I’m Doing This, How About You?

Psychology means ‘mind’.

When you use psychology, it means you get to the horse’s mind, not just his body. You want him to be an active participant — engaged and putting in effort as opposed to an obedient, vacuous puppet. You want the horse to think and be smart, not mindless and stupid, and when you lead the dance the horse has to pay close attention and tune in with you.

The only way to create this is for you to… LEAD, but with the intention to develop SYNERGY.

It’s as the lyrics say in that wonderful Carole King song –

Where you Lead, I will follow, Anywhere that you tell me to…

And at the end, it changes to;?“I’m gonna follow where you lead.”

To me, harmony is the ultimate demonstration of trust. The horse, your follower, has to totally trust you. That’s when it is beautiful, magical, and effortless. This Harmony Module brings together all the skills you’ve learned from Modules 1–6 to learn how to be your horse’s teacher and develop a positive relationship. Here, in Module 7 you get to bring it all together. This is less about skills and technique and more about TRUST.

I do my research mostly outside of the horse industry. I look for examples of excellence in relatable fields and in this case, the most obvious is dancing. Especially ballroom dancing. I found so many parallels to the horse and human collaboration here, mainly because ballroom dancing involves close contact (although we sit on the horse’s back) and the responsibilities of the leader are the same.

“Leading” requires more skill, more thought, and more attention than following! It sounds easy to say?‘do in your body what you want your horse to do in its body’?but that means you have to be 100% focused on… your balance, your energy, flow, your body position, and movement.

I also found interesting comments such as these — which you can also relate to riding, good and bad:

“Men get pleasure from dancing well, not simply from dancing. A partner dance is an opportunity for a man to be masculine and give a woman a good time. This is surely a good thing for both men and women. If a man is stupid, he might try to show the woman how strong he is by shoving her around brutally.”

“In Ballroom: The man is strong and powerful.?He decides what steps the couple will take at what time, dictating direction and timing.?The woman responds to the man and does whatever he leads, and her job is to be beautiful and expressive.”

“Leadership:?So, for dancing, you will need a partner, and that partner will be waiting for the leader (that’s you!)?to lead the whole experience.?It’s on the leader to decide when to turn and when to try a different step, and at the same time, he needs to find a pleasant way to let his partner know what’s happening too.

I especially liked this one because I grew up watching the legendary Fred Astaire dancing in Hollywood films.

The way I translate this into my training is to think about it this way:?I’m doing this, what about you?

As you know, your horse will do in its body what you do in your body — the great, the good, the bad, and the ugly! Here is a little truth serum for your veins that might motivate you even more strongly toward your goals for good riding:

• I’m unbalanced how about you?
• I’m on the forehand, how about you?
• I’m crooked, how about you?
• I’m leaning to the right, how about you?
• I’m rushing, how about you?
• I’m lacking energy, how about you?
• I’m tense, how about you?
• My arms are tight, how about yours?
• My back is hollow, how about yours?
• I don’t know what to do, how about you?

OK OK! Enough torture… I think you get it. Before you blame the horse, consider what you might be doing that affects your horse’s ability to be softer, rounder, straighter, more comfortable and with you.

Linda