Infusing AI. A Guide to the Great Tea-Based Delusion

Mr. Enterprise: “Our platform is now fully AI-infused.”

Tech Leader: “Oh, wow! So, like… it learns and adapts?”

Mr. Enterprise: “Exactly. AI is woven into the fabric of our solution.”

Tech Leader: “Right, but how? What does it do?”

Mr. Enterprise: “…It’s infused.”

This is the moment I lose the will to live.

As a Serious Technology Leader (STL), I have sat through too many vendor meetings where someone—usually a well-groomed individual with a disturbingly confident smile—claims their product is?infused?with AI like some artisanal gin. They say this with reverence, as if merely uttering the phrase makes their software a sentient being ready to?synergise and revolutionise?my entire tech stack.

Let’s be clear: “AI-infused” is not a technical term. It is a vibe.

It does not tell me if AI is actually doing anything useful. It does not tell me if it’s a fundamental part of the product or just an afterthought. It is a phrase specifically engineered to sound impressive while revealing nothing. And, more often than not, it means the latter.

What “AI-Infused” Actually Means

When you strip away the marketing gloss, “AI-infused” usually translates to:

• Bolted-On AI (BOAI?) – A chatbot was hastily strapped to the front end, offering answers that range from “mildly helpful” to “existentially concerning.”
• Random Predictive Analytics (RPA—but not the useful kind) – Somewhere, a dashboard now contains a chart labelled “AI-powered insights.” What does it actually predict? Unclear.
• Machine Learning Sprinkle (MLS) – A few lines of TensorFlow were added so they could put “AI-powered” in the press release. Actual impact: negligible.
• Automated Nonsense Generator (ANG) – A recommendation engine now suggests things nobody asked for, like enterprise software that suddenly thinks your organisation needs 47 copies of the same license.

Expectation Inflation. The Real AI Problem

The issue isn’t just that AI is often bolted on rather than deeply integrated—it’s that the phrase “AI-infused” creates unrealistic expectations. When the business hears it, it assumes we’ve deployed?Fully Autonomous Neural Intelligence Technology? (FANIT?), an omniscient system that optimises workflows, anticipates problems, and possibly replaces middle management.

Spoiler: It won’t.

In reality, we end up with an overpriced chatbot and a confused CFO demanding to know why we spent six figures on an AI feature that still requires a human to fix its mistakes. Meanwhile, CTOs have to explain to the board that our new “AI-powered” system cannot actually think for itself—it just seems smarter because we changed the font on the UI.

How to Tell If AI Is More Than Just a Marketing Buzzword

So, how do you separate real AI integration from the thinly steeped variety? Simple—ask questions that cut through the nonsense:

• What specific tasks is AI automating or improving? If they can’t answer this in under 30 seconds, it’s probably fluff.
• How does it learn and adapt over time? If the answer involves the words “black box” or “proprietary algorithms,” assume it doesn’t.
• What measurable benefits have actual customers seen? Case studies should show real impact, not just “improved engagement” (a phrase that means absolutely nothing).

Brewing AI with Purpose

AI should not be a garnish—it should be baked into the product in a way that genuinely improves efficiency, user experience, and decision-making. If it’s just there for the sake of being there, it’s Artificial Artificial Intelligence (AAI?)—a fancy term for software that pretends to be smart but is really just a set of glorified IF-statements.

So, next time a vendor proudly declares that their software is “AI-infused,” I suggest responding with a simple question:

“Are we talking a properly steeped Earl Grey, or just a cup of lukewarm water that once sat near a tea bag?”

Because if it’s the latter, I’m not buying.