I strongly recommend that you read "Educated" by Tara Westover

Tara stands in the abandoned red railway car and looks up at the dark form of the Indian Princess. When she describes the wind that whips her hair across her face, you too feel the chill of the cold air on your neck. I knew I was holding a wonderfully written book in my hands.

What is Educated all about?

This is one of the best memoirs I have read in a while - the story of a young girl brought up in a survivalist family in rural Idaho. She survived an upbringing by a father who most possibly suffered from severe mental illness including bipolar disorder and some form of schizophrenia. Her mother was complacent to her husband's wishes for the most part and one of Tara's brothers was abusive. To say that this is a story of how she was set free by education would be reductionsim - it is also about pain, anguish, and triumph. But most importantly it raises the question:

How much do we allow to be molded by our parents and their belief system?

Before I delve a little more into why I loved this memoir, let me speak of a brilliant movie called "The Great Indian Kitchen" released in 2021.

A movie about the typical Indian male entitlement, this movie is the story of many Indian women whose existence becomes that of a glorified housekeeper once she is married - and the woman is expected to revere that as a sacred privilege.

And as with any movie that speaks of uncomfortable truths, my social media groups resonated with discussions about the movie.

A statement made by a male colleague stayed with me - “This used to happen in the past. Not anymore. It is just an exaggerated view in these times.”

I was amazed for two reasons :

(a) My friend is a nice guy, no doubt, but he is so clouded by the privileges accorded to him in patriarchy that he does not even stop to consider for a second that this could be true for the women in his life (to varying degrees).

(b) Living in some part of the western world, he has perhaps discounted that there are people who are very different from the ones he sees and interacts with when he makes the annual visit to India.

Why segue from a Memoir to a Malayalam movie??

Growing up in a developing nation with relatives who have never traveled outside our home state, I have noticed a bias that they carry - if you were living in the middle east or anywhere in the West, then you have arrived in life. How come? Because no one is poor in America, right?

Well, I did not realize that I too had formed opinions about "stuff that I didn't really know".

This book was a fantastical eye-opener for me.

While intellectually I am aware that racism and other prejudices affect the western mind as it does any human in the world, I had no notion of what it meant to be a Mormon, let alone a survivalist. If you asked me what a radical survivalist was, I am sure my mind would have unwittingly referenced crime thrillers ad conspiracy theorists - and I feel so ashamed for this.

To put this into perspective, when I started reading "Educated" I thought I was reading a story set in the 50s. Some references in the book made me question this and I looked up Westover - imagine my shock when I realized that the author is only a decade younger than me!

How did she learn to write so well?

Tara did not receive any form of formal schooling till she was 17. The homeschooling she received consisted mostly of herbalism and how to help her father in a family-owned junkyard. While her parents allowed them to study for themselves, Tara's education started perhaps as an imitation of her brother Tyler.

The books available to her were the Old and New Testament and the Book of Mormon. How many teens do we know who would sit through stiff, long-winded texts? Reading these obscure philosophical texts and essays prepared her in ways she could not have foreseen. In her own words,

The skill I was learning was a crucial one - the patience to read things I could not yet understand

Tara Westover

Why should you read this book?

I agree that we cannot possibly know everything in the world. But wherever possible, if we can understand a little more about the people who inhabit this planet, I believe we should do so. There might be a story in there or perhaps even a line that will help us open our minds a little wider.

This is not a book of Mormonism. It is the story of a young girl whose life is so radically different from yours & mine.

I found the book to be fair and kind. When she realizes that the indoctrination from her father may not come from a sound mind, she cannot just break away - she struggles greatly out of love and loyalty.

Her ability to think deeply and write with rare insights caught the attention of her professors which led to opportunities to read at Cambridge and Harvard university - and Thank God she realized that her redemption was through education.

But none of this is easy.

She wants to forgive her tormentor - her brother Shawn (one among the 7 siblings). When she gathers the courage to call out the bullying and abusive behavior of her brother, she does so knowing that her family (most importantly her mother) will not take her side.

For me, this is the story of courage and the transformative power of education. And she has such a beautiful way with words!

If you have already read the book, I would love to hear your thoughts on the book.