I Saved Someone's Life This Morning

I saved someone's life this morning at breakfast. Really. I was enjoying my scrambled eggs and coffee at a café' here in Brooklyn when I heard someone coughing, coughing, coughing. No, that wasn't coughing, that was CHOKING.

I looked across the room and saw a woman at the bar standing up but doubled over. I called out to the guy sitting next to her, "Is she okay? Does she need help?"

He just gave me a deer-in-headlights look.

I got up, went over, put my hand on her back and asked, "Are you choking?" She couldn't speak but was able to nod.

Out of some deep memory of my training as a lifeguard 40+ years ago, I instinctively did the Heimlich maneuver. I wrapped my arms around her from behind, grasped my hands together under her rib cage and constricted up one, two, three, four times.

I stopped and asked, "Is this helping? Are you still choking?" I wanted to make sure I wasn't hurting her or making things worse. She was able to nod so I went back to trying to help her get out whatever was blocking her air flow.

A few thrusts later, she coughed out the culprit.

It was an innocuous piece of lettuce she had inhaled through a straw from her drink. I don't know if it had lodged in her windpipe, her throat or what. All we know is she couldn't breathe.

Do you want to know what I still can't get over?

No one else did anything. Her friend sitting inches away from her just watched. The employees behind the bar just watched. The people at the other tables just watched.

No one mobilized. No one went to her to ask if she was okay. No one pounded on her back. No one called 911.

There was an ambulance and a fire engine that had arrived across the street a few moments before for a different matter. If the Heimlich maneuver hadn't worked, I was a few seconds away from telling her boyfriend to run across the street and get one of the fire-fighters or ER crew.

She went to the bathroom to collect herself and get cleaned up (her face was smeared with mascara from the tears that had been streaming down her face).

She came out moments later and said, "Who just saved my life?"

Everyone pointed at me. She came over, hugged me and asked, "Are you a nurse?"

I shook my head. "No, I was a lifeguard a long time ago and my training came back to me in the moment."

She said, "The least I can do is pay for your breakfast."

Suffice it to say, ten minutes later, everything was back to "normal."

It's several hours later now, and I'm still processing what happened. It could have had a very different outcome.

I discussed this with my son Andrew, his wife Miki, and her mom and dad who are here this weekend and asked for their input as to why no one did anything.

They told me people are reluctant "to help" these days because they worry about "doing something wrong" and getting sued.

They said people don't know what to do - so they freeze and don't do anything.

They said people who are choking often don't flail around or call for help (she wasn't, she couldn't) so people in the vicinity don't realize how serious it is.

They said some people "don't want to get involved."

What do you think? What would you have done?

BTW - hope you're never in a position where you need this, but just in case someone around you is choking and in need of help, here's how to do the Heimlich Maneuver correctly. https://www.wikihow.com/Perform-the-Heimlich-Maneuver

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Sam Horn, Founder/CEO of the Intrigue Agency and TEDx speaker, is on a mission to help people create respectful, collaborative, real-life communications that add value for all involved. Her books - including IDEApreneur, Tongue Fu! POP! and Washington Post bestseller Got Your Attention? – have been featured on NPR and in NY Times, Forbes, INC and presented to Intel, NASA, Boeing, Cisco, ASAE, and Capital One. Want Sam to speak to your group? Contact [email protected]