Independence vs Interdependence

We gain wisdom by reflection, imitation and /or experience.

I am a solo traveller! I love my solo sojourns. They are very therapeutic and broadens my outlook in embracing solitude, diverse culture, people, behaviour and discover my own actions, reactions and decisions. In nutshell, it makes me appreciate my own life a little more!

During my solo trip exploring the most revered country – Japan, one of the experiences taught me the essence of?independence vs interdependence!

The reason I choose Japan for a solo trip is because of it being the safest and one of the most beautiful countries in the world in terms of its natural beauty, culture and development. I was equally intrigued to see the country that had faced one of the worst nightmares of the Second World War – the atomic bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The worst experiment that a human mind could have manifested! However, its resurrection after the tragedy is a testament of collective conscience, resilience, determination, compassion and discipline as a Nation. It is the most intriguing case study to witness how this small country, despite the worst man-made calamity stood back up on its feet and transformed itself into the most respectful, developed and safest nation in the world.

There is something in the air of Japan where owing to its simplicity, culture, honesty and helpfulness, even the travellers tend to drop their guards and simply enjoy!

While my trip had multiple places to explore, I was deeply looking forward to visit Hiroshima to experience the transformation the city underwent, like a phoenix rising from the ashes!

My trip to Hiroshima was sandwiched into a day-long trip from Kyoto to Himeji Castle to Hiroshima and then back to Kyoto (all of just 800km in a day)! Well, this was possible when I had Japan’s Shinkansen (bullet train) at my disposal.

I started my day very early to reach Himeji Castle by 9am so that I could wrap up castle visit by noon to take the connecting train to Hiroshima and spend maximum time there.

In Hiroshima, my plan was to take a public bus from the station that would take me directly to the Hiroshima Peace Memorial site and thereafter take the hop-on-hop-off bus tour to see the city. Little did I know what I would be encountering in Hiroshima will be one of the many cherished moments of my life!

The moment I came out of the railway station, I noticed a public bus that was about to leave. The driver saw me and halted for me to board the bus. I somehow boarded the bus, miserably balancing my backpack, umbrella, and a big map of the city. I looked around to find a place for myself, only to notice a lady (looked like a European) beckoning me to sit beside her. With the bus suddenly started, I was about to lose my balance, when the lady very warmly held my hand and helped me to settle down next to her. As I collected my stuff and placed them inside my bag, she started the conversation- “Are you an Indian?” Landing a big smile, I confirmed my nationality and asked her whereabouts. She smiled and shared that she was French and was visiting Japan as part of her annual solo trip. There, we had a mutual connection!

The conversation meandered from the places we had visited thus far in Japan, to the future places to visit, to where we were currently staying. We were so engrossed in our small world of travels that we didn’t realize that we had reached our destination! There seemed to be an implicit feeling that we could visit the site and take a walk in the huge memorial park together! At this point, we exchanged our identities.

Mitchell was 62 years young lady from Paris, who after 32 years of professional life decided to take 2 years sabbatical. She decided to use part of her retirement fund to travel around the world and Japan was her first destination. This was the first time she had stepped out of her country on a solo trip. She was currently staying in Hiroshima.

I shared my Hiroshima visit plan with her! We decided to spend the next hour together, roaming in the beautiful memorial park filled with freshly bloomed cherry blossoms!

As Mitchell and I walked through the site, we exchanged the ghastliness of the incident and admired in equal measure the way the city and people of Japan had bounced back and rebuilt their country. We decided to take photos of each other and together to keep as memories.

As we continued to share stories about our visit to Japan, Mitchell very fondly started sharing about her life, family, struggles, sorrows and joys. For the next hour our stories intertwined into the beautiful fabric of life, drawing similarities yet distinctiveness owing to our age, culture, language, nationality.

Her stories reflected many of her personal experience, choices she had made and her relationships with her family. What I noticed was her warm and smiling face loaded with gratitude and exuberance to live her life.

Listening to her stories created concoctions of hope, compassion, zest and clarity.

I complimented her on her courage and confidence of living her dream at that age! I wish I am too able to do so when I reach her age!

An hour and half flew in a beat and it was time for me to proceed with my hop-on-hop-off bus tour. We bid each other goodbye, although we both intrinsically wanted to spend more time together.

She decided to return to her hotel, while I went along with my plan. ?Over the years, I have thought of this beautiful incident and wondered:

-??????? Despite Mitchell and I being solo travellers, at some level, we yearned company.

-??????? We defied the usual norms of being cautious while travelling alone! It was easy for both of us to share our life stories with each other with minimum inhibition.

-??????? ?It was our ‘gut’ that made us comfortable to be in each other’s company and share our stories.

Through this incident, we met, we shared, we expressed freely, we laughed and then we moved on! Seemingly there was no apprehension or prejudice or judgement.

This incident reconfirms that: ?

1.????? We (irrespective of nationality, culture, age, background) are interdependent on human connect for emotional bandwidth without any reservations, while retaining our independent streaks of personality!

2.????? Human emotions and relationships are similar and expression of those emotions are also similar across various generations, culture, country. It is only our mindset that creates restrictions.

3.????? Affection, empathy and compassion bind us together, no matter what kind of world we come from.

4.????? It is vital to create various spheres of social and emotional connect in our lives.

5.????? Wearing a smile and gratitude are best virtues to possess

6.????? Allowing ourselves to trust our ‘gut’ can spring beautiful surprises.

In a faraway country, two independent strangers who barely had met were in this interdependent whirlpool of emotions. ?

That’s life! Today, more than ever I appreciate that interdependence and independence are meant to co-exist for the best in us to manifest!