I'll Work Until I'm Turned into Ash: What I've Discovered During My Layoff

Hi there! ??

This is my first ever LinkedIn article and honestly, the first time I’ve decided to try writing something long-form. My name is Liliya Elogullari, and I’ve worked as a Digital Marketing professional specializing in paid search and paid social campaigns for B2B companies for over 8 years.

In November 2024, I was laid off. Like many others in this situation, I’ve found myself navigating a rollercoaster of emotions and experiences that I’m sure some of you can relate to.

Here are the five stages I believe many of us go through after being laid off:

1. Total mental breakdown: Sadness, anger, resentment, happiness, panic, and sometimes even burnout (no not the ones you see at sideshows), all at once.
2. Finance check: “How much money do I have, and how long can I afford to be unemployed? What subscription can I get rid of?" I hope you’ve been able to save up, it’s not easy.
3. Applying, interviewing, and rejection: The place where dreams are shattered and confidence is constantly tested.
4. Rethinking the career choice: “Should I completely change my career? Or try something new altogether?”
5. Trying to find balance: Spending time with family and friends, reconnecting with old colleagues, picking up a hobby or two, and taking intentional breaks from the job search.

For me? I’m currently experiencing all five at once.

I decided to write this post because I’ve come to a big realization during this time: I will work until I’m turned into ash.?

I’m not the type of person who can “chill” or enjoy life at a steady pace. I love working. I’ve been employed since the age of 13, and I thrive on staying busy, completing projects, and finding the momentum to keep going. Being unemployed, honestly, feels like torture for my mind (and no torture training methods can save me).

What I miss the most about working:

• Early morning meetings (yes, even the ones that could’ve been an email).
• Collaborating with brilliant, experienced professionals who motivate me to keep learning and asking questions.
• A little bit of workplace drama (what's the tea today?) or misalignment ("Wait your goal is different from my goal?" or dun dun dun .... "headwinds").
• Those last-minute, frustrating tasks, that bring pride and relief once completed.
• Stressing about work, even outside of work.
• That growth and the pride that comes with accomplishing meaningful goals.
• Being in an office with freebies (snacks galore, internet, toilet paper, that ping pong table that I’ll never use, etc.)

I don’t see myself ever retiring, not because I can’t, but because I don’t want to. I picture myself in my late 80s or beyond, maybe working in a small local retail shop or teaching random crafts (I’m a serial hobbyist) to people.

This time off, however, has taught me a lot. I’ve realized just how important it is to give yourself grace (I'm not good at that: grace). It’s easy to feel like you’re failing (especially since you are asked “How’s your job search?”, “Did you find a job yet?”, etc.) when you’re not working, but this phase is part of life. It’s not a reflection of your worth, skillset, or potential.

I’ve also learned the value of leaning into my network. Reaching out to former colleagues, mentors, and friends for advice or even just a listening ear has been invaluable. Sometimes, taking a step back gives you the space to reflect and assess what you truly want in your next role. It’s not just about finding any job, it’s about finding the right one.

If you’re in a similar situation, here’s what’s been helpful for me so far:

1. Set small daily goals: Whether it’s applying to two jobs, updating your LinkedIn, or practicing interview questions (ChatGPT is my best friend here), these small wins add up.?
2. Take intentional breaks: It’s okay to pause. Whether it’s taking a walk, spending time with loved ones, or diving into a hobby, breaks help recharge your energy and mindset.
3. Reframe rejection: It’s not personal, it’s a numbers game. Each rejection is one step closer to the opportunity that’s right for you. (I sometimes flip the bird at my laptop screen when I get a rejection email - don't judge me... it helps).
4. Network, Network, Network: Reach out to people in your field, comment on posts, join groups, and engage in meaningful conversations. Opportunities often come from unexpected places.

Right now, I’m focusing on a few things:

• Continuing to apply and interview for roles in digital marketing, specifically in paid media, growth marketing, and performance marketing.
• Learning and brushing up on new skills, like analytics (SQL and Python), campaign optimization, and even tools I’ve never had the chance to explore deeply (programmatic advertising and affiliate marketing).
• Staying connected to my peers on LinkedIn by sharing my journey and offering help where I can.

I know I’m not alone in this, and I’d love to hear from others who’ve been in a similar spot. What lessons have you taken away from periods of unemployment or career transitions? What advice would you give to someone navigating this experience? Do you plan to work post the “retirement age” of your country or state?

Let’s start a conversation, please share your thoughts or lessons in the comments.

Lils out. ??