Immature Relationship…..during social distancing…..part 30
Emotional immaturity can reflect a lack of depth and understanding about one’s own emotions, inability to communicate and process things related to the relationship, as well as lack of empathy and ability to understand your partner’s emotional experiences.
Love is easy. It's the easiest thing you've ever done. It is the calmest space in your life, it is the blanket that you cover and makes you feel the most secure. It's something that happens naturally, you don't have to fight day and night for it.
When you love someone and he/she loves you, there is not even a trace of doubt regarding his / her feelings for you, this is called peace of mind. A peace of mind that you never had before, that kind of peace that makes you humble and revives you.
A mature relationship lives in the peace of mind, while the immature relationship drowns in it.
Immature relationships ask questions, they are based solely on doubts.
"Does he love me?",
"Am I unfaithful?”,
"Will we be together in two months?"
Mature couples do not need to ask questions.
Partners already know these answers and do not need reinsurance. They are comfortable with each other and are confident in them, they are free, but together they do not put barriers on each other.
Immature relationships always leave traces of "something better". Mature relationships give you what you want.
In immature relationships, there is always a "void", an absence and the feeling that "something is missing". This feeling always appears in your thoughts when you go to sleep, or when you are not with your non-stop partner. It diminishes when you are together, but never completely disappears.
In immature relationships, partners struggle to become a whole. In the mature ones, the partners know that it is OK to have their own identity.
Immature relationships consist of two incomplete persons, two halves struggling to form a whole. Two people who are constantly searching for "something" that unfortunately cannot be found in another person.
They dominate each other and are forced to complement each other, although in most cases this leads to suffocation, boredom and destruction of the relationship.
In mature couples, the partners do not fusion with each other. There are two individual beings who simply make a beautiful couple. They are not in this relationship to "rediscover" nor to find in the other something that they lack.
They are in this relationship to share the same passions, desires and interests with a person who respects and accepts them as they are.
An immature relationship: You think love is when you see the other person as perfect. An immature relationship:
You think you understand each other so well you can almost read each other's minds. You think you’ll always agree on everything and you’ll never fight (but when you eventually do, it gets so nasty it possibly ruins everything).
An immature relationship: You focus on passion, sometimes without even truly knowing your partner. You’re very eager to publicly display affection - that’s your main way of establishing connection.
Disclaimer: The information on this POST is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional advice. The opinions expressed within this article are the personal opinions of the author. All content, including text, graphics, images and information, contained on or available through this article is for general information purposes / educational purposes only, and to ensure discussion or debate.
Thank you …. Stressful, and a total pain in the ass.
Every few days she would come up with a drama just so I would shower more attention on her and so she would feel validated and loved as a person.
She doesn't understand boundaries. She pressured me to have sex every now and then. It wasn't pleasant, especially when I literally have to fight her off me at least twice I was obviously unimpressed and not turned on. I've told her multiple times I'm not ready blahblahblah but it went in from one of her ears and went out from the other.
She seems to believe that I can't be loving her for real if I don't desire her, and that if I love her I would want to have sex with her.
So yep, every now and then she questioned my love and fidelity.
Mature Relationships
You see the other person's imperfections. Some of them might even annoy you. But you know there are more important things to that person that make you want to be with them.
Loyalty comes first
Truth always speaks and no manipulations
Your are forgiven for your mistakes but do not repeat them
Good amount of planning, financially stability, short term and long term goals are thought through
Both of them put efforts when its tough to adjust the differences
They are not perfect but they don’t give up.
The thing is, it’s not definite that your relationship with person A will always be immature and you have to meet person B to have a mature relationship.
It all depends on the potential that you and person A have as a couple.
Are you both able and willing to learn healthy communication patterns?
Can you both try giving up your codependence?
Do you have enough in common apart from emotions?
Et cetera.
If the potential is there, your relationship with person A can get past the immature phase and grow into a mature relationship. If it’s not there or if one of you is not willing to work on it, it might be time to move on - or think about how you act in the relationship.
Want to add word or two?
Mature couples don’t fall in love”, they step into it. Love isn’t something you fall for.
Falling denotes lowering oneself, dropping down and being stuck somewhere lower than where you started. You have to get up from falling.
Love isn’t like that - at least not with people who are doing it right. Immature couples fall; Mature couples coast, cause love is either a passing game, or it’s forever. Love is either wrong, or it’s right. A couple is either mature or immature.
Your comment ….?
First it should be easy, from the beginning to end. There are no passionate fights with passionate make-up sex. There’s no obsessive calling, texting or worrying.
There is no real drama cause drama is for kids.
Drama is for people who don’t know how to have relationship— Who live by idealistic, love must be wild and obsessive.
Love is easy.
It’s the easiest thing you’ve ever done.
It’s the calmest place in your life, the safest blanket you’ve ever worn.
It’s something that happens naturally;
It’s doesn’t need to be fought for day in and day out.
When we love someone & he or she loves you & there’s no doubt to yours, that’s peace of mind. A peace of mind you’ve never had before. The kind that humbles and revives you.
A mature relationship lives by this peace of mind; immature ones drown in it.
Immature relationships are all about doubts.
Does he love me?
Is she cheating on me?
Will we be together in two months?
Mature couples don’t need to ask questions.
They already know the answers & they don’t need reassurance from their partners. They are comfortable & secure & free of doubts cause mature love isn’t about all those small questions, but a comfort in knowing the big one is answered.
There are always going to be people in your life, pasts to each person & surprises behind closed doors.
Mature couples, however, do not feel threatened by strangers & past lovers. They are confident in their love & their partner’s love.
We all have a past, in many cases, one we’re not proud of. We can’t help what happened to people before we knew them. All that matters is how they are now. Immature couples, however, refuse to see beyond the past.
Mature couples don’t just accept one another pasts but want to help heal the wounds. They look beyond the mistakes & the flaws towards the beauty in the future together.
There’s a voids in immature relationships, an apparent absence & worry that something’s missing. It eats away you when you go to sleep or leave each other for just a few hours. It burns dimply when you’re together, but you wave it off with sex & constant chatter.
Mature relationship have no void. There are no empty spaces or tiny cracks. There is never a feeling that something has been taken away or is leaving with the other person.