Imperfect biscuits and our brain

Why do I always pick the broken biscuits first? Why do I ‘eliminate’ them first from the box, and only then savour the whole ones?

How about you? Do you find yourself trying to consciously or unconsciously “fix” imperfections in your life and your physical surroundings?

Why does our brain dislike imperfections, and how does that reflect in our human behaviour?

The human brain's tendency to dislike imperfections can be attributed to various factors, including evolutionary and cognitive processes. Here are a few key reasons why imperfections can evoke negative responses and how they reflect in human behaviour:

Survival Instinct: From an evolutionary standpoint, our brain has evolved to seek out patterns, order, and efficiency. This trait helps us navigate the world and make quick decisions for survival.

Imperfections can signal potential threats or inefficiencies, triggering discomfort or aversion. For example, a decaying or discoloured food item might be perceived as potentially harmful, leading to an instinctive rejection response.

Cognitive Bias: Humans are prone to cognitive biases, which are systematic errors in thinking. One such bias is the "negativity bias", where negative events and information have a stronger impact on our cognition and emotions compared to positive ones. Imperfections often fall into the negative category, and as a result, they tend to capture our attention more readily, influencing our behaviour and judgments.

Aesthetic Preferences: Humans also possess a sense of aesthetics, appreciating symmetry, balance, and harmony. Imperfections can disrupt these preferred patterns and trigger a sense of unease or dissatisfaction. This preference for aesthetic perfection is observed in various domains, such as art, architecture, and design, where symmetry and smoothness are often valued. And, apparently, in biscuit boxes, too.

Social Comparison: Human behaviour is influenced by social factors, including the desire for acceptance and belonging. In social contexts, imperfections can lead to social comparison, where individuals assess themselves in relation to others. Perceived imperfections may generate feelings of inferiority or self-consciousness, influencing behaviour to seek conformity or improvement.

Perfectionism: Some individuals have a higher tendency towards perfectionism, which is characterized by setting unrealistically high standards and striving for flawlessness. The aversion to imperfections can be particularly pronounced in such individuals, affecting their behaviour in areas like work, relationships, and self-image. This drive for perfection can lead to increased stress, self-criticism, and a reluctance to take risks.

In human behaviour, the dislike for imperfections can manifest in various ways. For instance:

Product Choices: Consumers often gravitate towards products that appear flawless or aesthetically pleasing, preferring items without visible imperfections.

Social Interactions: People may be more drawn to individuals who present themselves as flawless or put together, while displaying imperfections might lead to judgments or negative perceptions.

Decision-Making: Imperfections can bias our judgments and decisions, leading to a preference for options perceived as flawless, even if other factors are more important.

It's important to note that while the brain's aversion to imperfections is a common phenomenon, individual responses may vary. Cultural and personal factors also shape how imperfections are perceived and valued.

Can we or should we do something about this tendency, and if so, what would be some practical tips to overcome this tendency, if at all, or when it starts to be exaggerated or disturbing to us or to those around us?

Recognizing and addressing the tendency to dislike imperfections can be beneficial for personal well-being and relationships. Here are some practical tips to help overcome or manage this tendency when it becomes exaggerated or disturbing:

Awareness and Mindfulness: Start by becoming aware of your own reactions to imperfections. Mindfulness practices can help you observe your thoughts, emotions, and judgments without immediately reacting to them. This awareness can create a space for more conscious responses instead of automatic aversion.

Challenge Perfectionist Thinking: If you tend towards perfectionism, challenge your beliefs and expectations around perfection. Recognize that perfection is often unattainable and that imperfections are a natural part of life. Reframe imperfections as opportunities for growth, learning, and acceptance. A few good coaching sessions can help in calibrating these perceptions and creating a more realistic vision of things and calibrating our expectations accordingly.

Embrace Imperfections: Cultivate a mindset of embracing imperfections in yourself and others. Recognize that imperfections make us unique and human. Practice self-compassion and extend compassion towards others, acknowledging that nobody is perfect. Many of us find it very hard to be compassionate towards ourselves, and are not at all aware of this.

Practice Gratitude: Shift your focus towards gratitude for what is positive and valuable in your life, rather than fixating on imperfections. Gratitude can help reframe your perspective and cultivate a more positive outlook.

Seek Balanced Perfection: Strive for excellence rather than perfection. Set realistic and achievable goals, focusing on progress rather than flawlessness. Understand that imperfections can be stepping stones to growth and improvement.

Challenge Social Comparison: Recognize that comparing yourself to others based on perceived flaws or imperfections is unproductive and can lead to unhappiness. Instead, focus on your own personal growth and development. You might find more happiness that way.

Develop Resilience: Build resilience by learning to adapt and bounce back from setbacks or imperfections. Develop coping strategies and a growth mindset that allows you to see challenges as opportunities for learning and personal development.

Seek Support: If your aversion to imperfections significantly impacts your well-being or relationships, consider seeking support from a coach, therapist or counsellor. They can provide guidance and tools to help you navigate and manage these tendencies effectively.

Remember, overcoming the tendency to dislike imperfections is a gradual process that requires self-reflection, practice, and patience. Be kind to yourself as you work towards a healthier and more balanced perspective.