Inner Chatter ???

After a few days away from work and life—no kids, no obligations, paddling on the water, connecting deeply with my love, tromping in the woods, staying off my devices—I noticed that my inner chatter got really quiet. Then I came home and it revved up again: the to-dos, the judgments, the ideas, the decisions, all noisy and clattering inside my head.

What is inner chatter? It’s involuntary mind-manufactured noise. These are the thoughts you think when you’re not actively thinking about something. For most of us, this chatter is constant. It may be so pervasive you don’t even realize it’s there.

Take a moment to get quiet. Close your eyes and stop thinking. What happens? Does your mind stay empty, or do thoughts begin to pop up like mushrooms? Does your mind begin to dart around, grasping for something, anything to focus on?

What does your mind say?

Does it start thinking about tomorrow and next week and next month and all the things you need to plan?

Does it start thinking about the things you did wrong, the mistakes you made, the frustrations you have?

Is your inner voice mean? Do you chastise and judge yourself? Do you compare yourself to others? Do you yell at yourself like a mean teacher?

Do you notice different voices, different personas jockeying for control? Different parts of you that want different things?

Is your inner voice big on possibility and wishful thinking, like mine? Does it paint pretty pictures or reframe the past to make it sound better?

Whatever it is, remember that your inner chatter is like dreaming: most of us have no control over the thoughts that come in, just as we lack control over our dreams.

We can, however, develop this ability. We can learn to still our minds, hold and focus our energy, and think intentionally and only as necessary. We can develop the ability to use our minds as tools rather than letting our thoughts lead us helter-skelter like leaves blowing in the wind.

How?

By practicing inner silence. This can be attained through meditation, breath work and movement. Through these practices we learn about ourselves—we can witness how our minds operate, and notice the patterns that run us.

Practice: Set a timer and sit for 5-10 minutes in silence with your eyes closed. Begin by paying attention to your breath, and see how long you can keep your attention on your breath. Whenever a thought comes in, let it drift away. Do your best to catch yourself when you’re pulled into a thought and return to your breath.

After the practice, journal about the tone of the thoughts. For instance, “I noticed that I tend to think about what I need to do. I also get sucked into thoughts about other people doing things that I feel are unfair.”

You can also write down any ideas that came through that you want to explore later. “The next podcast episode will be about fostering deep connection through service. Sit with this some more.”

When you witness your thought patterns, you gain the ability to change them. You can let the unhelpful thoughts go rather than diving into them. You can intentionally choose what to think about when it’s time to think. You can catch yourself thinking things you know are untrue and rather than following the thoughts, you can simply let them go.

Key takeaway: Practicing inner silence liberates us from the grip of our minds. It enables us to focus our attention with intent. In addition to being able to think intentionally and make good choices, inner silence also opens us up to ideas.

Catching Ideas

One of the great epiphanies I’ve had as a writer came when I started paying attention to the difference between the writing that flows through me and the writing that is the result of hard thinking. When I’m thinking too hard about what I’m trying to say, the messages become trite or garbled. I use longer sentences and words that make me sound smart rather than simply transmitting the idea. I get stuck in my head and make the writing about me—even when what I’m trying to communicate has nothing to do with me.

When I open myself up to the flow of ideas, I write and create my best work. When I get my mind, my internal editor and filters out of the way, I am able to receive and transmit ideas with clarity. You can feel the power of these words very differently from the ones I’ve engineered.

I belong to the camp of creators who believe that we don’t “have” ideas, but rather ideas come to us when we’re quiet enough and paying attention. Most of my best writing is done early in the morning when my mind is quiet. I often record myself with my eyes closed while feeling the connection with my heart and my womb. This way, I simply channel what comes through. It’s much easier than “trying” to write something good. I don’t know where the ideas originate: whether they’re inside me or coming to me from somewhere else. It frankly doesn’t matter. Whether I’m writing a story about something I experienced, or something I’ve learned, the greatest insights come through my body, not my mind. My mind is simply the translator that makes the transmissions intelligible.

Key takeaway: When I’m busy thinking about all of the things that need to be done or trying to make something sound smart, I don’t have access to deep insights. Getting out of the thinking allows space for ideas and epiphanies to come through.

It’s been?two weeks since I’ve been home from the woods and I’m grateful for this reset and reminder to witness my thoughts. I feel much more grounded and clear.

Are you willing to take a few minutes today to get quiet and witness your thoughts? I’d love to hear how it goes and what you notice as a result.

Have a beautiful week!

Love always,?

LJ

P.S.?The next Connect Retreat is coming up on June 29 and will be an opportunity to practice getting quiet, learning about your mind-manufactured drama, and shift the way you operate. We still have a few spaces open.