I, me, myself

Back in my childhood days, I remember being a topper in my class. Fellow students would rush to check my answer sheets in awe to gauge how well did I perform. It was a phenomenal feeling. However, my euphoria came to a halt when a fresh batch of students joined our class, especially a nerd who was brilliant at studies. Soon, he toppled me over and grabbed the top spot. I skidded from 1st and eventually reached the 10th rank. What suddenly happened and what did I do wrong?

Looking at his prowess, I lost what had always kept me on top, my individuality and my own method. So bowled over I was with his performance, that I took notes from him and tried to imitate his style of operating, his schedule, the timetable he followed to study, etc.

Rather than being myself and improving, I tried to be someone else and paid the price for it.

Individuality is nothing but the unique elements that constitute us. It is what segregates us from the rest of the world, by presenting us as someone with a unique set of beliefs, and opinions in contrast to others.

In each journey that we traverse – health, learning, career progression, personal, there are always mentors, coaches, and stalwarts whom we look up to. But rather than learning from them, we try and blatantly copy their style. And the outcome we receive is a no-brainer.

Why shouldn’t we be like the rest of us?

Epictetus, a Greek stoic, ran a philosophy school in Nicopolis in the second century AD. In his discourses, Epictetus fondly describes an exemplary Stoic, Paconius Agrippinus. At the time of Roman emperor Nero’s reign, Agrippinus was the only one who didn’t conform to the defined set of rules, and never devalued his own thinking, even in the face of misfortunes. When asked, “why don’t you be like the rest of us?” His reply was, “But I want to be the red, that small and brilliant portion which causes the rest to appear comely and beautiful. Why, then, do you say to me,?“Be like the majority of people?” And if I do that, how shall I any longer be the red?

To be like everyone else looks to be safe but rationally, it’s the riskiest proposition. We end up hiding in a chorus, freeing ourselves from any sort of judgment, being laughed at. However, with this, the opportunity of being noticed, appreciated, or lauded is also squandered.

It's important to embrace who we are, as that makes us unique. We have premium value when we are ourselves, else we become fungible.

How to find and embrace our individuality

Finding our individuality isn’t an easy process. The uniqueness needs to be extracted meticulously from the recesses of our inner self. Acknowledging past failures, anticipating future failures, and yet continuing to aim for perfection is a key cornerstones for finding one’s individuality.

Moreover, being cognizant of our likes, dislikes, moral values, and ethics helps in creating a self-portrait to which one can relate fully. People who do not hesitate in portraying these parts of their personalities, tend to understand themselves better.

What special can we do as an individual?

An individual can stand up and revolt against the whole world. The world might win but the sense of freedom within him would be enough to move mountains.

An individual can help educate a homeless child and can help in contributing funds for the needy. An individual can sit on the topmost seat of the country and save democracy.

An individual can be kind to his fellow beings, and help in uplifting the confidence of one another.

In each of these instances, the world doesn’t undergo a massive transformation or a herculean change. But it does create a small dent that can penetrate and form huge cracks gradually. Had these “individuals” not existed, the idea of a liveable world would sound unfathomable.

“It takes nothing to join the crowd. It takes everything to stand alone” – Hans F Hansen