The Illusion of Perfectiontion, Validation and the Reality of Neurodiversity

Self-awareness is more than just knowing yourself. It’s about understanding where you stand in a world that often asks you to be something you’re not. We live in a society that thrives on perfection, but here’s a hard truth: no one is perfect. And when you chase the idea of being perfect, you lose sight of who you truly are. That’s the first mistake we make. The second mistake? Looking for validation.

Whether it’s in the workplace, in relationships, or on social media, too many of us are searching for someone else’s approval. But here’s the thing: validation doesn’t make you whole. We often look for external affirmation, thinking that if enough people like us, we’ll feel better about ourselves. But even in a world where likes and comments are the currency of self-worth, we’re missing the point. It’s the companies, relationships, and platforms that recognize you for who you truly are that matter. Not for what they can take from you, but for what they see in you.

The Illusion of Social Media Connection        

In today’s digital world, social media has become a battleground for attention and approval. For big brands, it’s all about selling you something, convincing you that you need their product, their life, their lifestyle. It’s a relentless cycle of marketing, likes, comments and superficial engagement, but when you step back and really think about it - what’s the point?

We’ve become so obsessed with numbers, with followers, with the constant need for external affirmation, that we’ve forgotten what it means to actually connect. Social media is not a space for authentic interaction—it’s a stage for validation-seeking. People are more concerned with the approval of others than in truly expressing who they are. The irony? The more you try to be “liked,” the less likely you are to truly be seen.

As Mel Robbins wisely says, “Keep your privacy away from people’s standards.” The less you share, the less control others have over you. Stop living for others’ expectations—especially when their admiration is rooted in false assumptions. When you make yourself vulnerable, remember that not everyone who follows you is genuinely interested in you. Many are simply there for their own benefit.

The Silent Loneliness of the Neurotypical        

It’s easy to believe that loneliness only affects those who are neurodivergent or different. But the truth is neurotypical people are lonely too. We’ve all been taught to keep up appearances, to put on a mask and act like everything is fine, but this only isolates us further. The pandemic amplified this isolation, but now that we’re supposed to be emerging from the shadows, people are still retreating into their own corners of silence.

Neurodivergent people, on the other hand are often far more creative and expressive. But they’re also the ones who are less visible in a society that expects conformity. Creativity, especially when it doesn’t align with the status quo, becomes a threat - something to be shut down, ignored or bullied into submission. Why? Because we fear what’s different. We’re scared of things we don’t understand and so we reject them. This behaviour doesn’t just happen in the workplace or in relationships - it’s pervasive and it’s destroying us. People with different experiences, backgrounds and perspectives don’t need to fit into your criteria. They need to be recognized for the unique value they bring.

Neurodiversity and the Need for Real Inclusion        

Neurodiversity is not just a concept; it’s a movement. We are not anomalies. We are people who think differently, see the world differently, and contribute in ways that don’t always fit into a narrow, traditional mold. And yet, time and time again, I see neurodivergent people being silenced—dismissed, pushed out, or bullied by teams and organizations that don’t know how to embrace what’s different.

As Ellie Middleton states in How To Be You, “Don’t be afraid to fail. Don’t be afraid to ask for advice.” This resonates deeply because it speaks to the strength that comes from embracing imperfection. It’s okay not to have everything figured out, and it’s okay to ask for help. We don’t have to perform to meet other people’s standards. We need to stop pretending that only one way of thinking, one way of being, one way of interacting is acceptable.

We’re all capable of contributing in meaningful ways, but we can’t do it if we’re constantly trying to conform to a version of ourselves that doesn’t feel authentic. When we reject others because they don’t fit into our box, we’re not just limiting their potential—we’re limiting our own.

The Noise We Need to Hear        

So, I say this with conviction: Great article—that’s why I want to be deafening. (adj.) Extremely loud; overwhelming noise - the world doesn’t need more silence. It needs voices that rise above the noise of ignorance, of conformity, of judgment. We need to hear the voices of those who are marginalized, those who are silenced because they don’t fit the mold. This is not just about standing up for the neurodivergent community—it’s about standing up for everyone who has ever been made to feel like they don’t belong. The world doesn’t need more judgment; it needs more understanding. It doesn’t need more followers; it needs more creators. The truth is, when we start to truly listen—when we start to see the world from others’ perspectives—only then will we begin to understand what it means to truly connect. We need to stop living for likes, stop relying on the validation of strangers, and start embracing the differences that make us who we are.

So, I ask you: Where are you running today? Are you still chasing approval? Or are you standing firm in your own truth, embracing the discomfort of being different, and refusing to conform to a world that tries to silence you?

The choice is yours. ????