Inner Conflicts Limiting Your Success? Here’s how to dissolve them and move on!

Inner conflict. That awful sensation of tension that stops us from moving forward. We’ve all experienced it and boy does it matter, because how you feel directly impacts what you do – or don’t do. When you’re conflicted, you’re stuck.

Sound familiar?

The last thing I want to be is one of those pushy salespeople!

Describing it that way won’t work because leaving this info out would be less than honest, but explaining all of it just turns people off.

I’m not as experienced/confident/talented/bold as that other advisor.

No one gets the value of what I’m selling. It’s not sexy. It’s too complicated.

He’s a billionaire and I’m not. Why would he take me seriously?

ABC institution has a better rate. I’ve lost before I even pick up the phone.

I’ll never be good enough, no matter what I do or how hard I try. (This hidden one is surprisingly common. I’ve had to wrestle with it, too.)

Every one of these inner conflicts keeps you running around in a circle, and stuck where you are. 

Case in point

An Advisor I’m working with is excited to get a great tax planning strategy in front of business owners. It’s an elegant solution, but complicated to describe. He is trapped in what I call ‘Expert-itis’. While understanding the intricacies of setting this up is an obvious necessity and advantage, he gets lost in the details and feels almost like he is lying if he doesn’t share all the permutations up front.

But if he does get into the weeds, eyes glaze over and he loses their interest. There it is. Inner conflict. Which leads to paralysis. And momentum stalls out.

This is where I come in.

I pull your brilliance out of you and get it onto the page, in alignment with your deepest held values, so that every time you communicate, you captivate clients and feel more whole.  This is what I am best at and what I most love to do.

When you are in alignment, you are being real. You are being authentic. 

This is a strong signal to your subconscious mind that you are a good person who works with integrity. Now you are in a virtuous cycle, wherein each time you communicate from this place, your prospect or client subconsciously knows you’re the real deal, and you know it, too. They trust you and you trust yourself. They hire you. You build confidence, brick by brick, on something good and real.

You feel good when you are talking to clients and prospects. You are calm and grounded. There is no inner conflict about ‘bothering people’ or ‘being pushy’ because you know you are neither of those things. You trust yourself. You trust your own motives. You don’t have to prove you’re a good person of integrity. You simply are. 

Chasing sales targets because your job requires you to, or because you have to pay the bills, or your ego wants the high of hitting that number, will certainly propel you forward in the short run. But it is an emotionally exhausting way to live, often littered with inner conflict, and many Advisors hit a wall. 

Every time you bump up against inner resistance, catch yourself. 

Notice when your mind says:

I can’t do that until…

That won’t work, because…

Ugh. I’m just not up for it today…

I should really do that, but it’s so uncomfortable. I don’t want to!

I can’t say that to a client because…

I need sales but I don’t want to feel needy when I make my calls.

I’m trapped… I’m stuck…

This is a problem because…

If I knew how to explain it, then I would…

If only they understood the value of…

Have you spotted something? Did your chest or stomach or throat get tight as you read those phrases? Notice how every one of these inner conflicts stops you from taking action.

These inner conflicts represent your current ceiling on success.

It doesn’t have to be this way.

So long as what you are selling is a product or service of value, you can be at ease with sales. You can feel confident and good in your own skin while talking to people about something you hope they will buy.

My work with Advisors has gotten deeper over the years. In the first decade, I was excited to help you master all aspects of sales conversations. How to set up great meeting flow, engage with effective questions, handle objections, articulate your value, make recommendations in a compelling way, close business, etc… 

Then I became deeply invested in helping you build professional and personal confidence. That, along with sales mastery helped many Advisors become even more successful and satisfied in their work.

Both of those focal points are still foundational to my work with Advisors.

But now, approaching my twentieth year of coaching financial professionals, my interest has gone even deeper. 

I am most interested in you as a person. 

In helping you walk forward feeling good and strong and whole. So that what you do and how you work aligns with your deepest values and is free from inner conflict. From this place, success of all the best kinds can spring and nourish your soul.

Too touchy feely? Yeah, then I’m probably not your gal.

But if this hits the mark, know that I am All-In. I care about you. You can say anything to me in coaching space and know that you are free from judgment and that your confidentiality will be respected. 

I’m a coach, not a therapist. That’s important to know. Our focus is business, but always in the context of you as a whole person, deserving of genuine care and the deepest respect. You’re not just a professional, here to accumulate skills. 

You can laugh, you can swear. You can be crabby, if that’s how you’re feeling on any given day. You can cry. If that should happen, all good, too. And of course, you can be fierce and focused and crazy ambitious. And if all you want are the sales skills, I’ve got you covered. You can be in your first five years, or in year thirty. Regardless, your sales and confidence will increase.

Right here, right now, wherever you’re at, wherever you’re starting from, is perfect, and I’d love to work with you.

If you are intrigued, message me on LinkedIn and we can schedule a conversation.