Imposter Syndrome and How to Get Over It!

Despite not being a clinical diagnosis, imposter syndrome refers to a state of mind in which someone cannot internalize their achievements and instead feels like a fraud. They feel like they don't belong with the people around them and others can see right through them. It's also sometimes called the impostor phenomenon or the fraud syndrome.

Imposter syndrome can be an obstacle to success. Feeling like a fake or an outsider, you might be less likely to raise your hand at work or ask questions during class. You might even be less likely to apply for jobs you're qualified for because you don't feel like you belong in that position.

One way of combating imposter syndrome is to understand what it is, how it affects you, and what steps you can take to remind yourself that it's all in your head. First, let's figure out what imposter syndrome actually looks like.

Imposter syndrome might manifest in different forms in different people. Maybe you're a shy public speaker, and you feel like you have to put on a performance every time you give your work presentation. Or perhaps you're a brilliant writer who feels you're not good enough for someone to pay you to write for them.

Tell Tale Signs of Imposter Syndrome

Some signs that you might be suffering from imposter syndrome include:

? Feeling like you have to put on a "mask" (aka putting on a public face that differs from your genuine feelings) to fit in with a group.

? Feeling like you're "lucky" to have been hired by someone.

? Believing that success is just luck.

? Feeling like you're not good enough to accomplish your goals or that you're a fraud and they only like you because you're good-looking.

? Feeling stressed out and worried about rejection all the time. Have you ever caught yourself worrying about how people will find out you're not as good as you think? You might have imposter syndrome!

? Believing your worth is tied up with your relationship status (i.e., you're single and feel like you need to meet a "special someone" before you're actually "worthy").

? Feeling like you're faking it (like you never really mastered your skills or concepts).

? Believing that you'll have to "prove yourself" before you deserve success.

? Always feeling like you're on edge or about to "crash and fade." It could be an indication of imposter syndrome if you're about to fail or if your accomplishments are temporary.

? Believing that your accomplishments are somehow less worthy than other accomplishments. For example, you might feel you deserve less praise than someone else just because another person worked harder or you unconventionally achieved something.

Why Do We Suffer From Imposter Syndrome?

Contrary to popular belief, the root cause of imposter syndrome has nothing to do with being an actual imposter—it has to do with how we perceive our competence. If you feel like a fraud, it's likely because you believe you achieved your success through luck or external factors rather than your own hard work.

Imposter syndrome can arise when you find that one or more of your most essential skills aren't up to snuff compared to others around you. But it can also come from genuine accomplishments: maybe your work is so good, it feels like it must have been someone else who did all that great work—you couldn't possibly have done something that well!

Imposter syndrome doesn't always mean that you're lazy or unmotivated. Part of the reason you can't believe that you're good at something could be because you're a natural perfectionist, and you're programmed to doubt yourself. These same doubts can actually make you a better employee or a more conscientious business owner, but those of us with imposter syndrome tend to push our doubts to an extreme—this causes us to question not just our abilities but our very validity as human beings.

Another underlying reason why so many of us suffer from imposter syndrome is because of the negative messages we receive from society about how we're "supposed" to look, act, and succeed. Most of us grow up believing that it's impressive or valuable if we make a lot of money, climb the career ladder quickly, get a high degree from a prestigious university, or marry into a successful family. But some of us opt out of these traditional paths for our own reasons—because we're scared of failure, or we don't believe these paths are right for us—and we're taught to feel anything but happy about our decisions.

Because success is so often conflated with monetary value and status, the self-image we have of ourselves is often linked to these things. Because of this, we may feel like we're a failure when we can't achieve these goals or feel like we can't be truly successful unless we're a member of a privileged group that few people have access to.

Lastly, societal pressure can make us feel like we're not "good enough," especially as women, as minorities, or as women or minorities doing "men's jobs." Sometimes this feeling culture puts on us is enough to make us think we aren't good enough, but these negative messages shouldn't make us lose our confidence.

The key is to remember that you have the skills, abilities, and talents to succeed in any industry.

Remind yourself that some of your most talented colleagues might also be dealing with imposter syndrome and that accomplishments in different industries aren't necessarily related. Remind yourself that achieving success has nothing to do with how "lucky" you've been. Remind yourself that all success comes from hard work, persistence, and follow-through. Remind yourself that achieving success is a team effort!

Most importantly of all, treat your achievements like they're the validation of your merit and the recognition of your abilities—because they are! You have every right to be proud of your accomplishments, whether they're big or small.

How Can We Combat Imposter Syndrome?

Imposter syndrome can be combated in a variety of ways. Still, it often comes down to learning to accept and believe in your abilities, skills, and accomplishments rather than allowing negative self-talk to sap your confidence and cause you to feel insecure.

When this happens, try focusing on your accomplishments—for example, writing them down or saying them aloud—rather than focusing on what still needs to be done. Furthermore, you can remind yourself that you are not alone in feeling like an imposter from time to time.

Some of the other ways you can combat imposter syndrome are:

? Educate yourself. Sometimes imposter syndrome is a sign that you only need to have more knowledge. Maybe you feel you aren't good enough to get a particular degree or certification, so you avoid applying because you don't think you're qualified enough. Read up on what it takes to get what you want and learn more about the requirements before you dismiss it altogether.

? Surround yourself with positive people. The people around you can significantly impact the way you feel about yourself. Surround yourself with friends and loved ones who inspire you, and be around others who are positive and supportive—people who believe in you and always cheer you on!

? Understand that self-worth is not tied to achievements or accomplishments. Instead of looking at your achievements and acts as proof that you're worthy, try to view them as milestones—a waypoint on your way to something bigger and better.

? Share your goals. Talk about what you're working towards with people with your best interests at heart—they can be a great support and help you think through your goals and figure out a way to achieve them.

? Reflect on your life. Think about where you came from and reflect on how you've achieved your goals and the setbacks you've had along the way. This might help you realize that setbacks and failures help you gain more experience, strength, and knowledge—things that can help you accomplish your goals in the future.?

? Keep moving forward, do your thing, and be fearless!

So in closing, know that you don't have to suffer silently with imposter syndrome forever. You can learn to recognize how it's making you feel and take steps to combat it. You can also surround yourself with positive people, former colleagues, and mentors who can remind you of your accomplishments and support you on your journey!

And by the way, if you've ever thought about using a book to generate pre-qualified leads for your business, but imposter syndrome has prevented you from moving forward, reach out to me via my direct message. I'd be happy to answer any questions you may have about building the reputation and credibility your practice needs to excel!