India - my love

Even the title is a challenge. It presupposes that all I experience of India can be summarised under one banner. When the Taj Palace was attacked 5 years ago in Mumbai a number of potential delegates for our courses questioned whether it would be safe to come to India. I pointed out that Mumbai is as far from Cherai (the venue for the courses) as London is from Germany or Denmark! Would you have thought about cancelling a trip to London after the terrorist attack in Denmark recently?

I love India. There are things about it I hate too - the filth that accumulates in the rivers and the backwaters, the sight of so many people with deformed or missing limbs, the dilution of the elegance of the Indian dress by the the more vulgar European dress code so often adopted by tourists in the seaside areas, the unbearably sweet brown water that is passed off as tea on the trains and in the train stations, the neglected animals and the ugly constructions built in an attempt to hold back the sea in times of Tsunamis.

But I love the traffic (yes I really do - everyone has to take care of themselves, I have to take great care not to continue in the Indian way when I am back in the UK), the universal acknowledgment of God and the consequential spiritual freedom that I certainly feel, the extremes of the saree clad women and the naked sadhus who come down out of the mountains from no one knows exactly where, the nutritious and so easily digestible breakfasts (curry for breakfast?!! is a comment I often receive from my European friends). Yes and I miss it so much now that I am back in the UK. I love the laughter and the freedom that I witness in the children in Cherai, Kerala and in the SOS childrens home, the constant greetings and smiles, the generosity, the ‘Guest is God’ approach to visitors, the acceptance that I experience despite many of the historical barbarous acts of the British. I love that death feels very close in India - it enriches my love of life. And I realise that my experience is formed by the care and guardianship of our very dear Indian friends and that in another state and another time it would be undoubtedly different.

I feel safer in India than I do walking down Slough High Street. There is nothing that happens in India that does not happen elsewhere in the world. There are of course exceptions. I would be very surprised if it was reported that a lorry driver stopping on the side of the road for a 'break' in the UK was dragged off and eaten by a leopard (as was reported on part of our planned bike route this year) unless one had escaped from a local zoo! One of the main differences I believe is that with the difference in density of population it is easier to conceal what happens in other parts of the world. Whatever we do in India .. requires no CCTV cameras for just about everyone in the vicinity to know.

The more I have learnt about India the more I realise I have to learn. I discovered early on that what I touch and push around with my feet is very significant and usually inappropriate and paper on the floor is a blasphemy - God is in the paper. I know that my left hand is a no no when eating … and that taking just what I need (rather than piling up my plate with everything on offer) is much more appropriate and respectful of those who have so very little to eat elsewhere, I did only learn last year though that to blow my nose in public is not a ‘done’ thing and certainly not to lift any part of a saree to cool off even for a moment .. oh I have learnt by many mistakes and I continue to do so. I value so much the respect that is given to me as a teacher and I find it hugely challenging to live up the expectation and responsibility that comes with that.

I marvel at the success of my friends' arranged marriages.. and the belief that we learn to love with time. and I admire those women who give up everything to serve the family of their husband and how they find a way to cope in some of the most demanding of scenarios. I am in awe of the strength of the women who live in the ‘sheet’ houses around us and their proud demeanour, as with Rosie Lee in the photo above.

I feel associated in India. It truly is a bombardment of the senses - the colours, the noise, the people, the spices … and perhaps because of that I am especially affected by events there .. and hence my TEDx talk on the Delhi rape but not as means of chastising India but of highlighting something that reflects on us all wherever we are in the world. At the same time I was concerned about how any news has a tendency to be generalised and assumed to be true for the whole of the country ..

This is but a snapshot. Maybe I will write some more of my love of the Himalayas, the wondrous tea plantations in Tamil Nadu and Kerala, the richness of the languages, the astonishing festivals, the awe inspiring martial arts, the grace and spirituality of the yoga. 'Do they speak Indian everywhere?' I am asked by European tourists!! Which is just about as good a question as 'Do I know of any Indian restaurants nearby'? I mean what other kind of restaurant would there be!

What can I say?. I have worked in India for a long time and have chosen never to take money out of the country, to give most of my training for my Indian colleagues for free. What I get in return is a sense of family, an undying love and friendship and learning beyond measure. No-one could possibly have the same experience but you will only find out what it is like for you if you do experience it. Come to India .. you may love it, you may hate it but you will be amazed … and you just might fall in love …

https://www.sueknight.com/Programmes/wt/kerala.htm