I Thought I Knew Vulnerability until I became a CEO...

Vulnerability is a hot topic right now, with leading voices like Carl Shawn Watkins sharing research-driven reasons to let down your guard at work and make space for real understanding and empathy. It’s an easy concept to buy into. Wouldn’t we all like to live in a world where people were honest about their insecurities and needs, rather than projecting overconfidence and aggression, especially in business?

Throughout my career, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about how to approach my work with vulnerability. I have used storytelling, building relationships and practiced active listening, all to try to improve my vulnerability presence in relating to my team. I take my relationships seriously, and I’ve seen the results of my efforts reap many dividends.

But, after becoming CEO of my company, Carl Shawn Watkins Consulting, I discovered that?leading?with vulnerability is much more complicated than it seems—and it takes more than a few TED talks to get it right. Here’s what I’ve learned:

To navigate so much uncertainty and ambiguity, leaders need to be confident; but too much self-confidence can narrow their peripheral vision. As counterintuitive as it may seem, vulnerability is actually a leadership strength for leaders when we know that tomorrow’s answers won’t be found in the corner office today.

Humility is the secret to staying aware, alert and nimble. It speaks in powerful phrases:? "I’ve never thought of that. Tell me more. Who knows more about this?" For that to happen, leaders must understand what people are feeling and facing...leaders must be self-aware.

Leader’s lessons

What I’ve found in the last two years is that you can’t build a work culture based on?your experiences?alone. You have to meet people on their level and adapt. Although many people think of vulnerability as a weakness, I use the word strategically and intentionally to evoke a deeper connotation.

Vulnerability is a way to show that you’re emotionally available through your communication. This availability means you’re able to understand and empathize with the experiences and needs of those around you.

That decision to be vulnerable is without question the toughest, yet most liberating decision an executive will ever make, whenever it happens in the career trajectory. It’s about admitting that while you are good, you’re not as good as you could be.

Internalizing and coming to grips with this powerful realization, and then having the courage to share this with peers, employees, and leaders is a breakthrough experience precisely because it frees you up to focus on two critical levers for improvement: strengthening your talents and addressing your leadership deficits.

The effective CEO coach in me will help the executive make the decision to be vulnerable and guide them through sharing that decision with their world. Just think of the power that is unleashed when a senior executive says to the board, the executive team, employees, and co-workers...

1. I know I’m good, but I also know I can be better.
2. I need your honest feedback on what you regard as my leadership strengths and talents as well as areas where there is room for me to improve.
3. I realize I cannot become the most effective leader without you and your ongoing, honest feedback.
4. I will learn to understand and accept my gifts and talents and also learn how to best use them in support of your goals, my goals, and our organizational goals.

You may be surprised to know that in my coaching journey, I have discovered a real problem many executives have with how they embrace and accept their vulnerability. They see nothing positive about deflecting feedback and accolades. Rather, the vulnerable leader will learn how to leverage, strengthen, and polish that feedback and those accolades to serve them well. It takes courage and willingness to accept both strengths and weaknesses, and to work on both are necessary for leaders to fulfill their potential.

I invite and encourage you to?learn more about our leadership coaching options?and the positive results you can expect. As CEOs we are not saviors, we must think about the impact we have on the organization, our co-workers, and in a wider view society. As we move into a digitally transformed post-pandemic world, it’s crucial that your company’s culture and values are exemplified by its leadership and built into every facet of the business.

Many of today’s companies have open-work spaces and open-door policies, but?what good is that?when we are closed off from others or even ourselves? People who never face their fears are unable to move through them. They can’t ask for help because they are being dishonest with themselves. When we create cultures that value vulnerability and authenticity, we remove fear from the equation. People will ask for help, and give you the opportunity to guide them through the challenges towards their greatest contributions.

That is the power of vulnerability. Partner with me and let's begin the journey!

The Vulnerability Toolkit newsletter is a weekly LinkedIn newsletter designed to stimulate critical and relevant dialogue that centers around topics of Vulnerability in Leadership and the DEI structure that Leadership can cultivate.?This newsletter is curated by Carl Shawn Watkins, CEO Carl Shawn Watkins Consulting who is a writer, educator, coach, speaker, and culture consultant.?Carl Shawn is the host of the Vulnerability Matters podcast, where he explores diversity, equity and inclusion with the emphasis on vulnerable leadership in more detail.?