"Identifying Influencers in Your Life" - An Exercise

by Donna Check

Day in and day out every year, there are influencers in our lives. We are living our own history which we’ll reflect on and recall people with whom we interacted personally and professionally. Do we remember with a smile? Did we learn or benefit in some way that helped us develop? Or, in the alternative, maybe we wish we didn’t remember.

What are the differences and did those individuals influence us in the many roles of our lives?

An exercise I believe is helpful in “regrouping,” so to speak, is to take some time to reflect and…

• make a list of the individuals you most admire for positively impacting your life and your interactions with others, and identify the actions or words which places those admired individuals on this list;
• make a list of the individuals who impacted your life through actions or words you did not like, did not respect, and/or did not want to demonstrate when interacting with others, and identify the actions or words which places those individuals on this list.

What you will find reviewing your two lists is the positive impact ALL the individuals have had on your life, no matter the experience. We learn and benefit as do those with whom we interact NOW based on what was surely positive and what appeared to be negative experiences in the past.

It’s important to remember actions and words that helped us develop and recall the positive feelings we still have from those experiences. We want to share with others. However, just as important is recognizing we can choose every day NOT to emulate those who chose a different way of interacting. We know there is an alternative. Respect. Kindness. Sharing. Giving. Empathy. Professionalism. Manners. Integrity. Mentoring. Charity. Forgiveness.... not necessarily in that order but all of those are key.