"It is important we know who we really are, our essence, so that those stories become the main character": A Q&A with Mindset Coach Cari Hebert
ICYMI: toth shop invites some of our partners and friends to share a little bit about how business and artistry come together in their respective worlds - all in?100 words or less.?Last week, we featured thoughts from high performance mindset coach, Carianna Hebert from The Being Approach.? In her 100 words, she tackled a doozy of a phrase - 'I don't know.' It's one of those phrases that's equally comforting and challenging. How you think of it has a lot to do with your mindset - one of Cari's specialities, naturally.
Tomorrow at 7pEST, we're partnering with Cari to offer a 60 minute virtual workshop to talk mindset and marketing.
In this Q&A, we're talking to Cari about awareness, the stories we tell ourselves, and how we take action.
ts: What are some of your favorite pieces/parts of your own story??
ch: I love that I have lived many different lives within my one current life. From a very young age, I realized the power of my imagination and I love that I have been able to manifest many of the dreams that have occurred to me. Moving from a town of 700 people in New Hampshire to New York City for college, working in film in LA, landing my dream job in sports. Now getting to integrate all of my skills as a storyteller and creative to serve others in an intimate and empowering way. It really does feel like the dots line up in hindsight and I love being a work in progress.?
ts: Over the years, what have you learned or become more aware of about yourself??
ch: In my work with coaching and personal development, I have become much more aware of my vulnerability and needs in relationships. As an oldest child, a Leo, an introvert - I have always related to being a leader and very independent. I enjoy my alone time. I need moments of silence and spaciousness in a day. Partnership and letting people see my process has been a challenge for me, but something that I’m getting so much out of in my thirties. It has taught me how nurturing it is to be seen for me, not just for the parts that are easy to show off.?
ts: What are stories you hear a lot of people tell themselves??
ch: That something is wrong...whether it’s something wrong with themselves, their partners, their money, business, or the world. Our minds really love to focus on problems. Which, to be fair ,has a purpose when we need to identify a gap and create solutions. However, I hear so many people on repeat with stories of not having enough, being the only one, self judgment, worry, shame, blame and I think it’s easy to get caught in relating to the world through our fears and feelings. It is important we also know who we really are, our essence, so that those stories become the main character.
ts: How do our personal stories impact our business or career stories - or vice versa?
ch: Well, I think that because what we think influences what we believe, and what we believe drives our actions, there is really no way to escape our personal stories. They are embedded in how we show up in the world, and since we spend so much of our lives working in careers - that can always be a powerful mirror. What we want to practice is directing our attention and thinking towards the beliefs we want to embody and act on behalf of. If we are operating from an outdated fear story (I.E. that we are not worthy), we might feel unnoticed, underappreciated and like there is something to prove in our work. We have to be the ones to look at what’s going on beneath the surface and get our personal needs met so that nwe can be powerful business leaders.?
ts: If there’s one move someone can make today to move through their story or what’s blocking them, what would you tell them??
ch: Create clarity in who you want to be and what for. There has to be clarity and commitment in order to overcome persistent thoughts and habits. How do you want to show up for yourself, others, your business? Once you set the intention, the game to play is staying in integrity with that vision by aligning how you speak and how you act. Set the expectation that it’s a daily practice, not a destination.
ts: Awareness and action are a dynamo combo. What’s possible when awareness and action team up??
ch: True transformation. Integrity. Fulfillment. So much. I think as complex creatures we have such a love/hate relationship with change. We glorify it and we resist it at the same time. So many people I speak with are caught negotiating with their comfort zones - I want to change, but I am not willing to do the uncomfortable change. With just awareness, but not action, we stay the same. We don’t get the breakthrough, the growth. We have to integrate and act our way into new states of being. That to me is evolution and joy.?
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QUICK FIRE ROUND W CARI:
Learn from about 'mindset & marketing' here - and join us on Tuesday, November 2 at 7pEST. Register here.
One of the components of Cari's work that I appreciate, having done it myself, is that she partners with people to define their respective essence. Essence being - and this is the very professional, Dictionary definition - "the basic, real, and invariable nature of a thing or its significant individual feature or features." What that means: It's the core; the soul; the anchor; the center; the foundation. I think it's like the glue that holds everything - that holds you - together.
If you think essence work might be too far out there, think again - it's closer than you think. Have you paused a Netflix show recently? The 'screen saver', for lack of a better expression, when you've paused a Netflix show are screens that flash to advertise programming, of course; on each screen, there's one bold image, the show's title, and then three words to describe that respective program - those three words are, in fact, the essence words for each program. A great example? The preview for the 2017 documentary, Joan Didion: The Center Will Not Hold. The essence words? Cerebral - understated - hidden gems. YES. There are no truer words.
It's a good practice, almost a game, in language - and seeing how Netflix selects three essence words for some of their major programming.
Think fast: If there are three to five words that describe your essence, what would they be? How would you describe yourself, your work, your impact? How would you describe your core, soul, anchor, center, foundation? (It's a question that's equally challenge and comforting - much like the 'I don't know' phrase referenced earlier.)
This is a great exercise for teams, businesses, organizations, brands, and, most especially, human beings.
It's also language you can use interally as companies or businesses solidfy culture, brand identity, or hiring practices; or externally for website, social, marketing, or pitches.
Refresher: The newsletter's title is a h/t to one of my favorite lines in David Foster Wallace's This is Water. Go read it.
Certified Coach | People and Culture Business Partner | Emmy-Award Winner
3 年Can’t wait for tomorrow night!