I'll Do It Myself: The Challenges of Patience in Leadership

Leadership is often a paradox. On one hand, great leaders are problem solvers, people who step up to challenges and get things done. On the other, they are enablers—mentors who must guide others, even if it means stepping back and watching their team struggle. For many managers, the hardest part of leadership is resisting the temptation to take matters into their own hands. The phrase "I'll do it myself" might feel like the quickest route to success, but it can be one of the most damaging habits a leader can develop.

The Challenge of Patience

Patience is an essential yet elusive quality in leadership. Managers who have spent years honing their expertise can find it difficult to watch others make mistakes. The natural instinct is to intervene, to take over a task that is being fumbled, and to ensure everything runs smoothly. However, in doing so, leaders rob their teams of the chance to learn and grow.

It’s important to remember that every leader was once a learner. Those who managed and mentored us accepted our weaknesses and failures as part of our development. Just as they showed patience with us, we must now extend that same patience to those we lead. However, one of the biggest hurdles for new and even experienced managers is the struggle with patience. It's often faster and seemingly more efficient to simply take over a task, especially when deadlines loom or the perceived quality of work doesn't meet immediate expectations. This "I'll do it myself" mentality stems from several factors:

• Perfectionism: A desire for flawless execution can lead managers to micromanage and take over tasks to ensure they meet their own standards.??
• Time constraints: The pressure of deadlines can make it seem more expedient to handle tasks personally rather than investing time in training or guidance.
• Lack of trust: Some managers struggle to delegate effectively due to a lack of trust in their team's abilities.??
• Habit: Old habits die hard. If a manager was previously responsible for a specific task, it can be difficult to relinquish control.

The Need to Empower Others

Effective leadership isn’t about doing the work—it’s about empowering others to do it. Delegation is more than just offloading tasks; it’s an act of trust. By resisting the urge to take over, leaders send a powerful message: "I trust you to handle this." This trust fosters confidence, competence, and eventually, independence among team members.

Empowering others also means allowing them to fail. Failure, while uncomfortable, is often the most effective teacher. When leaders step back and let their teams navigate challenges, they create an environment where problem-solving, critical thinking, and resilience can flourish. By resisting the urge to constantly intervene, managers create opportunities for their team members to:

• Develop new skills: Delegating tasks allows individuals to expand their skillset and gain valuable experience.??
• Build confidence: Successfully completing challenging assignments boosts self-esteem and fosters a sense of ownership.??
• Increase job satisfaction: Employees feel more engaged and motivated when they are given autonomy and responsibility.
• Improve efficiency: By distributing workload effectively, managers can free up their own time to focus on strategic initiatives.

Resisting the Temptation to Do More

One of the most common leadership pitfalls is leading by example to an extreme. While it’s important for leaders to set the tone for hard work, there’s a danger in doing too much. If a leader is constantly stepping in to fix problems, it creates an unbalanced dynamic where employees expect to be rescued rather than developing their own solutions.

Instead, leaders should be conscious of their actions versus their words. Saying "You handle it" means little if a manager later swoops in and takes over. Trusting the team means stepping back completely—even when it’s difficult to watch. The best leaders are not those who do everything themselves, but those who create an ecosystem where others can succeed. Even when things aren't going exactly as planned, managers must resist the urge to take over. Instead, they should:

• Provide clear instructions and expectations: Ensure that team members understand the task and the desired outcome.
• Offer support and resources: Provide the necessary tools and guidance to help individuals succeed.
• Check in regularly but avoid micromanaging: Monitor progress without constantly hovering.
• Be patient: Allow individuals the time and space to learn and grow.

The Risk and Reward of Letting Go

There is always a risk in stepping back. Mistakes may happen. Just as we, as leaders, learned from our own failures during our career progression, we must allow our team members the same opportunity. Failure, when handled constructively, can be a powerful learning experience. Deadlines may be missed. Clients may be dissatisfied. However, the long-term benefits far outweigh the short-term frustrations. Employees who are given the freedom to fail and learn will eventually become self-sufficient, competent, and confident contributors.

Moreover, allowing others to take ownership fosters accountability. When employees know that they are truly responsible for a task, they are more likely to take it seriously and develop a sense of pride in their work. This autonomy is the foundation of a strong, high-performing team.

The Long-Term Rewards

The short-term discomfort of watching someone struggle can be difficult, but the long-term rewards of empowerment are significant. By investing time and patience in developing their team, managers create a more skilled, motivated, and engaged workforce.

In leadership, the greatest contribution is not in the work a leader does but in the people they develop. By stepping back, showing patience, and empowering others, leaders create a legacy of capable, confident professionals who will carry those lessons forward.

"I'll do it myself" may feel like the path of least resistance, but it is often the road to ineffective leadership. True leadership lies in patience, empowerment, and the willingness to let others struggle and grow. By embracing patience, empowering others, accepting failure as a learning opportunity, and resisting the urge to constantly intervene, managers can create a more dynamic, innovative, and successful team. The journey of developing others is fraught with challenges, but it is also one of the most rewarding aspects of management.

In the end, the best leaders are those who recognise that their success is not measured by what they accomplish alone, but by what they inspire and enable others to achieve.

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Mark Geraghty

Partner

Executive Recruit

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