committees go into investigations with. Historical trends cannot be ignored, but if our present is made accountable for the past, we stand in the way of reconciliation.

Yoga speaks of ahimsa as the attitude of striving for justice. However, it does not speak of justice as a personal matter, but as a higher ideal. Therefore, when we reduce justice to a matter of revenge, or personal fairness, we take away something from it. To maintain order in our systems, rules, regulations and penalties are useful. However, simply imposing them without following them up with dialogue and reconciliation only serves personal egos and does not lead to systemic changes. As a result, trends such as gender-based violence continue because we deal with them through a personal lens instead of a systemic one.

· What does gender-based violence bring up for you?

· Is there a non-violent way to work with the issue?

#AnInnerJourneyOfAhimsa #RukminiIyer #ExultSolutions #peacebuilding #nonviolence